I need some parenting advice about racism
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Fluff | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 08:42 am     LOL! You're my Juju! |
Squaredsc | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 01:02 pm     lumbele, no my kids do not protest that they can't say that word or other words for that matter. we also use curse words that they know their not to use. it the do as i say, not as i do rule. and no you are not offending anyone by asking. oh, and its used as more of a slang term as opposed to being offensive when used between ouselves. i hope im explaining it right. fluff, i agree with most of what you said. but as i said above, there is no rhyme or reason why i get offended when someone else says it and i don't condem(sp) anyone else for feeling that way or not. it just is. oh great example of this is when jlo used the "n" word in her song i'm real with ja rule and i was surprised when i heard it as others were and of course the media blew it up. but people were offended when she used that word in a song as opposed to lil kim using it. |
Squaredsc | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 01:03 pm     yo juju dog, whas up? lol.  |
Fluff | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 01:13 pm     Oh yeah, Square, I heard about that! I honestly think that those people had no business getting all mad about it because if Ja Rule was singing those lyrics, they would be all for it. I thought it was an unecessary complaint. In that case, the people who complain should stop listening to that type of music altogether. |
Squaredsc | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 01:27 pm     well i complained and i still listen to the music. and im sorry but its just feels different depending on who is saying it. there was an episode on boston public that covered the same issue and i think it was handled very well, i should have taped it in fact. |
Pamy | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 03:45 pm     This is such an interesting thread. My son is ‘mixed’ (I am still not sure if there is a better word for it). He is 7 and surprisingly the subject of race has not come up yet. We live in CA and he has always gone to private schools that have had children of many different nationalities. I guess that since he has always been around kids of all races it has never been an issue. He just accepts people come in all different shapes, sizes, and colors, no biggie. How wonderful the world would be if we never have to explain the differences in people. The closest my son has come to asking about it was one day he asked me why I had freckles on my arms and if he ever would. I told him different people have different skin, it doesn’t make them different on the inside just different on the outside and said wouldn’t the world be boring if everyone looked the same, plus how would we ever tell each other apart, kinda making it seem funny or silly if we would all look the same. I told him he probably wouldn’t ever get freckles and I wish my skin was as beautiful as his, and he said ‘Is that why you buy that stuff that makes your skin look more like mine?” LOL, he was talking about the ‘tan in a can’ stuff I use!!! As for the ‘N’ word, it is not used in our house or by our friends, however ‘cracker’ is used frequently, just kidding! I want to know if you have talked to the boys parents yet. I am very curious to how they reacted. I am hoping it went well. |
Hippyt | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 07:21 pm     Squared,see you got my point exactly! It's just not okay for my son to say this,and when it came from his best friend,it's very confusing to him. Turns out it was a song. Yesterday he was sitting on my bed,and started to sing,then said,'Mom,I almost said n---.' Turns out they both heard the song from my idiot young neighbor who likes to blast his car stereo all afternoon. (He bashed up his car last night,lol) Anyway,everything is fine. I had let it go,and now he knows not to say it. |
Meggieprice | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 08:15 pm     Pamy- my zachyd is "mixed" too and-well- is CA some kind of protective womb or what?- it does not seem to have been an issue. However it is something I make sure to keep open communication about now that he is older (10). I think we are kidding ourselves to think it will never come up or be an issue. He has been in an alternative school and I want to be aware that the world will not always be that way for him. Funnily, my ex really doesn't have an ethnic cultural identity, it is really myself and my new Cauc. husband who have been trying to make sure that is in Z's life. We jumped the broom at our wedding! I think that the world around is is becoming more and more delightfully mixed - and I also think that mixed children are often extra beautiful as if to show God's approval. |
Juju2bigdog | Friday, November 01, 2002 - 08:21 pm     Yo, squared. I'm down wit it.
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Squaredsc | Saturday, November 02, 2002 - 03:41 pm     hippyt, glad to finally be of some service to someone, lol. this topic was very interesting and i was talking to d.h. about it and he said he has no problem with someone who is not a/a saying it and of course i mentioned what i said here and he just poo-pooed me. lol juju.  |
Wargod | Saturday, November 02, 2002 - 04:48 pm     Speaking of poo-pooed! How do the rest of your parents keep your kids from calling each other and other children names? It just drives me insane to hear my 6 year old come home from school and call his sister a "poo-poo butt head" and then to hear my angelic, sweet(hahahahahhahahaha) 4 year old daughter repeat it to him! On the race issue, we just never made any kind of deal out of what race anyone was and the kids really never thought about it too much. We have friends of different nationalities, religions, they're just friends. I think the first time Caleb noticed something different was a few months ago we went to a baptism for a friends baby, and the whole thing was done in Spanish. Caleb made it through about half an hour and finally said (loud enough to carry to the front of the church) "Mom, I can't understand a word that man is saying!" LOL. I waited til after the baptism to explain that people from different countries spoke other languages..of course, by that time he was more intersted in playing with the other kids, lol. |
Hippyt | Saturday, November 02, 2002 - 05:27 pm     That's a tough one War,I always get on to him,but I swear some of the names they come up with really make it hard not to crack up laughing.'Hey,Dog-butt!'for example. Squared,I can understand why you would feel that way.I was thinking about it earlier today,and my thought was this- If I want to call my Hubby Dumba@@ all day long,that's my perogative,But if anyone else called him a dumba@@,I'd jump all over them.Does that make any sort of sense? |
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