| Author |
Message |
Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Monday, January 18, 2021 - 10:25 pm 
True.. especially with my spelling.. used to be girls would only spell it Lynne ..
I have seen it now as Lynne, Lynn, Lyn, Lin, Linn, Line (that was on Canadian Master Chef), and Linh (Vietnamese)
And with my last name, then people hear it run together and call me Linda. Whatever.
One thing I wonder is how they handle pronouns used by multiples? The pronouns shift when personalities switch. And co-conscious groups would use we/us or y'all.
I must remember to ask ;)
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Christy358
Member
07-10-2007
| Monday, January 18, 2021 - 11:05 pm
When someone tells me their pronouns, I take it as a help. I do not have to wonder if that person I can only see from the neck up is a he, she. they or more. You tell me your name is XXX and I will call you that. You ask me to use a specific pronoun, you got it. No harm to me or anyone else.
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Monday, January 18, 2021 - 11:19 pm
Yes, I agree.
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Dipo
Member
04-23-2002
| Tuesday, January 19, 2021 - 10:41 am
LOL, I now have a husband because my first name and my initial form a male name. And at some point the banks all changed my credit card name to be the first name and initial.... Lloy D, so now some people gave me a husband, Lloyd.
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Mack
Member
07-22-2002
| Tuesday, January 19, 2021 - 1:52 pm
My wife’s first name is Carey. That is the typical male spelling and she often gets mail and email for Mr Carey K. Her mother always claimed she was on drugs when she filled out the birth certificate information right after the delivery.
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Teachmichigan
Member
07-22-2001
| Friday, January 22, 2021 - 3:20 pm
Our teacher is using pronouns not only to indicate her preference in her e-mails, but to also show her students that she acknowledges (as you all said above) that assumptions can't be made about based on names or looks or body parts that students are born with. It is simply a sign of inclusivity and acceptance.
Our principal said HE had to "take lumps" with her when people "questioned" it. She said - fine! LOL
They had a meeting, it did not produce any change, and so I'm now just counting the days until I can retire on May 6, 2022.
Thank YOU all for showing that learning about new ways of being respectful is not a difficult thing to do. LOVE YOU!
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Friday, January 22, 2021 - 4:02 pm
Teach,both have certainly had a frustrating experience there, but I suspect you have often been a voice of reason and the students can see that, or hear that, at times.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Sunday, January 31, 2021 - 12:34 am
With me, I look male with very short hair and eye brows that never grew back and you can't see if I have on lipstick with a mask on and I don't have pierced ears (not as much a decision point as it used to be), so a lot of people assume I am a man. It has always been a problem which is why I always had a hair style and wore make up. now that I am old, don't wear much makeup and don't dress all girly like I used to do. Sweat pants are sweat pants and pretty much all I wear now. I should wear pronouns, but instead I just let people call me anything they want.
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Dipo
Member
04-23-2002
| Sunday, January 31, 2021 - 12:16 pm
Hahahaha Sadiesmom, too funny. Maybe you should get some of those bows for you hair like they use for newborns, LOL.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Sunday, January 31, 2021 - 7:13 pm
No no no. Maybe I should not wear a man's black leather jacket in spring and fall. My husband bought it for me from an employee special sale and the woman's jacket he bought me had real thin sleeves only a skeleton could wear. When he returned it they only had men's left.
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Juju2bigdog
Member
10-27-2000
| Sunday, January 31, 2021 - 9:46 pm
How about a hat or baseball cap with She/Her in the MAGA position?
Hahahaha, they actually have such things! Or, here is a nice one: baseball cap
It would go nicely with the black leather jacket.
Maybe pink or yellow gloves and scarf to accessorize?
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Sunday, January 31, 2021 - 11:14 pm
With covid hiding, I think my hair will be back first. Probably waist length.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 5:57 pm
OK now I am mad. I have had this credit card for 20 years. I pay it off every month although I have been off by a day or two. Well last month I forgot, I went to pay it and must have been distracted and thought I paid it. It is almost time to pay for the next month and I went to get gas and my card was declined. I charge a abut 500 a month maybe less with covid. but I have paid it for years. so forgot once and they bounced me. I have not gotten the next statement yet and they are declining me. Guess I won't be buying anything where I need a visa. My only other card is AMEX. Lots of places don't take it. Don't ask me about when I switched card types with Amex, I yelled at them until they gave me a bunch of stuff, that was a 40 year and switch and they gave me a hard time. 490 years. don't people know how to do business anymore. are we just numbers now and they don't care how much business they lose. That was when I found my ex listed me on a bank application as his wife and it was long after he remarried and it screwed up my credit rating until I got that straightened out.
Now I need a new visa card.
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Kookliebird
Member
08-04-2005
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 6:15 pm
Did you discuss this with Visa? I had a simple thing happen a few years back and forgot to make a payment. I called, was very apologetic, mentioned that if they checked my account, they would see that I’ve never been late, paying off every month and asked if there was any possibility of reinstating the card. They did reinstate and I continue to use it. Sometimes, just being extremely sorry works.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 6:34 pm
Oh they would reinstate my card, but I want a different one. I can't believe they would cut it off for missing one payment. ! ONE UNO. after so many years of not missing a payment. the next bill is not due for 2 weeks. they do not deserve my business,
it was chase saphire, BTW. I keep looking for cards and they say that is the best. Not in my estimation. I think they are very stupid, so I didn't get what I wanted, I can buy it in a store that will take my AMEX and be fine. Costco only takes Visa.
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Kookliebird
Member
08-04-2005
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 7:26 pm
Won’t it impact your credit rating if they cancel due to payment issues?
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Sugar
Member
08-15-2000
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 9:37 pm
It is not unreasonable for a credit card company to cancel or place a hold on a card that was not paid. Even if it only happened once. I rather doubt there are any algorithms that would check a payment history and continue to allow charges. They only know you didn't send a payment.
The non payment error was your error, albeit accidental on your part.
Kookliebird is right in suggesting that you call them, let them know you made 1 error in a long history with them and request that they dismiss any late fees that may have occurred.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Wednesday, March 03, 2021 - 10:16 pm
U went on line, found the bill and paid it and the fines. I just think it is unreasonable to put a decline on something that is few weeks 0late. I think it is bad business. They could have sent me an e-mail, they could have called me, but they put on a decline so I could not pay for gas. The bill was due the 18th of Feb. this is the 2nd of March after 20 or so years of paying on time. I don't want to have this card anymore. I will find another hopefully not stupid company. If all companies are getting this stupid, I will go back to cash. I am going to the bank to get cash tomorrow and going back to the store to buy the stuff I want.
Amex did not put a stop on my card, they want my money.
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Kookliebird
Member
08-04-2005
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 2:21 am
This is all done by computers, not people. Every credit card company attached to a bank, will have exactly the same process for delinquent payments.
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Scooterrific
Member
07-07-2005
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 5:59 am
Sadies this is all computerized now. Once the payment due date passes and no payment is made, it's automatically set not to accept any more charges. As soon as payment is received and posted, it automatically returns to accept new charges.
There's not someone sitting in the office going over everyone's payment history.
As someone mentioned above, calling them and speaking to them will go a long way. They most likely will waive any late fee that you've incurred.
Also changing companies isn't going to help, everything is linked to a computer and is done the same way.
While I realize it can be frustrating, I don't think you should take it personal, and I'm sure if you called them they'd be very apologetic. That being said, the same thing will happen again if the payment is missed.
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Karuuna
Board Administrator
08-30-2000
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 8:36 am
yeah, it's not personal. But it's also not good business to not contact her and let her know that they would have to put a hold on her card until they received a payment.
I just accidentally paid my AmEx with a checking account that I had closed. I got an Email when the payment was refused by my bank.
Unfortunately, when I went to the AmEx website, it was marked paid and returned but wouldn't let me make a new payment! I was worried that it would be late now, but the chat operator noted that they don't consider them late on the due date, they consider them late 15 days later. That's a much more generous policy than most VISA cards!
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Kappy
Member
06-28-2002
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 9:20 am
BANKS!  
I get Sadie's frustration when you've been with a bank for so long. Our local teacher's credit union (formed by local teachers some 50 years ago) was bought by another teacher's union from Southern Cal. It has been two months of frustration. We were given a list of dates as to when this or that account could or could not be accessed, when cards would be switched over, etc. and not only did those dates turn out to be false but their website kept going down for days at a time. People lost money in their accounts, new debit cards didn't work, you name it. It was NOT pretty. I had taken out plenty of cash ahead of time in case anything went wrong and I'm so glad I did because others weren't able to access their account for more then a week after the takeover. The worst part is they kept blaming customers for not reading their emails properly. The fact is that they knew exactly how many new customers they were going to have and they didn't prepare nor did they have staff on hand to deal with it.
So I get Sadie's frustration. I know it's not personal but as a counselor once told me - money is VERY emotional! Don't mess with our money!
Sadie - try setting up an auto-pay of whatever amounth you want for each month. Then if you forget to check, it's automatically done.
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Sadiesmom
Member
03-13-2002
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 11:03 am
I called someone and talked to them right away and years ago when I had a problem they would offer me deals. when Amex said they could not give me a new card when I was changing types, it was because my credit rating was screwed up thank you ex husband they explained it to me. I got it straightened out and they sent me an apology, the new card and a new leather date book.
I was late with a payment by 2 days the other year and the VISA guy took away all late fees and interest. This time I did not even get an I'm sorry we can fix this here is what we can do, I got "this is your own fault, when we get the money you will be turned on. is there anything else".
I still think after decades you should get more than 2 weeks. I know there are scammers, I know there are people who go broke, but I still (not for long) have an excellent credit rating 800 something. I think it is bad business that there are not multiple paths in their computer. I know about computers, I used to program them. I did a lot of accounts payable systems in the early years.
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Sugar
Member
08-15-2000
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 11:58 am
So you want them to not turn off your card when you don't make a payment and then give you free stuff later?
This is certainly frustrating but you are in the wrong and being unreasonable with your expectations. You made an error and they do not owe you an apology for you not paying your bill. Visa has the right and indeed fiscal responsibility to not allow a delinquent card to be used. The onus is not on Visa to call you when you miss a payment.
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Tntitanfan
Member
08-02-2001
| Thursday, March 04, 2021 - 12:25 pm
It is hard when you are treated like a bum! BUT the computer system does not know you and what a great person you are!
I have three credit cards, one of which I never use so that I always have a $10,00+ credit line available. When I was on a home-hospital-rehab center treadmill, more than one bill got overlooked by my friends who were handling bill paying. In no case was a card ever refused. I have Visa, Mastercard, and Dicover and use them roughly in rotation.
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