Topic # 13 Internet Discussion Boards
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Topic # 13 Internet Discussion Boards
Now that the three of you have had some intimate experience using discussion boards, explain to us how one poster can 'trust' another poster they have never met? Why do people go to a bulletin board and reveal their problems and place emotional trust and intimacy in people who are just leaving messages on a board? How can you be sure the people you are opening up to are being honest and can be trustworthy? How can you become so close to someone you have never met or even spoken to?
Vykin | Monday, October 30, 2000 - 11:37 am  how one poster can 'trust' another poster they have never met? You can't initially, trust is a series of building blocks on a foundation. If the foundation develops a crack, the blocks crumble. Why do people go to a bulletin board and reveal their problems and place emotional trust and intimacy in people who are just leaving messages on a board? Some folks are lonely or isolated, the internet is a way of talking to "someone" out there. Others lead "open book" lives, its not a matter of "life or death" so they post emotional and become intimate. The trick is to decipher which posts are legitimate concerns and which may be "abnormally" balanced concerns. How can you be sure the people you are opening up to are being honest and can be trustworthy? Faith and belief that not everyone on the 'net is a deranged person. How can you become so close to someone you have never met or even spoken to? For me its a gut feeling. Time spent chatting, the content of the chat. Looking for "signals" in the conversation that may be "redflags". Making a concentrate decision on what you yourself respond and wish to "share", and when. Timing is everything. Its like my fav phrase: "Its All Optics" The Title (i.e. a screenname) is the illusion. The Content (what one says - is what's important" |
Roger_Ramjet | Monday, October 30, 2000 - 12:36 pm  This one will be impossible for me to answer in terms of a generality. My only experience is with BBFC and now TVClubHouse. I hope the answer would be the same though, after reflecting for a few seconds. Vyk pretty much got it all down. It's a process that you go through, interctaing with someone or a group. Getting a feel for waht they are doing. Because you can never know for sure, it's just that---a feeling. I would also look at the area the posting is in. If it's not moderated, obviously there is a higher risk. Any attempted filter is better than none...so long as you don't assume that filter or filters remove all risk. There are all sorts of people out there, so I assume all sorts are on line. This being my only experience though, I can't say waht Ive done or gone by in actual situations. I can only speculate the aproach I'd take...the same as I have since being with Neil and co. Vyk had a good term---gut feeling. Yes, thought processes are used, although when a choice is made to trust or not trust, it is feelings that are used to make the choice. |
Himay10ns | Monday, October 30, 2000 - 01:06 pm  Now that the three of you have had some intimate experience using discussion boards, explain to us how one poster can 'trust' another poster they have never met? I think I am a naturally trusting person until someone betrays that trust. Maybe to the point of being naive. I would like to believe that all people have good intentions. When I find the opposite is true, I am usually shocked. Why do people go to a bulletin board and reveal their problems and place emotional trust and intimacy in people who are just leaving messages on a board? That's easy....it's like psychiatric help and fellowship for free!! You can say whatever you please because you know in your mind these people can't see you, can't judge you, can't find you. You can say and be whatever or whoever you want. It's utterly harmless. How can you be sure the people you are opening up to are being honest and can be trustworthy? You can never be TOTALLY sure...but it's like Vyk said...it's a gut feeling. And you let your walls down a little bit at a time so as not to get hurt. How can you become so close to someone you have never met or even spoken to? Oh, I find that to be the easiest part. Each person's level of trust continues to grow with each interaction. I've met lots of people online, talked on the phone to some, met some in person, even went to Hawaii with one last summer. Like I said, I tend to be a very trusting person with good instinct. If I smell a rat, it's usually a rat! |
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