Archive through February 12, 2003
TV ClubHouse: Archives: 2003 February:
The Female Breast Thread: Discussion:
Archive through February 12, 2003
Adven | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 07:00 am     A couple of days ago I started the female breast thread because, well, because I was bored. I thought the idea of a guy trying to pretend he was doing serious research just so he could see breasts was funny. Being shallow, insensitive and self-absorbed, I never considered anyone might find it offensive and, heaven forbid, not funny. I am aware, though, that the breast is a powerful social, sexual and maternal symbol in our culture and that there may be legitimate reasons for some people not appreciating the joke, no matter how innocently intended. Rather than have you comment in the other thread, where you run the risk of coming across as a humorless fuddy duddy, I've set up this thread where, if people want, they can discuss it more seriously. Personally, I'm struck by the apparent split between those who found it hilarious and those who found it vaguely offensive and would love to hear why people think that is. |
Hermione69 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 07:19 am     Truly, I wasn't offended, it just isn't something I care to joke about with a bunch of strangers. If this was a serious thesis, I would have reacted differently, but it was put forth as a joke and at first I rolled my eyes in a half-amused, half-exasperated way, but as more and more people joined in, it started to make me uncomfortable. It seemed to go over the top. I have similiar conversations with my friends and family about breasts, flatulence, a whole bunch of un-PC stuff, and we LOAO, but I didn't feel it was particularly appropriate thread for a moderated message board among individuals who really don't know each other beyond typed text. It made me uncomfortable because you really don't know the people behind the messages or the motivation for the comments. So I stayed out of it and let those who enjoyed it have their fun. I do feel that when Maris voiced a dissenting opinion, that response to her was harsh and that is part of what made me uncomfortable. I thought Maris made some good points. Lon also mentioned about his family member having breast cancer and he didn't find it funny. My mom just went a round with breast cancer last year and a good friend of mine just lost her mother to breast cancer in December. Possibly that did color my perception of it as well. The biggie, though, was as I said before-- its the type of stuff I joke about with family and friends, but was not comfortable joking about with anonymous strangers. I know there are people on these boards who have actually met and that may lighten the issue for them, but most of us have not met other members and I just wasn't comfortable with the jokes in this case. I also thought some of the comments were downright stupid, no offense meant to anyone, that was just my reaction. |
Texannie | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 07:24 am     I wasn't offended. I just didn't find it funny. |
Fluff | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:25 am     slowly backing away |
Fluff | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:27 am     Wait a minute?? It wasn't a serious thesis? Oh heezy, dude. You had it coming.  |
Karuuna | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:28 am     I found it offensive. While it may be a male stereotype to think that guys want to go out and fondle a lot of female breasts, the reality is that guys that actually do that are treating women as objects. I find the objectification of any human being to be offensive. I also imagine the role reversal. If we were joking about a woman wanting to go out and fondle a bunch of male penises, that woman would be thought a <word the board will automatically censor>. So why is it funny if a guy wants to do it, but a woman is labeled in a derogatory way if she would do the same? Finally, I find certain words used in reference to anatomical parts offensive, whether those parts be male or female. The words are *meant* to be derogatory, and using them in a humorous way doesn't make them any less so. So, call me a humorless fuddy duddy... it will be one of the nicest names I've been called in a long time. Truly, I think there are great ways to have fun and to make people laugh, without resorting to somewhat adolescent and deprecating humor.  |
Ophiliasgrandma | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:33 am     When you've suffered waiting for the results of a biopsy, breast jokes don't seem so funny. (Praise God it was benign.) |
Kaili | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:49 am     I have to agree- I read the start of the thread before there were any reponses and I just thought it was kind of inappropriate. I read the first 10 reponses or so waiting to see if anyone would say what I was thinking and it seemed many women jumped in on the joke, which actually surprised me. I was surprised by the postive response and all the commentary about it being the funniest thread in a long time. My first thought was... I liked the sock watch thread, that was funny. I'm not seeing the humor. Then again, I'm not really into breast (or another anatomy) humor. I thought maybe I just wasn't seeing something that everyone else was. I didn't like the requests for photos- I didn't take it as a joke but rather as kind of sleazy. I actually thought it was a way to get nude photos and I was thinking they're ALL OVER the internet! Adven, it would have probably helped if I knew you. I know I have seen your name on posts but I don't know your personality and I don't recall the posts so I couldn't have known where you were coming from with this idea. So...I just passed over the thread and ignored it like I ignore others I'm not interested in. I just figured to each his own, ya know? But then I finally open this thread to see what this one is supposed to be about since there was already a discussion going on in there. I had no idea that anyone had objected to the thread or voiced anything to that effect. And so here I am, adding my opinion. Carry on now |
Ginger1218 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 08:55 am     Well, I happen to find it funny. Sometimes, we need to lighten up and not take every word so seriously. It was not a mean spirited post. It was witty. I can understand if some people have different kinds of sense of humor. This was a dry humor, which I find very funny. Some people don't. But, there are a lot of things I find offensive and ridiculous. I just ignore it. |
Marysafan | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:00 am     I checked it out early on...decided it wasn't my cup of tea...and ignored it. |
Ginger1218 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:03 am     Exactly, Mary. |
Kaili | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:10 am     Why, is there a big debate going on in there? Like I said, I have ignored it ever since i decided I wasn't into it. It seems like it must have died down though...I use the new messages option and haven't seen much action going on in there this morning. I don't see anything wrong with this thread though. It's just discussion and Adven asked why some people aren't interested in the thread and we are all just giving reasons. Please please please don't let this end up in hot topics...haha. |
Hermione69 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:11 am     Ginger, Of all the people that have posted here in this thread so far saying they didn't find it funny or found it offensive, not one of us posted in the breast thread saying that. We WERE ignoring it. This is a different forum where Adven particularly asked why some of us had different reactions and THAT is what we are responding to. I would also like to say that just because some people don't find the same thing funny as others, doesn't mean they need to "lighten up." Anyone who knows me knows I have a great sense of humor. That is kind of my point. No one here really *KNOWS* me and I don't really *KNOW* any of you and in this particular case, it is not subject matter I feel comfortable joking about with strangers in the spirit of that thread. Sometimes people here will post off-the-cuff innuendos in other threads that are pretty funny, but a whole thread devoted to talking about breasts and making puns about tits and hooters is not my type of humor. |
Hermione69 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:12 am     Kaili, we posted similar responses at the same time! Cool! |
Karuuna | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:26 am     Ginger, like the others I didn't post any objection in the thread itself. I chose to pretty much ignore it as well. Here, Adven asked why we found it offensive. We're answering his question. That's all. But nice of you to validate what we were already doing. I will note that when a few folks objected in that thread itself, they pretty much got jumped on. I didn't think that was appropriate either. |
Car54 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:55 am     When I said I was not offended, I don't think that implies that others are not entitled to feel whatever they feel. I just feel differently. I feel that there is room for both opinions. Goodness knows the board is full of personal threads devoted to health and emotions..clearly we make a place for those feelings. I don't usually discuss THOSE issues with strangers, but feel pretty comfortable joking around with said strangers. See... differing perspective...neither one is wrong or right..just different. I did feel that some posters who felt somehow offended did seem to be passing judgement on those of us who were not. To be honest, I felt that was just not valid and kind of made me a lot less sympathetic to their position. Just my feelings. I think there is plenty of room on the board for a thread to discuss serious health related or cultural issues if that is of interest- this just wasn't exactly the thread but there could be a thread like that very easily created. Over at the SS board, I have a favorite poster...and the sig line he has put on all of his posts is a great one... "Hey if you don't like the posts...just scroll down...that's what I do." I like that a lot. Adven, I don't know you much at all but I have enjoyed the little interaction we have had and I find you fun to "chat" with. Frankly I thought all day that the intent of the thread was to see how long it would take for someone to step in and say they were offended....not with any malice or real intention...just for curiosity. I was really expecting it all day long given the nature of a lot of our community and it surprised me that it went almost all day and into the evening before it happened. I am glad you started this thread. |
Egbok | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:55 am     I for one, enjoyed the thread Adven started and found myself reading it from start to finish and for the most part getting a big laugh out of some of the posters comments. It was witty and I took it as such. The only thing that made me uncomfortable were the "wet blanket" comments that were added at times. I immediately thought that this was going to turn into a mudfest, which doesn't help to promote the positive side of our little community here at the TVCH. |
Egbok | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:57 am     Hi Car |
Hermione69 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 09:59 am     <BTW, Opheliasgrandma, I am very, very, VERY happy for your that the biopsy results were benign!!!!> |
Wink | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:06 am     What Car said and what Hermione said directly above me. |
Mosessupposes | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:08 am     "humorless fuddy duddy"??? Maybe your starting a "shallow, insensitive and self-absorbed" thread is what made it seem "humorless". I read that thread and why anyone would find it "hilarious" was beyond me. Then again, grown adults who find 3rd grade humor (farting and belching) funny is also beyond me. I wonder if the posters who responded to the topic like giggling school girls would respond in real life in the exact same manner. Yeah, when I was in 3rd grade, I might have found that thread funny, but now I am an adult and a humorless fuddy duddy. Of course in real life I appreciate an occasional breast every now and then...but for recreational purposes only. |
Sabbatia | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:08 am     Sorry guys, but I don't equate my breasts to a man's penis. I have other parts that I equate to that. To me, they are either groceries or just another body part. Everybody has them, it's just some are bigger than others. As for taking them seriously, i've had biopsies, I've had mammograms every yr since my late 30s, I see a surgeon every six months. By the time you've had major surgery to them, they become just another body part like your feet or hands. |
Adven | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:11 am     My own feelings are similar to Car's. The thread was meant to be inane so that those who enjoy that kind of thing could get in there and run with it. Now, had someone started a more serious thread on the topic and I went into it and tried to be glib and funny, that would strike me as inappropriate and I assume I would be called on it. Conversely, if a silly thread is generated and someone wishes to jump into the middle of it and "tsk tsk" it, maybe they should expect to be called on that as well. Making generalized jokes about breasts, none of them mean-spirited, does not mean people are insensitive to breast cancer or the objectification of women or other women's issues. |
Ginger1218 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:13 am     I did not "Jump" on anybody. I merely stated that people have different types of humor, not that they had "no" sense of humor. What one finds funny, some do not. Much that is made light of, I find ridiculous and offensive. Just as others came here to state their opinion - So did I. It seems like people want to be entitled to their opinions, but if a comment is made, it means they are being "jumped" on. If you read my comment, it says "Sometimes WE need to lighten up" If someone choose to take offense to that, there is nothing I can do. |
Ginger1218 | Wednesday, February 12, 2003 - 10:16 am     Karuuna says: "Here, Adven asked why we found it offensive. We're answering his question. That's all. But nice of you to validate what we were already doing."
I am always glad to be of service Karuuna. I like to validate. LOL |
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