Bat In The Hat

The ClubHouse: Archives: Bat In The Hat

Lancecrossfire

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 08:49 am Click here to edit this post
“Bat In The Hat”

I like Bat.
I do not like the hat.
I do not like Bat in the hat.

I would not like it here or there,
I would not like it anywhere.
I would not like it on a lake,
I would not like it on my steak.
I would not like to see it on my lawn,
I would not like to see it at dark or dawn.

The hat is sad,
The hat is bad.
The hat should go away,
The hat should go today.
We should burn the hat and burn it now;
We should burn it then bury it with a plow.

Bat should not wear it to the store,
She should not wear it any more.
Bat should not wear it in the house,
She should not wear it with a blouse.
Bat should not wear it at the park,
She should not make a poor dog bark.
Bat should not wear it in a truck,
She should not give it to a duck.
Bat should not wear it here or there,
She should not wear it anywhere.
Bat should not give it to a bear,
She should not wear any underwear.

I will not, can not like the hat,
It will still suck whether I’m thin or fat.
The hat I truly do despise,
This should be no surprise.
The hat does suck it's plain to see;
Here, let me see it—I need to pee.

Please, please Bat,
I implore you to not wear the hat.

Oh Bat, oh Bat, tis’ just my luck,
That you just don’t give a flying f*ck.

You like the hat, I know not why,
You will like it till you die.
The hat, the hat, it’s sad to say,
As long as Bat is here, the hat will stay.

If and when I get the hat,
If and when I take it from Bat,
I will burn it fast and hot.
I will burn it in a lot.

I will burn it till its soot,
Then I’ll stomp it with my foot.
I will burn it till ash is in a pile,
Then I can finally, finally smile.

I do not, do not like the hat,
I do not, do not like it on Bat.

It’s now time for me to go,
I just needed for Bat to know;
The hat, the hat will grow,
It will sway to and fro.

I leave, yet Bat still has the hat,
She is truly Bat In The Hat.

Bat my friend, Bat my pal,
You are really quite a gal.

Digilady

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 09:01 am Click here to edit this post
Holy mither a gawwd.

ROFLMAOWMP!

Lance, that was a classic.

BWAHahhahahahah

Willi

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 09:03 am Click here to edit this post
LOL!

Love It!

Norwican

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 09:31 am Click here to edit this post
You've outdone yourself Lance ROFLMAO!
Thanks for the much needed laugh today :)

Flint

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 10:11 am Click here to edit this post
I bow before the hat master.

Grooch

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 11:07 am Click here to edit this post
LOL!

I would love to see the illustrations for this story!

Fruitbat

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 11:14 am Click here to edit this post
Very cute. :) I will WALK to your door with that damn hat. This cinches it.

Digi-WMP? at the end of ROFLMAO???

Digilady

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 11:15 am Click here to edit this post
Wetting My Pants!

<snark>

Seamonkey

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 01:11 pm Click here to edit this post
Lance! This made my day, so far :)

Wink

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 01:20 pm Click here to edit this post
Lance you rule, it's a rhyming jewel. Fantastic.

Moondance

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 03:05 pm Click here to edit this post
Lance, TOO much! That was great!

I love Bat
I love the Hat
I love Bat in the Hat!

Fruitbat

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 03:21 pm Click here to edit this post
:)

Merlin

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 03:37 pm Click here to edit this post
Thanks Lance.
I was in one of those less than pleasant moods until I laughed at this creation of yours. It made me smile and got rid of the funk.

Maire

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 03:47 pm Click here to edit this post
Well Lance, you really turned out a good one, I must say!!
Heh, I was trying so hard not to laugh while I read it earlier at the college library. I had to keep apologizing to the people around me, and one kid asked if I was alright because he thought I was crying!

Seamonkey

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 03:53 pm Click here to edit this post
And just try to explain about bats and hats

Lancecrossfire

Monday, April 09, 2001 - 04:23 pm Click here to edit this post
Thanks everyone. Merlin, glad to hear you got out of your funk.

Maire, keep those college kids guessing.

Grooch

Friday, April 27, 2001 - 01:07 pm Click here to edit this post
~Bump~

Tess

Friday, April 27, 2001 - 01:56 pm Click here to edit this post
Now that was funny. OMG!

Puttergirl

Friday, April 27, 2001 - 04:11 pm Click here to edit this post
Hilarious!!!

Flint

Friday, April 27, 2001 - 05:15 pm Click here to edit this post
I guess you could say: Our hats are off to you.

Fruitbat

Wednesday, May 02, 2001 - 12:44 am Click here to edit this post
Nice to come back and read that again. Very cute. Thanks.