Archive through October 18, 2000

The ClubHouse: The Game - Play Room: The Virtual House: The Internet Camera...: Archive through October 18, 2000

Talisker

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 06:20 pm Click here to edit this post
Vykin, if I stay, I will call you anything you want!!

What is with the weird banner? Tali - don't be so sure you are the one going??

Who comes up with this stuff?!

I'm already packed! Xenia! If you leave I will be happy for you! If I leave, I will be happy for me! Win - win! These late nights are wiping me out!

Talisker

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 06:29 pm Click here to edit this post
But, if I stay, I will be happy with that too!! :)

Arreal

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 06:36 pm Click here to edit this post
Singing a happy song right now.

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL, a Monday Night party!!!!!!!! Hank is back. Yippie!!!!

I can sit in front of the tube again and watch my game. Go Steelers!!!! Okay, so they aren't playing tonight, but what the hey.

Did I ever mention one of my passions is collecting football cards. lol I even got my hubby into watching the game. :)
He's sitting on the couch watching the Jaq and the Titans and I'm here...waiting for the big BOOT.
I'm still hoping the Titans kick some bootie.

Well, I don't have my good puter back....so sad, but it's MONDAY!!!! Yippie!!!!

I hope to be in chat and see all you.

My bags are packed and I'm ready to go, see you on the other side friends.

Bye

Vykin

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 06:41 pm Click here to edit this post
walks outside, it's so quiet this evening, thinking) You can cut the tension with a knife in here. Everyone, and I mean All of us seem nervous about banishment tonite. Even though this is virtual world, its most certainly has effect on all of us in our real worlds. I think we're all feeling anxious and sad. I'm thinking of Mantastic tonite, wondering if he is watching. Somehow I think if he had not left, we could have had some interesting conversations. I am hopeful whoever gets banished, will participate on the outside. Regardless, whoever leaves tonite, the impact will be felt in the house.

Talisker

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 06:56 pm Click here to edit this post
Just want to say goodbye to everyone - just in case I leave - it has been fun! Really, it has! See you on the outside when you get sprung!

Xenia

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 07:01 pm Click here to edit this post
I'm 99% sure I'm outta here...

It's been a slice guys...

I can't wait to see all the hateful things that have been written about me. :)

Xenia

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 07:58 pm Click here to edit this post
Ok, I've got it...

Not "crude".

Crass.

Savage.

I like those better.

Zebulon

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 08:08 pm Click here to edit this post
Xenia,

FAKE sounds more accurate.

How about HATEFUL?

Xenia

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 08:34 pm Click here to edit this post
"Fake"? "Hater"? To describe you? Yeah, I'd agree with that.

Xenia

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 08:36 pm Click here to edit this post
Ooops. I misread your post.

You are very FAKE, Zeb. You have been ever since the day you bashed Himay.

Hateful? No, That's not you.

You're just a total prick and ass-kisser.

Zebulon

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 09:06 pm Click here to edit this post
Can you honestly say you act like this in real life, Xenia?

You're basing my "realness" on one incident?

At least when I stir up sh1t, it's for a good reason and not just to be spouting off hot air like you do. As for being an "asskisser" and a "total prick", I think those are just empty, meaningless insults geared at attempting to boost your own self-esteem that is lacking.

Arreal

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 09:19 pm Click here to edit this post
<looking around> I think I'm lost. I was looking for the internet camera, but it seems as though I have entered a war zone? <ducking out of here>

Xenia

Monday, October 16, 2000 - 09:34 pm Click here to edit this post
Zeb: I'm getting the chills. You've just got me so well analyzed.

Why don't we call a truce. You ignore me and I'll ignore you.

Do you think you can do that?

Vykin

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 12:36 am Click here to edit this post
Hello to whoever is out there, No address tonite, My real body is physically in pain right now. I have to get it checked out. Have a good sleep all.

Luke

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 02:32 am Click here to edit this post
Just checking in with all of you... Was chatting with Roger in the living room... trying to give him a pep talk about going outside to see what you guys have posted about us...
Today has been a wild monday for me... It was great to see so many of you in the chats... And it was totally awesome to hear positive comments about everyone enjoying the game!
Gail/Tali, if you're out there, sweet dreams... and I'll look forward to getting to know you more once I'm outta here...
And to everyone else... I may not remember your names right now from the chat room, but I want to get to know so many of you as well after this experience is over...
Have a wonderful night!

Himay10ns

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 04:28 am Click here to edit this post
Good morning All! Once again, I'm the only one up in the early morning. I just spent the last hour catching up on the late night convos. Looks like Roger and Xenia had a great conversation. I admire Roger for being able to soothe Xenia into having a nice discussion. I know she isn't happy staying, but I'm glad she's still around. She adds so much to this game and I have learned a lot from her being here. She knows about things I've never even heard of....Mercury Retrograde?????

Thanks to everyone who DIDN'T vote for me! Nominations are due tomorrow and it's really going to be tough!

Hi Tali! How are things on the outside?? There is definitely a void in here without you. I guess we'll see you soon....have a great day everyone!

Vykin

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 06:28 am Click here to edit this post
Good Morning, I'm off to the doctor in a while, but wanted to come on and say my sympathies to any of the viewers on the outside from Missouri on the tragic death of your Governor, his son, and I believe the pilot?, When I crawled into bed last night Cnn had just broken the news. (Host does this mean I've had outside contact?). Regardless, viewers of Missouri, my condolences on the passing of Gov. Carnahan? (See us Canadians watch American news also).

To Tali, well this is your first night and morning on the outside. I hope you had a good sleep. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to know you better with all the "schmozzle" (a canadian expression) that occured. But as soon as I get booted I will certainly look you up and maybe we could grab a beer, glass of wine, whatever and catch up. I certainly would like to get to know you better after The Game.

Xenia

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 11:09 am Click here to edit this post
Re: Recent banner.

The soap brings back BB memories!!! They're getting less, but I still have pangs of anxiety over the show ending.

Continue to thank Prince for keep us all updated.

Thanks for making me smile. :)

Arreal

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 12:16 pm Click here to edit this post
(((Group hug))) for all who voted to keep me in the game. I appreciate it.

Gail, I hope things are going well for you on the outside. There's an empty spot in the boards without you here. I promise not to flirt with your man too much while your away. It was Zeb wasn't it? :)

hello and good morning, afternoon, day to all of you out there. Things are quiet around here.
Nominations are coming up so cross your fingers, hold your breath, but don't hold it past the point of blue okay. We'll be fine either way.

I'm sorry I missed the chat yesterday, that really sucked bad. I really felt alone here, knowing all my housemates were gone, chatting with you all.

I miss you my friends.

Be nice to each other out there all. It's just a game. (((All)))

Vykin

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 02:35 pm Click here to edit this post
To the People of the World and Others:
Well went to doctor, hate doctors, but seems some tests are required. (I better study).
Mantastic!!!!!!! Taliiiiii if you here me and have time chck out my Updated website, seems the webdesigner has dedicated some space for both of you. VykinFanClub

Also if I have any friends out there, a real friend lasered some of my family photos onto a disc and I can finally share them with all of you.
Enjoy!: My Family Photos

Vykin

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 02:40 pm Click here to edit this post
Sorry folks, I'm technically illiterate when it comes to posting links, Let me try again:

http://hometown.aol.com/vykinfanclub/ VykinFanClub

http://members.aol.com/Rossanader/index8.html
Vykin Family Photos

Moondance

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 05:07 pm Click here to edit this post
Hi Everyone!!!
Well, I snuck out of class last night but my laptop failed me! I tried but had to give up when it decided not to type. I miss you all & seeing the names pop up in the chat room! Things seem to be pretty good now and some good discussions are going on! I am learning so much about some deep fears I have ... about judgments and validation... I can't thank Lisa, Neil and you all enough. Thanks for everything ... can't wait to see everyone in the next chat!

Moondance

Tuesday, October 17, 2000 - 05:41 pm Click here to edit this post
I want to say a special Good-bye to Tali/Gail... I wasn't able to hug you before you left because I had to get back to class! Hope all is well and you had fun... I hope your Mom is better!:)

Vykin

Wednesday, October 18, 2000 - 12:03 am Click here to edit this post
Hullo, whoever is out there.
I hope u all had a chance to click the link to my family photos. Its not always that I share my private life online so I ask that you not spread them to too many people. If you missed the link, here it is again:
http://members.aol.com/Rossanader/index8.html

Today has been quiet here, everyone seems to be reflecting. Before I turn in, I will share a BedTime Story about Age and Growing Old:

A few years back I was in a facilitators training workshop. Robert *****, from California was the main presenter and trainer. The man had bleached white hair, very trim and combed to perfection. He dressed well. After 3 days of sessions with him. Some of us felt he was a bit full of himself, and cocky. I don't recollect what led to the following question, but here's the lesson Robert taught me and those privileged to listen:

Robert was asked how old he was. He replied, "I am Sixty". A gasp fell over the room. We did not believe he was sixty. (Looked perhaps in his early fifties, (like the guys younger adults talk about - who drive around in convertibles trying to relive their childhood).

The next question to Robert: "What did it feel like when you turned sixty?".

Suddenly Roberts demeanor changed. He sat on a stool and began to tell us a story, in a most humbling way. His persona completely changed. His voice lowered and in a hushed voice he spoke:

"The worst year of my life, was my 59th year. I became obsessed and fearful of turning Sixty. As the year fast approached sixty, I began having anxiety attacks. Throughout my life, I had always felt the number 60 means you're old. I never thought I could be Old. As the day drew nearer, I realized I couldn't handle it, I had suicidal thoughts. My wife noticed the decline in me. She was very concerned and tried to reassure me that I wasn't old, not to worry. It didn't comfort me, I became consumed with the idea I can't do it, I can't accept being old. I fell into a deep depression."

"We live on the ocean in California," he said. "One day, my darkest day, I decided I'm going to the ocean and commit suicide.". We listened intently, not a sound from the room.

Robert continued, "I walked out to the beach, I cried, I looked out into the vast ocean. Something happened inside me, without realizing I stooped down and picked up a few pebbles off the beach, rolled them unknowingly in my hands." "My thoughts began to change as I looked at the pebbles in my hand", "What a pathetic man I am, not wanting to get old". "Then something occurred to me, as I looked at these pebbles", he continued, "I picked out 7 of the nicer pebbles, before I commit suicide, I'm going to think back on my life."
Robert, continued, it was passed the lunch break, but we didn't move.

"I took the first pebble, I tried to remember every single thought I had between the age of 0 - 10. As I completed my thoughts, I took that pebble and tossed it out to the ocean", "I continued with the next pebble, thought about my life from 10-20years".

Robert continued - he took each decade of his life thus far, thought about all the wonderful things he could think, and with the completion of each decade, he'd toss the pebble into the ocean - with a smile.

Finally, he had one pebble left. It was for the time of 60-70 years. He looked at it, he realized he'd just spent hours on the beach, thinking about his whole life. And what a good life it had been, wife, children, friends. It was then he realized, how silly he'd been to be so fearful of turning Sixty, and how ashamed he was to realize how close he came to ending his life for no good reason, but his own selfishness.

Robert, looked again at his last pebble. He took it, put it in his pocket, and on that day he realized how much he looked forward to the next decade of his life.

Someone asked, what he did with that last pebble. Robert smiled, put his hand in his pocket and pulled it out, showed it to us all, like a badge of honor. He said, "This pebble is not ready to be thrown into the ocean yet - its purpose is done yet".

So, to all the elderly folks out there, and those who feel they are old. Take some time, find some pebbles, think about each decade of your own life, smile, and toss that pebble, but save the memories, for they, Never Grow Old.

(The above true story I dedicate to my friend "Triplicate", who is 59years old, whom I met not too long ago,during BB chats and though decades span between us, she has taught me things I never could imagine, most importantly her zest for life at the age she is! Big Canadian Grizzly Hug to you my friend, you know who you are)

Xenia

Wednesday, October 18, 2000 - 02:38 am Click here to edit this post
Enough hogging the camera, Giblets!

I'm having trouble sleeping.

Ever since I looked through the domestic violence thread and began to finally see how passive/aggressive Zeb really is, the idea of him having the personality of an abuser really bothers me. People like him are so unpredictable.

They appear to be balanced on the outside, but there's definite issues raging inside.

And then I ask myself, how do I feel about participating in a game with a potential abuser? What has happened to all the women who have entered his life? Do they all share a secret about the way he really is? Zeb seems like the type who would be abusive then swear his victim deserved it and he did nothing wrong.

What I wouldn't give to put a leather collar around Zeb's neck, put him in a diaper, grab him by the hair and push his head in my toilet and make him lick it clean. I'd want him to know what it feels like to be powerless just like, I am almost certain, he has made women feel.

I could be wrong. It's just this feeling I have.