Survivor Insider: Episode 11

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Joan

Tuesday, January 01, 2002 - 10:42 pm Click here to edit this post
This one's especially for the Survivor fans in Orange County! *winks*

Balloon ride to a champagne breakfast—Lex and Tom stare out over a vast field from inside a hot air balloon. As they descend, Tom and Lex sit down in the basket. The “pilot” laughs and Yee Haws in his Australian accent as they touch down and he welcomes them back to “terra firma.” The basket begins to tip over which is evident not only from the pilot’s comments but also by the fact that the camera is now filming everything upside down. They climb out commenting on how much fun the ride was. As Tom puts it, “It was better than them wilderbeatests.” They congratulate the pilot (who is about as chipper as the Crocodile Hunter) and make their way to a table set under a tree with champagne and breakfast. Lex narrates saying “it is the stuff you dream about.” The pilot pours the champagne, toasts them and takes his leave. Tom is heard in a voiceover saying that his mind has been a pretty tight thing but this experience has given him “new life.” He is 45 and thought he had done some things but this has shown him that there is more to life than just “what’s around the corner at the house.” (He must be calculating that in reverse dog years.) “It’s an experience I’ll carry til the day I die” he proclaims. Lex and Tom look around and marvel at where they are sitting—at a table with a red checkered cloth in the middle of a valley surrounded by hills in Africa. “This is downright civilized!” Lex announces. Tom wonders facetiously what the others are doing and Lex just laughs.

Lex & Tom: Dinner à duex—Tom and Lex walk into the tented area as Tom looks around exclaiming “This is like a vacation resort, isn’t it?” African music plays as we are given a look at the table set for them by the river. There is silver cutlery, a wooden pepper gringer, a green tablecloth and candles burning. (I think this clip was meant for the show by the way it has been enhanced) Tom and Lex approach from a thicket and, as they approach, Lex sighs saying “I can smell it! I can smell Heaven!” An African server is waiting by the table to welcome them. He pulls out Tom’s chair for him and joins the chef standing nearby with the grill. Tom starts in on the liquor announcing his intent to get a buzz going. The server places a dish before Tom telling him its African name. Tom asks what it is and Lex says “It looks like smoked salmon.” The server gives a hearty laugh at this and, through it says “Yeah! Smoked salmon.” Tom tells Lex he “ain’t never had it.” Lex asks him what he thinks and Tom kind of chuckles and contemplates the piece he is holding in his hand. Tom asks what Lex is drinking. He tells him it is sherry and offers Tom some. He declines saying, “I know a woman named Sherry. I don’t like her.” Lex remarks that they have gone from the “most uncivilized place to the most civilized place” and Tom adds that they have gone from “the poorest to the best” as he places a cloth napkin atop his hat. (I don’t know why, I just describe what I see.) Tom asks the server his name, it is Philip. Tom makes the introductions giving his name as “Big Tom.” Tom warns Lex not to fill up because there is more to come but Lex assures him that he has room for everything. Tom remarks that Lex eats a lot. Tom shouts to Francis, the cook, to see if he is ok. “I ain’t the prettiest date you ever had but I bet I’ll be the happiest!” Tom tells Lex. “You may not be the prettiest but you’re the luckiest date I ever had!” he replies around a mouthful of food. As Philip comes to collect their dishers, Tom slaps him on the back and assures him that no matter what he does, they are going to leave him a big tip so he might as well take his time and “kick back a while.” It becomes obvious that Tom is a little tipsy as he expounds on how much they intend to pay Francis and Philip with the Visa card. “We ain’t got no money but we got a Visa card!” They chuckle politely and nod saying a few things in another language. Tom says “I don’t know him that well but his card’s good” to which Lex agrees, “Jeff’s good for a tip.” Tom announces that he “ain’t never drunk champagne or wine in Virginia much less in Africa!” What follows are a few quick shots of Tom saying some nonsensical things, probably to demonstrate that he is drunk. Tom tells Lex that his “old lady” still has to rub some wool in his face to get him excited. “It’s a hell of a lot better than Viagra.”

Big Tom likes meat, meat, meat—Philip asks them if they would like lamb or chicken. Lex asks for lamb and Philip goes over to relay this to Francis. Tom yells over to Francis telling him “you’ve cooker yer ass off! Get the hell over here!” Lex gestures to a spot inviting Francis to come sit down with them. Cuts to Philip serving Tom and Lex and Tom again yelling to Francis, this time in praise. Francis laughs and gives him the thumbs up. We see them enjoying their food with many “Mmmms.” Tom orders more and more steak explaining his desire for beef by mooing. He laughs at the number of forks on the table and wonders why he would need four forks. (Oh Tom, what a great ambassador of our fine western culture you are!) He encourages Philip to take his time over and over while Philip mumbles his thanks politely. It is growing darker. Tom improvises some sign language to show Philip that he will get “Big tip. Lots o’ money.” He calls out to Francis asking for more meat as Philip walks over with cake. Tom looks up at him and asks “You don’t got no more meat?” Philip says he has cake and sets it down in front of Tom. Lex tells him the meat is gone but Tom continues to lament the lack of meat while he eats his chocolate cake. A few shots of Tom drunkenly talking about meat and the tip he plans to leave follow. He mumbles something that sounds like an expression of dislike for fruit. Lex asks why he doesn’t like it, “it’s good for ya!” “It makes me horny” he replies. Lex quickly says he doesn’t want that since they are sharing a tent together. More clips of Tom asking for meat and promising big tips from his “Visa, Virginia, vagin…er…Visa.” Lex thanks Philip and Francis for dinner.

Lex & Tom’s drunken spree—Lex and Tom enter their tent and admire the miniature wooden animals and cards that have been left on their pillows by the staff. Tom asks Lex to read him the card repeatedly and eventually picks it up and tries to read it aloud himself. The card welcomes them to the resort and hopes they enjoy the sights and sounds of Africa. Tom, holding a beer in one hand, calls Lex over to the door of the tent, puts his arm around him and says “You’re my guest!” Lex laughs and says “You’re my guest.” They walk outside where Tom sings to himself as he stumbles around. He says he didn’t know they had a bed together. Lex says he didn’t either otherwise “I woulda picked Little Kim!” Tom mumbles about what a woman she is. Drunkenly he learns over and tells Lex “You never made a man happier than you did me tonight.” Again he starts rambling about the tips he intends to leave. He vows to be sure they each get “at least 15%” and if that’s not possible, he’ll send them a cheque when he gets home. (Wow, eloquent and generous too!) Tom talks about building an ark and then breaks into some dirty jodies about women and their bodies as well as his stinky socks. They are sitting in the dark and you can hear rain coming down around them as they continue to drink. Tom lectures Lex on his plan to pass down wisdom to the younger generation in order to make them strong. His advice to them is to drink the water, mate with the women, wait until you have no sweat left on your body and then mate with the women and don’t worry about rhinos. This will ensure the survival and strength of the tribe. (Thanks Tom, I will take that to heart.) They are “strong with the women and strong with the animals and now we are superior. Yeah.” He raises his bottle at this and Lex continues to look at him half amusedly. Tom figures they could have picked someone weaker for this but they picked him. He can stand eye to eye and ball to ball with the rhinos, lions and baboons. A weaker man would eat the mush but he says “F**k the mush!” He rambles on and comes to Ethan. “He’s a Jew and I did not know what a Jew meant but all I know is, he’s a good man.” Lex agrees. “If every Jew’s a good man, I’m a Jew” Tom says solemnly. They listen to the thunder and the rain and Tom comments that in “40 days and 40 nights” he hasn’t heard rain. “And if you tell me that Brandon would be my friend, I’ll tell you you’re horses**t and mashed potatoes!” He toasts the camera saying he likes Brandon’s personality but he can’t help that he’s a damn (insert some incoherent derogatory term for gays here—sounds like “water mouth”) but “you’re alright!” The camera zooms in on the fire.

Big Tom worships the porcelain god—The camera zooms out from the same fire. Lex asks Tom if he is cold but Tom continues to rant about how fortunate and happy he is to be out there and how wonderful Lex is. Lex moves over to Tom and encourages him to give up the bottle and to lay down. He helps Tom walk over to the bed and takes his shoes off for him saying all he asks is that if Tom pukes, he go outside to do it. He tries to take Tom’s hat off but Tom isn’t helping much. Camera cuts to Tom walking back inside from outside and Lex helping him back into bed once more. Lex gets into bed happily noticing how comfortable it is. The camera zooms in on Tom’s bottle on the nightstand. Next we see Lex whispering directions to the toilet and Tom turning the water on and leaning over the it. Lex goes outside and laughs quietly. He whispers to the camera explaining that Tom is in the bathroom sitting on the floor throwing up. “He’s lost his dinner and that bottle of bourbon and everything and he didn’t quite make it to the toilet either. He’s got it everywhere. I guess it’s a good thing I went to the bathroom right before he went in there but I think he’s pretty much totaled that bathroom and I don’t know if he’s going to make it out of there. He’s kinda stoned.” The cameraman snickers and asks how much Tom drank. Lex says it was a bottle of bourbon and a couple of beers all before dinner pretty much. Tom emerges saying “you got to be sick before you get better and I’m getting better. I drank a hell of a lot more than I should.” Lex laughs and we see him turning the light off again in their tent.

Ethan: I’m not annoying—Ethan remarks on how nice Lex is. (It seems the cameraman has asked him who annoys him.) He suspects that some of it is fake because Lex is just too polite. He does a perfect impression of Lex saying “Oh no thank you!” He isn’t sure if this is how Lex really is or if this is an attempt to avoid annoying anyone and to get people on his side. He says this doesn’t really annoy him though, it is just something he has noticed. He then sounds a bit defensive saying he is trying to think of people who annoy him but he shakes his head and doesn’t seem to be able to name anyone. He doesn’t think he has changed much; he is trying to be consistent and doesn’t think he is annoying anyone, at least he is trying not to. He tries to stay quiet but he’ll joke around a bit. “I genuinely like those two guys” he says of Tom and Lex. He also genuinely likes Kim Johnson and Theresa although Theresa is “still scheming” and trying to get MamaKim but “it’s only natural because she’s cornered. She’s got to try to do something! I’d try to do the exact same thing.” Theresa is nice, upbeat and happy and isn’t getting to him really.

Inside Kim Powers—Kim explains that when you have been out there this long, you feel really good especially when you have had “a lot of factors stacked against you” but then again, when you’d made it this far, you want to make it even farther. She figures that being voted out on day 15 or something is “kinda awful or whatever but it’s liveable” but when you’ve made 33 days and there are only 6 days left, you want to make it to the end because you know “it’s cake, it’s easy. Six more days is nothing out here.” She doesn’t know anything about the political situation but she figures they will vote her out tonight since it makes the most logical sense. Tom, Lex and Ethan seem pretty close but she really isn’t into it all and has no idea. The interviewer says “Haven’t you been talking to Theresa a little bit about…?” She says all she knows is that Theresa told her Tom might vote against Lex if Lex didn’t get immunity but they are “not certain of that at all.” Theresa is working all angles and trying to save Kim because she knows that if Kim goes, she goes next. If Kim doesn’t go, the two of them could possibly go further in the game. Logically she expects to go next because she is the only one who has never been a Boran member and they have kind of been voting “in that sequence”—Brandon, Frank then her but Theresa actually lived with Boran a little bit. (Did she forget that Frank did too?) Everyone left is very different but if they share one characteristic it is adaptability. Kim has never even been camping, has never spent a single night sleeping outside, so she has adapted to “a really strange environment fairly well.” She would say the same about everyone else—they are all able to adapt to the environment and to the other people. Everyone left is “pretty mellow” and “a pretty laid back person” although “Tom is pretty out there sometimes.” That has brought them this far she thinks but to get further they need to be strategic and “not manipulative but more…cutthroat.” Being laid back will bring you far but you need strategy after that.

Tribal Council voting—Tom votes for Kim P. saying he had to vote for someone and it was her. She has been a “real friend” and he has enjoyed her company. He wishes they had been in a tribe together from the beginning but they weren’t and “the alliance worked this way. See ya honey!” He winks. MamaKim votes for Kim P. saying she has loved getting to know her but Kim is “young, energetic and very athletic and you pose a huge threat to an old lady like me.” Lex votes for “Lil’ Bit (Kim P.)” saying this is the part of the game he hates the most but he has to vote for someone. Wherever she is going tonight, he hopes she finds herself “in front of the biggest, most decadent chocolatey dessert imaginable. See ya later sweetie.” Ethan votes for Kim P. saying she is an “amazing girl” with an “amazing personality” and the “best arms in Africa.” This is “strictly part of the game, don’t take it personally.” He is going to miss her. Kim votes for Lex saying she figures he has so many votes against him from past TCs that this won’t hurt him and since she is probably going home tonight, it seemed like the best thing to do. Theresa votes for Lex because he is “a strong competitor.” “Still crazy about ya though.”

Smileeys

Tuesday, January 01, 2002 - 11:51 pm Click here to edit this post
Cool, Joan, Thanks - AGAIN!!!!!!! :)
Surprised they showed as much of Tom getting smashed as they did. What surprised me the most, though, was how nice Lex's words were when he voted for KimP.

By the way - IT'S SNNNOOOWWWWIIIINNNNNGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

(My saying I live in MISSISSIPPI should explain why I am so EXCITED!!!!!)

Sunshinemiss

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 12:24 am Click here to edit this post
Thanks Joan! I really look forward to these weekly updates. Appreciate it!

Tntitanfan

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 05:18 am Click here to edit this post
Joan, you are the bestest! Your reporting adds a whole other dimension to the game -

Peachie

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 09:02 am Click here to edit this post
Thanks Joan! You are terrific! Hope all had a nice New Years.

Knightpatti

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 12:37 pm Click here to edit this post
THanks alot Joan. I really appreciate your work. By the way, it snowed for a few minutes today in Myrtle Beach, SC, which is very rare.

Pamy

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 07:21 pm Click here to edit this post
Thanks Joan, you are the best!!!!
I got a little gift today from one of my co-workers, and you know why??? because i bring her your summaries every week!!!! you should be the one getting the gifts for all your hard work, all i do is print them!!!!!!!

Tksoard

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 08:22 pm Click here to edit this post
Great job again Joan, as always!!

Smileeys, SNOW IN MISSISSIPPI???? I miss it so much!! (originally from Mich. now in Tenn). We are going to get alittle this weekend. That will be enough to get me over missing it.

Joan

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 08:46 pm Click here to edit this post
LOL Pamy! That is awesome! I wondered if it was worth it to pay for the additional footage but from everyone's reactions here, it definitely was. :)

Wink

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 08:55 pm Click here to edit this post
Thanks for being such a trooper Joan. The end is in sight.

Urgrace

Wednesday, January 02, 2002 - 10:13 pm Click here to edit this post
Joan, we all know this is a lot of work, but it is the bestest!!! You are terrific!!! Thank you soooooo much.!!!!!