Archive through October 23, 2003
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TV ClubHouse: archives: Adven's Great Reality Adventure (and what not) (ARCHIVE): Diary Room: Archive through October 23, 2003

Zachsmom

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 12:02 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
****walks in shuts door****

***looks at chair and notices Readers "BOB"****

Why the heck is Reader always leaving her BOB around...gross me out! Always coming in for batteries too, she's going to wear that thing out!

****walks out*****

Squaredsc

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 12:12 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***sashaying into the room and closes the door gently***

i don't know who reader is trying to fool. i think she's going for the psycho vote or something. and i swear 'mom is trying to poison me. jealousy is an ugly thing. and she had the nerve to tell some polar bear story and said she would teach me to pee standing up. now i ask you why would i have a need to know how to do that? do i plan on being near polar bears? no. will i be out in the woods where there is no bathroom? no. so wtf? i swear everyone here is off their freakin rocker.

***kicking reader's bob out of the way and sashays out of the room***

Reader234

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 12:33 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***innocent reader comes in****

What's all this talk of 'bob'?

I've just now figured out how the tape recorder works....now that I know its voice activated...

This zmom and squared have a conspiracy I'm telling you. They keep telling such wild fantastic stories you wouldnt believe!! And the amazing thing, I swear I've heard this polar bear story somewhere before, but this mom thinks we'll believe she can urinate standing up... I hear she watches some (*blushing) 'off color' movies... who would guess. I thought she was innocent, she cooks up such meals. Has anyone seen her wash her hands???

Jan, now there is someone who you dont see much. She keeps running around and tidying things up. She has a kind soul, and I hope her friends are doing much better!!

I understand there are 10 people in the house, do we all have to come in the diary room? Tish and Lori are very quiet houseguests. You'd hardly know they are here!!

So far its just Mak and I out getting a workout... she really pushes me. Those last 25 sit ups werent that easy. I may be sore for weeks! Can I get a supply of ice paks here?

*yawn, well I think it may be nap time...

***reader trips over white object left on floor, and gives it to the cameraman in the corner, who knows a "zporn" is she here too?**** exit

Jan

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 12:58 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
****a pleased Jan walks in****

I am very pleased because, although my scared story is really lame and can't win, at least the assignment is done!!!!!

I know they tell me there are 10 people here but I sure can't find all of them. Where the hell are Lori and Tish?

Who all is supposed to be here? I can't find the list of housemates anymore? where is it? who is missing? all of a sudden I don't feel so peaceful anymore.

oops..it's time. I must sneak off to the secret TV set to watch and transcribe S.O.Tehn I must find Reader and Mak to do some exercise. Maybe cards later.

Bye cameraman bob. Have a happy

***jan struts off to find the TV***

Twiggyish

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 02:57 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
******Twiggy quietly shuts the door********

Hi Bob, That handsome but adorable Adven has given us a difficult task. I have several experiences to share, but I'm not sure which one to use.

I'll leave now..I hear a lot of noise going on outside. That Aubergine room is very noisy..LOL

**********Twiggy leaves.............

Mak1

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 03:46 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***Mak rushes in and collapses on the floor in laughter***

These people are nuts! I love them! I wish there was a place where we could all just live together forever and tell each other stories and eat imaginery food and watch imaginery movies with imaginery Meatloaf music in the background while we do our imaginery aerobics beside our imaginery hot tub.

What? You say there really are places like that, and we're not far from being admitted....Ohhhh, never mind. (Emily Litella of SNL)

***Mak regains most of her composure, and promptly leaves the DR***

Grannyg

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 03:57 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
*********granny struts in very proud*********

I know that when Adven and Square try to go bouncy tonight that there needs to be a nite cam on them. You see I let ALL of the water out of the water bed and stuffed it with yellow duckies with the little squeaky thingie in them. There will be a LOT of noise tonight when they tango and I surely believe that those internet nerds will love to see their reaction to all those duckies instead of water. Now I have to find someway to distract that Reader gal. Man, can she talk. Maybe zporn will show us a movie while A & S make whoopie. And that Mak gal is sooooooooo into doing workouts. sheesh, she is killing me. Like really, does she think that like that's all we want to do? And Twigs, well she is a whole nother story that I'll get into in my next session. I'm still trying to make out with Lance but I can't get him away from Jan long enough for him to get to know the real me. Maybe tonight I will get a one on one date with Lance. aaahhhhhhhh.

******granny struts out again proud********

Adven

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 04:12 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
****Adven walks in munching on some stolen PB&J****

I wonder if I paid the mole enough? Stuck in here with these loonies. The poor dear must be about to snap at any moment. Funny they haven't caught on that the mole is... Wait! There's someone at the door!

**** Adven rushes out stuffing sandwich in mouth****

Jan

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 04:35 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
*****jan sneaks in to pick up the clue that Adven just dropped***

"the poor dear" doesn't sound like Lance to me. I think we can elim Lance from consideration as the mole. What say you all?

or is Adven using reverse psychology on us? I wouldn't put it past him.

maybe it isn't a good clue after all. I guess it means the mole definitely isn't Lance or it definitely is Lance.sigh

PS Granny leave my little Lance mole alone. I DO NOT share

***Jan sneaks out to get a drink. Where is the booze***

Ddr1135

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 04:39 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
BB 2ND ASSISTANT MAKES NOTE TO PUT TRASHCAN NEAR WATERBED.....DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE TO CLEAN UP LIKE LAST TIME.

Grannyg

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 05:21 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
*************granny wanders in*************

hells bells, you mean there really is a mole in this crowd? who in their right mind would enter this house knowing they weren't gonna win no dang money? i came here for the money. i don't want to make no life long friends, i already got too many of them and they keep asking for money, so i need the money to keep my life long friends because without the money they would probably leave and not be my friends and then i wouldn't have no friends so maybe i ought to make life long friends while i'm here just in case i don't win the money, i'll still have life long friends.

***********granny wanders out***********

Adven

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 06:02 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Jesus H, Granny!! I think that's the funniest think I've ever read!! I don't normally hand these out, but ROTFLMAO!!!

Reader234

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 06:55 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
********reader slams door****

Can you believe that near death experiences arent enough to win HOH!!

Unbelievable!! I certainly cant imagine what you have planned for the next challenge, but I'm here to tell you I have 2 left feet, and I use poles to go hiking with!!

Jan keeps trying to tell me Lance is the mole.. well he cant be the mole, his butt isnt big enough.

The way I see it, its an outsider, I've been watching the other BB shows, and they always wait, then let a visitor come in, or one of the house guests out. We're lucky, its usually the old people booted out first, there are more of us moldy oldies - those young duckies better watch out!!

bwwwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Much better now, think I'll go see if there is any vodka by the hot tub left!!

****reader glides out****

Squaredsc

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 07:53 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***sashaying in the room dripping from the hot tub***

<sigh> these people are just too weird. now lance is saying its good to be peed on. where do yall get these people. it's like the freakin twilight zone. and reader is still talking to herself and she took too damn long getting me my drink. <sigh> well maybe if i ask her for another one now i will get it before its bedtime.

***sashays back out of the room and leaves the door open***

Heyltslori

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:02 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
*************storms in and plops in big comfy chair*********

Can we talk? Hello? For pete's sake say something!!!! Ok, fine. Whatever. Here's the deal. I'm sitting in the hottub enjoying a nice dip and chatting with Square and Zmom, when all of a sudden Lance joins us. Now...I'm thinking to myself WOOHOO!! because...well you know. So anywho....uh the water's getting hotter... bubbles are rising...and everybody's getting kinda cozy if ya know what I mean. THEN...Lance cracks some joke about blow jobs or something and suddenly Zmom starts laughing outta control-like. I mean, yeah it was funny....but we're not talkin' Seinfeld here. So...she's laughing like those hyena's in the Lion King when all of a sudden she stops....puts down her drink....and starts apologzing left and right!!! She freakin' peed in the hottub!!!! Now I just wanna go on record right now that I have nothing against peeing in like a big pool or something...where it can sorta spread out and not bother anybody...but the hottub???? I didn't sign up for this shit!!! Now I gotta go shower! And you and I both know that there is basically no way to shower in THIS house without having my boobs plastered all over the internet!! I'm just sayin'.

************slams door on way out*************

Mak1

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:08 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***Mak walks in and closes door, sits on chair and then leaps up***

some people are so inconsiderate. whoever peed in the damn chair could have at least wiped it off. whatever! i've left everyone getting drunk in the hot tub, so maybe i can get a few good hours of sleep before they all come stumbling back in. i'm hoping to get in some sleuthing in the wee hours of the morning...trying to catch reader sleeping in 2 rooms simultaneously...need to see if granny does her disappearing act again tonight...where is lance sleeping?...what's with all the squeaking in the aubergine room? enquiring minds want to know! HEY! isn't that Adven's nice a$$ laying on the floor over there. <sigh> i don't like to complain, but i do wish everyone would pick up after themselves

goodnight john-boy

***Mak wipes off the chair with her own towel, pats the a$$ in a nonthreatening way, and places it in a clean dry spot where it will be found and reattached, and shuffles off to bed in her bunny slippers***

Zachsmom

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:11 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
**** walks in laughing****

NO I didn't pee in the hot tub! I just wanted Lori OUT of the tub. My gosh, did you see her bend over and show off her thong bikini? And what is up with the pasties as a bathing suit top? Really what is up with that? Might as well go naked for all the material she's wearing. Maybe I'll just call her "HeyItsSlutty".

*****walks out laughing and calling for drink****

Heyltslori

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:12 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
ROFLMAO!!!

Lancecrossfire

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:15 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Wow--at first I thought it said "HeyItsSnotty", then thought to myself, wait, she didn't sneeze.

Squaredsc

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 08:19 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
***sashays back into the room and gently closes the door***

i tell ya they are all skanks. again i say where do these people come from? did they not get any home training? and that heiffer reader still didn't bring me my 2nd drink.

***sashays back out of the room and trips of bob, and kicks it back to the corner***

Bigd

Wednesday, October 22, 2003 - 09:24 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
is this the funniest thread EVER?

Grannyg

Thursday, October 23, 2003 - 03:07 am EditMoveDeleteIP
*********granny storms in**************

Ok, what is the deal? I stayed up most of the night before trying to find the wenches that were suppose to be here. i searched and looked in every nook and cranny. boy, did i see some things but the reason i'm here is because when i finally went to sleep, then everybody falls apart. screaming and running through the house about peeing in the hot tub, peeing standing up. what is the fixation with peeing all of a sudden. it ain't like we never done it before. very simple process. sheesh, these people have already gone bonkers being locked up and it's only been a few days. what ever will they be like after a few more. and the booze. would you please try to keep the stuff to a minimum? dang, these people are crazy enough without it and then you go and give them all they want. i know it's good for ratings but i would really like to live and be able to talk about this when we get out.

**********granny storms out***********

Adven

Thursday, October 23, 2003 - 06:49 am EditMoveDeleteIP
It is Bigd. I'm in awe. This is the funniest stuff I've ever seen! I bust a gut every time I come here.

Zachsmom

Thursday, October 23, 2003 - 09:28 am EditMoveDeleteIP
**** stomps in closes door ****

What the heck is the problem with these people? First Square shaken her booty on the butcher block, the HeyItsSlutty bending over with her dental floss showing us her moon, then granny does a sit-n-spin on the table! Where did you find these people? Couldn't have been Belly's..must of been "Booty's"

**** Kicks BOB..stomps out ****

Jan

Thursday, October 23, 2003 - 10:08 am EditMoveDeleteIP
***Jan walks majestically into her throne room to accept her manifest destiny***

I just came to thank the powers that be (that would be Adven, AKA TPTB)for recognizing the true merit in my rather lame story. I knew I could make him feel sorry me and trick him into giving me my well deserved power.

I have all these HG's fooled but I am so glad I get to come in here and vent privately, where they can't hear me. They have no idea how devious I can be and how much I planned to get this power.

BE WARNED, TPTB!!!! Now that I have obtained this power, I WILL NEVER GIVE IT UP!

***struts majestically to door, then quickly disguises herself to once again look like that nice lady, Jan, with the ever present smile and walks humbly out of the room****