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Eliz87
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 10:21 am
I thought it would be fun to start a thread like this for parents, as I was commenting yesterday to my husband that so many things happen during pregnancy and parenthood that you do NOT read in the "What To Expect" books! Here's a couple to start off with... #1 - As some of you may know, I've been having gallbladder attacks. I never had a problem until my baby was six months old. Could be coincidental, but I've since read that gallbladder problems are often brought on by pregnancy. #2 - My 14-month-old son loves to go outside and loves to go "bye-byes". However, it is like World War III around this house trying to get him dressed to go somewhere! He HATES putting his clothes on. I keep telling him that he should know if he wants to go somewhere he has to get dressed! I'm hoping SOME DAY he'll understand this. LOL
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Lumbele
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 1:08 pm
#3 - Morning sickness is not necessarily restricted to that part of the day. Some of us have 24 hour mornings.
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Bigd
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 4:57 pm
no one ever told me not to
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Ophiliasgrandma
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 5:00 pm
They never told me that insanity can be inherited from your children.
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Secretsmile
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 5:07 pm
No one ever told me that a child couldn't remember what time curfew is but could remember each and every time a sibling got a bigger slice of cake or a teaspoon more ice cream since what seems like before his conception.
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Mamie316
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 7:27 pm
They never told me how much sorer certain body areas would be the second time around. I could barely put my pant legs on. I had to sleep with a pillow between my legs. The doctor gave me this analogy...It's like you are a balloon that has been blown up already and are stretched out. Lovely!
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Squaredsc
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 7:54 pm
ditto what lumbele said. i had all day sickness with #1 but not with #2.
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Mamie316
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 8:08 pm
I didn't have morning sickness at all the first time but the second time, I was sick morning, noon and night for 4 months. I lost weight those months. It got to where even crackers made me sick. I would carry around water everywhere just so I would have something in my stomach. And then at 5 months, it completely stopped.
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Zachsmom
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 8:17 pm
The real and true meaning of unconditional love. There is no way to put it in words. They tell you what you 'may' experience during pregancy, labor and delivery, but NO ONE told me what happens the 2-3 weeks AFTER delivery. The postpartum emotions..YIKES! I would cry for no reason, then I would cry because I was crying for no reason. How fast little newborns get cold. My son was born Aug 1st and when he was 2 weeks old I was giving him a sponge bath, and his lips turned blue! I felt like such a rotten mother But mostly, they never explain about how the void in your heart that you never knew existed is filled with love the first time you touch them.
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Mamie316
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 8:27 pm
That is so true Zachsmom and let me tell you, my son is 21 and my daughter is 18 and that love grows more and more all the time. You can't believe that it can but it does.You know, you love your parents and siblings and love your husband, but there is no love like that for your children!
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Urgrace
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 11:56 pm
"If I had known grandchildren were so much fun I'd have had them first!" That quote makes me smile so much, because the love you have for your children goes double for grandchildren. Nobody told me you could really have a baby without any pain during labor. My doctor's eyes popped out of his head when he examined me (after 13 hours of trying to convince him over the phone I was in labor) and found me at 6cm. The baby was born one hour later. Morning sickness can last 24 hours a day and 9 months too. Nobody told me that Italian girls have the most beautiful skin that stretches without cracking into stretch marks! Nor did they tell me that Italian girls have their baby on their due date, and they shrink back to their exact before-baby size the day after the baby, which weighed 10 plus pounds, is born. I had to find that out while I was morning sick, stretch-marked, and trying to convince the doctor that I was in labor and having a baby NOW - two weeks early. My 100% Italian-American neighbor breezed in and out like the baby was just a sweat bead. Nobody told me that the doctor may not be a good seamstress.
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Mamie316
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 - 11:59 pm
lol Urgrace..I know all about the "good" seamstress part.
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Wargod
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 12:57 am
By the time you're ready to deliver you're baby, you're willing to let the janitor come in "and just check you our real quick" if it helps get the baby out even sooner! No matter how many people tell you that once you have your baby, instinct will kick in, there will still be times you need someone to show you how to do something or give you advice. I'm also firmly convinced that woman who says how wonderful pregnancy is has either never had children, or has completely blocked out nine months of puking, constant peeing, swollen feet, exhaustion, waddling, everyone in the world wanting to touch their belly, people telling them how big they are, muscle cramps in the oddest places, clumsiness, moodiness, weird food cravings, advice from everyone and their brother's uncle's grandmother (this one is especially fun if you spend large amounts of time around elderly people who think you should spend the entire pregnancy bedridden,)and after the first five or six months being uncomfortable no matter what you do, lol. That you could look at the filthiest, stickiest face, hair sticking up in 100 places, filthy clothes, and think they're the cutest kids ever. That your child can do something that makes you prouder than you've ever been and are positive you can never be prouder, and then turn around and make you even prouder. No matter how hard you think raising children will be, it will be even harder. You feel every hurt, slight, and illness your kid does, you worry constantly about them and how you're doing, if you're teaching the right things the right ways, and if you've managed to pass along the lessons and morals that are most important to you. Most of all, you get to expereince everything like its the first time all over again...chasing a butterfly in the front yard, learning that pots and pans make big fun noises, finally feeling the sense of accomplishment being able to do something new the first time, what it's like to see the world through young excited eyes.
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Sisalou
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 4:51 am
All of these posts are so beautiful. I'm getting weepy. Quote from Zmom" "But mostly, they never explain about how the void in your heart that you never knew existed is filled with love the first time you touch them." This is so true! I just thought I knew what love was until I held my baby for the first time. When I was pregnant with my 2nd baby I couldn't imagine loving another person as much as I loved my first child. Then when 2nd child was born I couldn't imagine that I ever lived without her.
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Ddr1135
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 5:09 am
They never tell you that you'll always have a stain on your shirt from spilling while trying to eat or was it just me? I was the clumsiest eater when I was pregnant. And my morning sickness lasted 9 months. Always read the chapter on c-sections. When they told me I had to have a section, I started crying and saying "But I didn't read that chapter!". In my mind, I was a healthy farm girl who would spit that baby out. Ha Ha! It didn't work out that way. And you love like you've never loved before.
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Eliz87
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 7:43 am
Zmom, I agree soooo much. When I first got married, I really didn't care one way or the other if we had children. Being an only child and never having had any real experience with children, I could take them or leave them. Well, I got pregnant three months after we were married and now that I have my son, I can't remember what the heck I ever did without him! I needed him more than I ever knew. Oh, another thing about pregnancy...both times, I've been prone to choking on liquid. It just goes down the wrong way more often than when I'm not pregnant.
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Squaredsc
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 7:44 am
lol ddr, i had 2 of them.
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Bronxie
| Monday, November 10, 2003 - 7:54 am
It's been so long....and a lot has changed: Fashionable maternity clothes, new, improved pain relievers and Dad's assisting during birth. Some things haven't: The baby's reality replacing all vestages of pain; the mixed feelings of love, accomplishment, pride and family togetherness; reliance on Dr.Spock (or whomever is the baby guru today); pure, focused love and responsibility of another; and the realization you are part of the greatest creation of man. Grace, my dearest, closest friend today is my granddaughter.... and the nurses called my stitches, "French embroidery", I sat on a child's swimming tube for weeks.
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Admin
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 7:06 pm
Noboby ever told me... diapers don't work very good kids touch everything, including what's in their diapers diapers are expensive cotton diapers are much much better, and cheaper kids climb onto everything including the coffee table, back of the couch and railings I would need 2 diaper bags, 3 strollers, 4 car seats, 10 huge rubbermaid bins to store clothes that don't fit any longer, a huge basement to store toys, baby items, car seats, strollers etc., and a dedicated playroom there's a secret club of people called PARENTS and now that I'm a part of it, I just have to look at another parent and we know what each other is thinking, and we have this understanding that you will never have until you're a parent. Nobody ever told me I would be amazed watching my son grow. Nobody told me the huge responsibility I have is not changing his diapers and feeding him, but being a role model because he watches everything I do and copies everything I do, that's the biggest job.
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Danzdol
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 8:34 pm
I am still very bitter about this one. I was a very book/internet/opinion ready mom to be. Read every book, visited every site and heard everyone's opinion and not once, not even close did anyone ever tell me the following: Noone ever told me that when they said the week before I was due "Let's check you to see if you have dialated" they really meant "let's stick my hand in so far that you will actually feel violated and want to scream and hey, maybe this gets you ready for the delivery! I was a c-section mommy so that to me was the most horrible part of the process. On labor day, every hour someone would come in and whisper that magical phrase and I just wanted to run far, far away. NO BOOK I READ EVER MENTIONED THAT!

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Danzdol
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 8:36 pm
On a happier note Everyone told me that I would love this baby like I have loved nothing before but it's not something you hear and understand. You actually have to experience it. Words cannot express the love you have for your children properly. Words cannot do motherhood any justice! Does that make sense?
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Mamie316
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 8:43 pm
You are exactly right. You can be told how much you will love your child but you have no idea the depth of it until you have them. It is the most amazing thing that God has created...the bond between a mother and her children.
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Not1worry
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 9:10 pm
Nobody told me the maternity clothes that you thought were so cute and fashionable at 4 1/2 months - you will loathe the very sight of them by the 9th month. I STILL remember this brown velour shirt that I wore soooo much. I do remember someone telling me here is a reason disposable diapers were invented. I just had to learn it for myself. Nothing against the people who can make cloth diapers work for them. They didn't work for me. Baby pees in Pampers, stays asleep. Baby pees in cloth, cloth gets cold, Baby wakes up and screams. Nobody told me a battery operated, top opening swing is GOLD. I would not have had time to get a shower or eat breakfast without one of these. Nobody told me that for every doctor, nurse, anesthetist, clerk, etc. in the delivery room, they'd have 2 students with them. There were easily 18 people watching me deliver. Nobody told me how scary it would seem to go to the bathroom hours after giving birth. My hospital didn't allow you to leave the recovery ward until you'd "voided". Nobody told me my doctor would look like Doogie Howser. He wasn't actually younger than me, but he looked about 17, not giving me any confidence at all. I remember yelling at him as he was stitching me up "What are you using, a knitting needle?"
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Admin
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 9:22 pm
hehe.. Okay, I confess...you're right about the disposables at nighttime..good call! I have my own delivery room stories, did ya know? Nobody, not even the pre-natal class instructor, told me that at one point those 18 interns and doctors would leave the room and it would be just Enbwife and I for a while, pushing, screaming, holding the legs up, chanting the breathing techniques...you get the picture. That was scary! I felt like Dr.Admin! And one more thing, nobody ever told me not to mess with the nap schedule. Oh the Nap Schedule..it's so important! I learned the hard way. I am now a firm believer in the schedule..it's of utmost importance now!
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Twiggyish
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 - 9:23 pm
Yup, naps make a world of difference!! =)
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