Archive through September 29, 2003
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TV ClubHouse: Archive: I'm in shock (A Dear Abby type scenerio): Archive through September 29, 2003

Julieboo

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 09:27 am EditMoveDeleteIP
I have a cat named Frosty who likes to escape. He is mostly an indoor cat, but he slips through the door a lot lately. (Especially cuz I have a 4 year old always opening the door.)

I also have a very nosey Gladys Kravitz type neighbor ('cept it's a guy in his 50's, who stays at home. He's a recovering alcoholic with some anxiety type problems so he doesn't venture off our street very often.) Now I (til now, that is) always liked this guy. He is kind of like the sheriff of our street. He makes sure people bring up their garbage cans and recycling bins, and stuff like that. He has a history of irritating the neighbors, but it never bothered me. I always felt a little safer having him "stand guard". Though sometiems he has overstepped his boundaries like when he threatened one neighbor kid that he'd call the police if he saw her riding her motorized scooter on our street.

Well, cut to today, I pull in my driveway and he comes up with a roll of film. He tells me he is about to get it developed. He has taken several pictures of my cat in mischief (in on neighbor's garbage, in another's garden, etc...) He told me if I found that cat missing, I would know why. He told me some of the neighbors want to shoot the cat and some want to trap him.

Well I didn't say much. I am in shock.. Needless to say. I guess I'll keep Frosty locked in a room upstairs for a while. I am just blown away by this.

Any opinions? I'm not sure even why I am posting this, except maybe to vent. I feel like someone punched me. I haven't felt like this since I got laid off of my job. Am I overreacting? Anyone got a chill pill for me?

Eliz87

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 09:39 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Oh, Julie, that's horrible. I've had evil neighbors like this.

The only thing you can do is to keep the cat inside, but I know that's so hard to do with a cat who is used to roaming. And, no, you're not overreacting -- you must protect your cat. The evil neighbors that I spoke of actually left poisoned food out for the neighborhood animals, so you have to keep Frosty on your property somehow.

Perhaps you could put a leash on him or her and take it outside? Or, do you have a way of fencing the cat in somewhere in your yard?

Gosh, I hate that you're going through this. People are so mean sometimes. :-(

Julieboo

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 09:46 am EditMoveDeleteIP
One thing that really threw me is that the neighbor had the "guts" to come up to me face to face to threaten me like that. I mean, why couldn't he have said "hey your cat is causing some problems", then give me a chance. I mean if I had any idea that Frosty was doing anything other than hiding in our bushes, then I would for sure make sure I could do what I can to make sure he stays inside. Maybe I should give him (neighbor) credit for at least the warning--however nasty the warning was...

Lucy

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 09:47 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Julie, I'm sorry to hear that your neighbor is being such a jerk. Maybe you should file a complaint with your local animal control office just to have it on record that he threatened you. As difficult as it may be to keep Frosty in the house, I really think it's a good idea. The other neighbors should probably be told that this neighbor has really crossed the line, too.

Hugs to you and Frosty, and no, you're not overreacting at all.

Max

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 09:57 am EditMoveDeleteIP
As far as I'm aware, there are no communities where it's unlawful to let your cat roam the neighborhood. Some communities require cats to be licensed, but there aren't leash laws as there are with dogs.

If your neighbor is threatening to harm your cat, then you have a serious problem. He needs to be told that, should your cat disappear or be harmed in any way, the police will be paying him a visit. Since he is so quick to threaten police action against others, perhaps he needs a bit of a wake-up call himself.

Don't know how big your community is, but you might want to consider walking into the nearest police substation or precinct or whatever the lingo is in your neck of the woods and having a conversation with an officer about the situation. If you're in a big city, this probably wouldn't work, but if you are in an area where there is a community policing program, there's a chance the officer will be willing to go have a "friendly chat" with the neighbor.

The concern I would have is that his obsessive behavior is beginning to turn to threatening actions. If it stats with neighborhood pets, it might turn to neighborhood children next. He needs a wake up call now.

I know what you mean about liking the fact that he keeps such a close eye on things. I had a neighbor like that once, but he wasn't obsessive or dealing with anxiety issues, he was just a busy-body. Very nice guy, though, and he definitely knew everything that was going on in our cul-de-sac! :)

Anyway, you shouldn't need to live in fear. Sounds like Frosty is just plain old being a cat and there's nothing wrong with that.

Grooch

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 10:01 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Julieboo, maybe you can put one of those child gates that keeps kids out of rooms in front of the door so he can't slip out, or put a chain lock up high so the kid can only open the door a few inches?

Anyway, I would tell him that I want to see the pictures when they actually get developed. (Maybe it's not even your cat or wasn't really doing the things he said he did. I would also want to be told what neighbors complained so that you can go tlk to them directly and see if they really do have a problem w/ your cat and if something could be worked out.

Then I would have a big burly male friend call up the neighbor and tell him that if Frosty ends up missing, he might end up sleeping with the fishes very soon.

Julieboo

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 10:33 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Thanks guys A LOT! But can you f---ing believe it (and RARELY do I swear!) I just let the dang cat out! I can't f'n believe it. I saw my across teh street neoghbor talking to some kids and wanted to ask him about Frosty (as the jerk neighbor brought the across the st. neighbor into the stopry) anyways I was gonna run across and ask him about the cat, when zoom, Frosty darts out. I spend 10 min. trying my damndest to get him and now he is totally gone...

Tabbyking

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 11:19 am EditMoveDeleteIP
max is right....i even remember a 'people's court' many years ago where someone was suing over a roaming cat and the judge said cats cannot be considered 'domesticated' as a dog can, and they roam. period. i would call the non-emergency police number and talk with someone.
i will tell you that usually it's the one neighbor who is a problem. they will tell you that 'all the neighbors' are upset about this or that, but when my gladys kravits of the purple house and yard ornaments told us 'all the neighbors' hated our banana trees, it was just her.
we happen to have an indoor cat, but we also have an outdoor cat. (we had 2, but one was killed by the neighbor's unleashed dog about 2 months ago.)
i would call someone just to document. you might talk with your neighbors and tell them if they see your cat doing its duty on their lawn, or lying in their flowers and smashing them down (or whatever your cat is supposedly doing!) to please call and you will pick it up, etc., but i think the guy is just being a jerk.

Jagger

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 11:32 am EditMoveDeleteIP
The guy threatening to eliminate your cat is not right, but in some states and cities there are rules about cats running loose. In the city that I live in you have the same responsibilities with a cat as you do a dog. Must be leashed, licienced and or on your property.

I have had numerous problems with the neighborhood cats getting into the garbage, the compost bin, the flower beds, the garden. Finding dead birds, baby rabbits, squirrels, etc laying around in my yard from the neighbors cats, so I can understand why someone would be upset about a cat running loose in the neighborhood. But I also think it would have been much nicer of the neighbor to address the issue with you before making rude comments or threats.

Pcakes2

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 11:48 am EditMoveDeleteIP
The threat is unbelievable. I would report the incident, and make it be taken seriously. On another note, I live in a neighborhood with several cat owners, and I have had my garden and flower beds ruined time and time again. I approached one neighbor (I knew that cat belonged to them as I video taped the cat then followed it home), and asked for compensation...they basically told me to F***Off.

Not1worry

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 12:02 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Julie, I'm sorry you had to deal with such a rude incident! From reading all these posts it seems like the best ideas are:

1. Report it officially to someone. Animal control or the police. This really should be documented. This man sounds as though he's on a power trip and maybe reporting it will make him back off a bit.

2. Talk to the other neighbors and find out if it really is a problem. Ask them to please let you know as soon as possible when the cat messes something up.

3. Enlist the 4 yr. old's help in keeping Frosty inside. Tell him/her that Frosty needs help and he's got to be a watchdog for Frosty. Frosty goes outside and gets in trouble, so he has to help him be good.

Hugs to you and Frosty.

Juju2bigdog

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 02:24 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
I like all of Not1worry's suggestions. Julieboo, if you can get a police agency or animal control agency to take a report, I would do it, just to get the implied threat on record. Depending on what else is going on in your town, you may not be able to get anybody to take a report. As an alternative, you could print out this thread and just put it away somewhere in case something happens to Frosty. You DID report it here, and that actually might have some credence if you need to take some action in the future.

Curiouscat

Thursday, September 25, 2003 - 04:07 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Here are my city's by-laws regarding cats:

Why are there animal by-laws?

Laws protect people. They also protect pets. Although many people feel that owning a pet is an individual's right, some animals cause problems and have to be regulated. The laws described here have been designed to provide better health and safety for the public.

Cat Identification Tags

Similar to the requirement for dogs, all cats in London must be registered and wear a tag and there is a limit of 2 cats. Identification costs depend only on whether the cat has been spayed or neutered.

Cats not permitted to Trespass

Cats are not permitted to trespass or be at large. This means cat owners must either have an indoor cat or must restrict a cat from leaving the owner's property.

Stray Dogs and Cats

Every citizen has the right to pick up a stray dog or cat and have it impounded by London Animal Care Centre. Strays are sheltered at the shelter at 121 Pine Valley Blvd. Stray pets may be reclaimed by an owner with proper payment of the redemption fee. Redemption fees cover impound charges and board (for every day including any part of a day). All pets not claimed within 72 hours of impoundment become the custodial property of London ACC. Our expert staff screens all unclaimed pets beyond the redemption period for temperament and health. Approved candidates are placed up for adoption where potential adoptees are also screened through an interview process.

Julieboo

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 07:04 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Thanks everyone. I found out there is an ordinance in our town that says you cannot have roaming cats. The irony is that is is no real penalty! But the police dept says if he gets out, I am supposed to call them so they can help me find the cat! (Too funny if ya ask me!)

This morning I was going down the street and Mr. Meany waved me over. I hesitated, but did it anyways. He totally apologized-over and over.Then when I came back down the street he came over and continued apologizing. To the point of it being irritating. I still think he is a bit of a creep, but do feel better now.

I really appreciate all of your input, I was really shaken up yesterday over this and reading your posts really did help! SO thank you for your time.

Lucy

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 08:24 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Julie, I feel much better knowing that Mr. Meany apologized to you...I hope he told you that he would never harm Frosty. This guy is clearly an odd one! Maybe he'll move!!

Curiouscat

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 05:23 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Don't write your neighbour off, Julie, please. If he is such a person to keep an eye on things, he may be the one some day who will keep your young child from harm. In his own strange way he may have just been warning you about something that could happen with your kitty that your other neighbours wouldn't come to you directly and say something honestly face-to-face.

Whoami

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 05:28 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Did Frosty come back yet Juliboo?

Caycaye

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 05:54 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Hey Julie...I, TOO, am an animal lover to the extreme. I have never been able to own a cat, because my husband is an animal HATER it seems. I had to wait for 13 years of marriage before he allowed me to own a dog. Well...needless to say, I own three now. My husband only really interacts with one though. He hates cats. Anyway, my sister and her 6 yr. old daughter live next door in our garage apartment. When my sister moved in, I knew she had a cat, but she ASSURED me and I assured my husband that it was an indoor cat. I didn't realize at the time, but MANY cat owners (my sister, especially), consider an indoor cat as a cat that lives MOSTLY in the house, but escapes atleast daily and roams for atleast a few hours in the morning and at night, sometimes all night.

How do I know this? Well...her cat has dug up so many of my flowers, and the mulch is messed up from her covering her poop. It seems every morning when my husband goes to work, he notices a new "spot" where Skye has scratched and destroyed. Also, she has slept on top of my grown son's new car, and puts muddy footprints all over the hood. My son gets LIVID! She has gotten into my husband's jeep at night and urinated on the seats. I could go on and on...I LOVE my sister, and so does my whole family. I love Skye, but my husband wants to trap it and haul it off to the pound, unbeknownst to my sister. I will NOT let that happen. But every time I approach my sister about it, she whines..."I TRY to keep her in, but she escapes..." That is really not good enough or responsible enough. What do I do??? I am in the middle. My only answer, as I have told my husband AND my sister.....LOOK...my husband has to chill out and stop getting so angry that every little infraction sends him through the roof, but mostly my sister has GOT to become responsible for her cat, and do more than just TRY....or get rid of her cat. The other neighbors (who have known me for many more years than they know my sister) have actually gossiped about how TERRIBLE my sister is in front of me. They are all sick of her cat, but don't want to be a nasty neighbor, so they basically want ME to handle it. Her cat has wreaked havoc on everyone's yard at one time or another....You may not realize it, but a cat can do a lot of damage in a yard or vehicle in one night. Well...I haven't gotten anywhere with my sister so far (3 years) and so I imagine ANY neighbor could get totally FRUSTRATED. Please excuse your neighbor...he may have caught you on one of those mornings when your cat was particularly mischievous and he blew his cork. (Not proper, but really understandable)

So, if I have an opinion, it is that you really should examine your habits with responsiblity for your cat, and REALLY try to be a "good" neighbor...If the cat gets out now and then, they will understand, just not everyday. Your garden never has a chance to catch up.

Julieboo

Friday, September 26, 2003 - 06:12 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Oh, sorry, I shoulda posted earlier that he (Frosty) came back within the hour of his departure. I'm doing what I can to secure him.

We have 2 other cats that don't care about the outdoors and 2 dogs. Frosty's escaping really started after we got the dogs (we got one in Feb and the other in June) and the door was being opened and shut much more often.

So we'll see how it goes. And Frosty did not get out every day. Maybe once or twice a week, then maybe not at all for a week or two. I had no clue he even left our yard. We also have a ton of raccoons, possums, etc...

The neighbor is basically a good guy, but by his own admission, he is too much a control freak and gets into people's business too much. (he's called the police on many issues like another neighbor having a car w/no license plates on his driveway, he complains about the way people put their recyclables in the bins, etc.) so I am not feeling like he's picking only on me. Guess it was just my turn.

Dahli

Sunday, September 28, 2003 - 02:02 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
CayCaye - you said it well...
I have two whippets (always leashed or in my yard) My neighbour has two cats... digging up my mulch crushing flowers and coming into the yard. I warned her if the dogs see the cats in the yard and catch them it's game over - she, basially doesn't 'get' what this breed is capable of, but said I better not let that happen!!
Some cat people really think they're above it and some neighbours get pretty tired of it. I'm not even checking anymore if they're in the yard before my guys go out. I've done what I can - her cats are her responsibility. It's hard to be neighbourly with attitudes like that unfortunately.

Juju2bigdog

Sunday, September 28, 2003 - 09:26 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Dahli, I don't "get it" either. I know next to nothing about whippets, and I would guess there are a lot of people like that. What are the characteristics of whippets? I guess you are saying a whippet would automatically kill a cat? Do they kill squirrels?

Dahli

Monday, September 29, 2003 - 09:04 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Juju - yes they will chase and shake to death anything that runs if they catch it... Our living room window has been rattled a few times when they saw a squirrel in the front They are twirling howling crazy beings when on walks and a squirrel passes by.
I have seen my two sweet little couch potatoes rip a gopher in half in my back yard - chase down a small dog who was visiting and running in the back yard and we had a heart attack getting them off - it's called prey drive and is very strong in this breed. So the same dog that can sleep with a kitten one minute will rip it apart the next if it's running. The sighthounds are much like that hence the greyhound races and lure coursing popularity, they don't run that fast for nothin'! LOL

Tabbyking

Monday, September 29, 2003 - 09:36 am EditMoveDeleteIP
i think i would be afraid to have a whippet as a pet. if anything that runs is fair game, aren't they considered 'vicious' dogs? i guess i am just used to my golden retriever, who raised our kittens from birth! i have what i consider a 'pet'.

Dahli

Monday, September 29, 2003 - 09:36 am EditMoveDeleteIP
I didn't want you to think they're vicious dogs so I should add that this breed is sweet, docile, smart, sensitive, very cuddly (velcro like) and gentle,wonderful with children and other animals... quiet don't smell, have few genetic problems, need no grooming besides nails, they shed very little and bark hardly at all are relatively small and look fragile and delicate - they'll sleep 23 hours a day which makes them perfect aparment dogs, they're quite the paradox because they're so powerful - this weekend when we had them out running and they saw a rabbit it was amaaaaazing to see the speed - of all the sight hounds they are able to turn and cut brilliantly - luckily the rabbit got away but it was close! Hope this helps.

Squaredsc

Monday, September 29, 2003 - 09:40 am EditMoveDeleteIP
i love whippets, they are sooo cute. but they are hunting dogs and doing what they were bred to do right? and retrievers are hunting dogs also?