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Spitfire
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 8:54 am
Bump!! I just came across this thread and thought it could use a bump. I am at 11 weeks right now and am not oblivious to the fact that it's not all peaches and cream. I actually get quite a kick out of all the "things they don't tell you" because it's real too. I am not the research type of person and really enjoy others stories and experiences and thought maybe we could keep them coming.
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Midlifer
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 9:04 am
A list of "what I didn't know" could take up this entire thread. Having said that: My 20 and 24 year olds bring me much joy. Just when I thought that I might be sent to prison for what I wanted to do to my 20 year old when she was 15-18 years old, she (and I) outgrew it. She just went back to college after her Winter Break, and I miss her. My 24 year old and her new husband just sent me flowers today for my birthday. It just doesn't get any better than that. Makes up for all of those years of cleaning baby poo and vomit.
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Sillycalimomma
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 9:41 am
I could write in here all day long, but just sticking to pregnancy and labor for now-no one ever told me that a million people would swarm into the delivery room literally at the very last minute! I even had a guy in plain clothes in there! After baby was born and I had a moment to think I asked the nurse who that man was-turns out he was the "recorder" took all the crucial notes for the chart. Sure did freak me out though while I was in labor! I thought they just let someone wander in from in the hall!! Also, this didn't happen with me probably because I had a natural childbirth, but I have witnessed two births where the mothers had an epidural and in both the doctors asked the mother to cough in order to isolate certain muscles and get that baby out! The looks on mom to be's face when the doctor yells "cough" out of nowhere, complete disbalief.....
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Kimmo
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 12:24 pm
Spitfire, since you are early on, I just want to say how eating lots of protein (I mean even over the doctor-recommended amounts) was the best thing I did for myself. Not only is that the most important for baby's brain- and body-building (the main reason I really ramped it up), but it eliminated any queasiness I may have had when I was pregnant. I'd get queasy any time I had too many carbs (especially cereals)-- Eating protein first and eating the carbs after (not together) really helped. Though "they" say carb-y crackers help with morning sickness! So, maybe that's just me. Then at the very end of my pregnancy, I retained so much water-- My legs and feet would get completely swollen. My midwife told me more protein (over my usual 80g/day) should make the swelling go down, and it did. At times I was going up to 120g a day, but that was by forcing myself to eat disgusting protein bars and protein shakes on top of regular protein foods-- Yuck. Protein bars taste horrible and are hard to chew. I did a lot of research before even buying one bar, and even "the best" bars were like chewing rubber.
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Sillycalimomma
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 12:48 pm
Oh, that reminds me of another thing! Don't overdue it on the dairy products! When I was five months pregnant I experienced a lot of pain in my back to the point where I was couldn't do anything but lay on the ground curled up in a ball. I went to the ER thinking I was losing the baby. After many test they determined that what I had was kidney stones! The doctor said it was not common, but that it was probably brought on by my diet and eating too much dairy. I was on a cheese and chocolate milkshake kick then so I guess that is what did it. The worst part of course is that being pregnant I couldn't take any pain meds. I just had to wait it out-for three days!
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Kimmo
| Wednesday, January 14, 2004 - 1:51 pm
Kidney stones-- Yuck. My stepmother has those and she can't have *anything* with calcium, to avoid kidney stones.
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Awareinva
| Thursday, January 15, 2004 - 10:48 am
Speaking from recent experience.... Gestational diabetes can develop much earlier than the doctors will believe. If you are experiencing symptoms (extreme thirst is the best one since the peeing every two minutes is normal to pregnancy ) insist on a test to catch it early. Gotta agree with Kimmo about the carbs and morning sickness. Was sick all 9 months with my first two and extremely sick with this one until the diabetes diagnosis forced me to cut out most sugar and watch the carbs. Morning sickness disappeared almost immediately. Makes me think I caused it the first two times because I definitely have a sweet tooth! And yes, get used to everyone (I mean everyone!) seeing things only your SO has seen since you were a baby!!! I still remember seeing my FIL in the room and being half uncovered with my first child- thinking "OMG someone please pull up that sheet- he can't see that!!! " LOL
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Kimmo
| Thursday, January 15, 2004 - 10:57 am
Aware, glad to hear you were the same with the carbs, too! Replacing those with protein wasn't a problem for me because I'm a protein junkie-- Any meats (except hot dogs, of course), eggs (I'd eat 3 or 4 a day), cheese, yogurt, milk, nuts (esp. almonds)-- Loved it! Ugh-- When I was "planning" (ha, ha) the labor, I decided to only have my DH and twin sister there-- They have seen me at my very worst and I didn't want anyone else to see me in that condition! My stepmother kept asking to be a part of it, forcing me to just say no-- But if you feel strongly about who you want to be there, don't compromise! When my stepsister had her baby this week, my dad was in and out at very graphic moments-- I would never have my dad in there! Eh. But she had two co-workers, her stepmother, and her mom there as well. Oh-- And if you do write up a "birth plan" (ha, ha, ha), make sure your midwife/ practitioner actually reads it during one of your checkups prior to the birth. I gave it to my midwife a couple weeks before I was due and just assumed she would read it (just a little bit) later. She actually didn't get around to reading the whole thing until after the baby was born (I think she was carrying it with her and just glancing over it as the labor progressed), and then she apologized for not doing everything that was in the plan. Of course, I didn't really care by that time because I was so relieved that the whole thing was over! 
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Tabbyking
| Thursday, January 15, 2004 - 11:30 am
no one told me that after a 41 hour long labor and a c-section, my next one would be 93+ hours long with a c-section. i was in labor so long, my dd had to wait another year to go to kindergarten LOLOL (before it changed, the last date you could enter kindergarten was if you would turn 5 by midnight on dec. 2....i went into labor with dd at 11:00 p.m. on dec.1 and was sectioned at 8:40 p.m. on dec 4. who woulda thought i couldn't get that baby out in 25 hours?
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Happymom
| Thursday, January 15, 2004 - 12:27 pm
I'm LOL about Admin and posting in a baby thread and about the nap schedule!!!! I'm also LOL about yet another hair mishap with you Tabby! No one ever told me that the pushing hurt so badly. I kept hearing that pushing would be a relief etc. No way. I hated it. It was awful with my first two children. I had an epidural with the 3rd, that wasn't so bad. No one ever told me that you can forget how to push. With my first, no problem. The urge to push was definitly present. Not so with my second...and I was even dialated to 10 and still had no urge to push. The nurse had to talk me through it. (Baby was curled up and floating way up high. When she was born the Dr. thought maybe she was 7 lb 0 oz, she was 8 lb 10 oz!) No one told me that nursing would cause milk to squirt out across the room even when not nursing at the moment. I had to constantly wash the milk off the shower walls. I wish I'd known so I could've bought nursing pads before the birth. No one told me how silly and wonderful the baby looks after the first feeding when the mild comes in (around day 3)...all 3 of my daughters looked pleasantly drunk! No one told me how repulsive all food would be except for plain lettuce and celery. Had morning sickness all day for many mos. with all 3, 2nd pregnancy worse than the first, and third worse than the second. No one told me how horrible the blood sugar test drink is, especially on an empty stomach. People told me, but I couldn't understand how much, how powerfully I love my children...how profoundly happy I am seeing them grow and how profoundly sad I am that they leave infanthood, toddlerhood, and childhood behind. I really miss them and look forward to every moment they grow up. Hard to explain.
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Tabbyking
| Thursday, January 15, 2004 - 12:48 pm
i know i have posted something along these lines elsewhere, but i still believe in the '3rds'... i knew when my son was born, i would only get him at home for 18 years, because there was no way he wasn't going to college. the first 1/3 of that time, he was inquisitive, delightful, loving, and raced around all day to make sure he could get to everything he wanted before bedtime. sometimes he would fall asleep in the doorway to his room--he was to exhausted to even make it to his bed! i was mad at God, that one-third of my time with this wonderful child was going by so fast. from age 6 to 12, he had more things outside the family to do. friends from school, lots of homework, sleep-overs, baseball camp, sports. i figured it was God's way of helping us let go slowly...for the time my son would be away from home permanently. i was sad because this stage went by so fast, too. then he became a teenager and although he only got into 2 small 'troubles'--throwing one egg on halloween (got caught, good!); and stealing a 25- cent chicken nugget off the brunch cart at school (also got caught, good!, proving to him that you cannot get away with ANYTHING, and he never tried anything since. both times he did something 'wrong', he got caught, so i know he realized for sure that all adults really DO have eyes in the back of their heads! plus, one happened on oct 31 and the other nov 1, the very next day!) however, as his parents we were now 'stupid', 'retarded', 'out of it', and his mouth was just constantly going without his brain being engaged. the year he was 14 lasted about 20,000 years, give or take a century or two. i knew God was making it easy for me to say, "go! time to live your life as a grown ass man. you're 18 now!" but, yep, i love my children powerfully and it is sad to see them leave their childhood behind. and i still was sad when he went off to college, even though i was also proud and glad his mouth went with him! (although it was nowhere near as bad as when he was 14!)
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Texasdeb
| Friday, January 16, 2004 - 6:02 pm
Well put Tabby. My youngest & only boy is 18 now & I am finally starting to see a "for real" human being in him. Boy, you sure discribed the 3 stages of childhood (I only related this to my son though - the 2 girls would be a whole other story).
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Tabbyking
| Friday, January 16, 2004 - 6:22 pm
knock on wood, but dd is 16 and every parent's dream--almost straight A's, was valedictorian of her junior high school, was on the board at habitat for humanity at age 15, has donated almost 200 hours of saturday mornings to building their latest homes, is chairing a relay for life team, is loving and considerate, calls me 'mamas' and still snuggles on the couch with me. she loves to cook and volunteer and has had maybe 3 crabby days in her entire life...each of them within 24 hours of getting very sick with the flu or a bad cold. i wish everyone could have my dd for a while!
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Gigglesalot
Member
08-14-2003
| Thursday, February 12, 2004 - 3:44 pm
Bump - I'm not a parent nor pregnant but wanted my friend who is to find this thread easily. Take care all! 
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Vsmart
Member
02-10-2003
| Saturday, February 14, 2004 - 10:31 pm
When I came to the hospital, I told the dr. that it felt like the last 15 minutes of delivering the first boy. Dr looked & said that I'ld be there a long time because I was only 4 cm. He went out for a sandwich. So I popped out David a few minutes later all by myself. DH had to find a nurse. Bad tear & worse stitching. Hurt to pee for a week. [Dr made straight cut with Peter, so it healed perfectly].
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Vsmart
Member
02-10-2003
| Saturday, February 14, 2004 - 10:36 pm
DH gave me a very interesting book. I only read it while I nursed. Then I didn't mind being awaken so many times during the night.
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Kimmo
Member
05-02-2003
| Sunday, February 15, 2004 - 3:13 am
Vsmart, I also got a lot of reading done while nursing, once I got the hang of it and didn't feel like DS would roll off of me-- The nursing pillow made a good baby *and* book holder! 
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Enbwife
Member
08-14-2000
| Monday, February 16, 2004 - 12:43 pm
Wow! I just discovered this thread. I always post in the New Parents To Be area in the Community Corner - a great place to go if you're expecting. No one ever told me how much attention I would get when I was pregnant and how special I would feel. No one ever told me how painful nursing could be and that some babies will absolutely refuse a bottle or soother. No one ever told me how you can never prepare for sleep deprivation and how absolutely insane it can make you. No one ever told me I could love this little baby so much, but at times, have terrible thoughts in the middle of a sleepless night that would terrify me!! No one ever told me that I would cry at the drop of a hat (to this day) when he would do amazing things that just brightened my day instantly. No one ever told me how much I would love being a mommy. 
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Eliz87
Member
07-30-2001
| Monday, February 16, 2004 - 1:33 pm
It's the little things that count for me and I think all mothers. Here's some examples of what my 18-month-old has done recently... Yesterday at the dinner table, he was watching my husband and as he was eating, picked up his napkin, wiped his mouth off, and set it down gently. So sweet. He likes to sneak on my computer chair (he knows he's not allowed, but he does it). One day I walked in and there he was, standing on the chair, playing with the computer, with his sippy cup right beside the keyboard -- right where I put my beverage. When I start dinner, that's when he starts opening and closing the cupboard doors. "Helping." The open-mouthed "kissies" that he gives out of the blue and how he loves to be tickled -- on his terms!! :-) He also likes to tickle me when I'm laying on the couch. I don't know who laughs more -- him or me! When he gets to go "bye bye", he comes over and sits down on my lap to get his shoes on. He's learned that. Every day there's something new. It's really amazing how fast they learn. If you're not a mom yet, you won't believe how these seemingly little things they do bring absolute joy to each day.
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Enbwife
Member
08-14-2000
| Monday, February 23, 2004 - 12:54 pm
Absolutely! Nate copies everything we do and loves to do "cheers" with his juice. He watches Neil then imitates him. It's the most adorable thing.
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Eliz87
Member
07-30-2001
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 11:33 am
Last night was a rough night for us. My 9-week-old wouldn't stop crying. Poor little thing was constipated and that's so painful for a baby. And, in the midst of trying to calm him down, my 20-month old was in his crib screaming. He's in the process of cutting another tooth, and the ones that come in at this stage just seem so much harder to cut than the ones that come in around the age of six months or so (in his case at least). Of course, it didn't help matters that he heard his little brother crying too. My husband is working in New York (we're all relocating there on May 10th, thank God), so there was no one here to help me. I was so flustered!! This was actually the first time that they were both crying at once in the middle of night. I've not had any good sleep since my husband has been away since the beginning of March. He drives home on the weekends, but we're so busy trying to get things done preparing for our move and me trying to catch up on things I couldn't get to during the week that I can never quite get caught up on my sleep. Anyhow, that was the situation last night -- two upset babies with a sleep-deprived mother (and may I add, premenstrual). Not a good combination! I actually had to separate myself from them for one or two minutes. I'm sure everyone has had those times -- I was getting too worked up and had to be away from them for a minute and take some deep breaths, etc. Well, after I calmed myself down (which is so important when caring for children, because they definitely sense otherwise), I was able to make my infant happy by putting him in his swing (he LOVES his swing), and then I got my toddler up and gave him a little Tylenol and some ice chips to suck on to make his mouth feel a little better. An hour later, all was well and both of them were sound asleep! WHEW!! LOL Anyhow, just about a half hour ago, Tommy had just finished his lunch and I had just finished giving Jason his bottle, and I was thinking once again how precious they both are to me. My God I love them fiercely!!! It's overpowering sometimes really. Sometimes I can't believe how much I've been blessed to have these two little guys in my care. And after a night like last night, with me getting so frustrated, and then today with Tommy happily playing and content, and Jason gurgling and cooing at me...I don't know...it just created such a mix of strong feelings (love, happiness, guilt, doubt, hope, all wrapped up into one) that I just needed to share. I chose this thread for the other moms who have "been there done that" and also for the mommies-to-be to emphasize how no one will ever be able to prepare you for the strong range of emotions you will experience at times.
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Kaykay
Member
01-21-2004
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 12:19 pm
Holy crow Eliz87, I has a VERY similar experince with my two kiddlet last year. It is still very fresh in my mind. The range of emotions that we can feel in a matter of 6 hrs is amazing!!! Breathing deep is the best way for me to keep control. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one out here that feels like this. Somedays (after work - i work full time) I come home with my 4 and 2 yrs olds and they are needy and I feel like I can't give them enough of me. That is a tough emotion to deal with but I do my best and I know they love me as much as I love them. (sorry for the long post but the words just kept coming!!)
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Spitfire
Member
07-18-2002
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 12:37 pm
Eliz87 thanks for your story. I have heard these types of stories before but I never get tired of hearing about the love of a mommy. I know it's not easy and it's not always the way you want it to be but it's oh so worth it. Thanks from a mommy-to-be!! (26 weeks and counting)
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Kaykay
Member
01-21-2004
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 12:42 pm
YIPPIE SPITFIRE - That is VERY exciting. I hope you are feeling good 
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Eliz87
Member
07-30-2001
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 12:47 pm
Congratulations! Do you know whether you are having a boy or a girl? What names are you considering (I always love talking about that!)?
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Spitfire
Member
07-18-2002
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 1:16 pm
Thanks Kaykay and Eliz87. I really am feeling fine with the pregnancy but am having some issues with Carpel Tunnel. I posted about it in the other thread if you are interested. I don't know if it's boy or girl. We decided to be surprised and as soon as we left we wanted to know soooo bad!! We always said we would not want to know but then after you see the little peanut on the monitor you want to know what your dealing with!! I was thinking about starting a thread dedicated to picking names but didn't know if it would go over well. Right now for a boy we like Wyatt or Sam. My mom's name is Sandy and my Grandpa always called her Sam so it would be in his honour. As for a girl I have many possibilities....to many really, I need to narrow it down but nothing has jumped at me yet like Sam did. Here goes...Gabriella/Ella, Abigail/Abby, Emma, Sam, Avery, Kalli, Ava, Julia, Halle....got any suggestions. In my mind I have not decided because it's just not right yet.
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Eliz87
Member
07-30-2001
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 1:22 pm
Oh you should start the thread, if not for anything else then for a poll. (I like Sam by the way for a boy! I was going to go with the name Leah if I had a girl, or maybe Nicole. I couldn't decide. Thankfully I had a boy so it was easy.) Anyway, a "Name Spitfire's Baby" thread would be fun! And yes, after I posted, I remembered your posting the other day about your Carpal Tunnel. That is such a bummer. There are so many small things that can irritate a woman physically during pregnancy. I had the worst heartburn every single day. Even iced tea gave me heartburn (more like an acidy sensation I guess). It instantly went away when I delivered. But it was miserable. And I'm not even going to mention the swollen feet! ACK! I'm sure your Carpal Tunnel will be a distant memory by the time your baby's first birthday rolls around. :-)
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Spitfire
Member
07-18-2002
| Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 1:38 pm
OK Eliz it's started. 
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