Faerygdds | Friday, June 15, 2001 - 03:44 pm     His cheese has slipped off his cracker |
Fruitbat | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 10:01 am     Toys in the Attic |
Zeb | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 10:07 am     A piston short of a GT |
Highlander | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 10:09 am     Black Hole |
Faerygdds | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 10:13 am     A cuckoo short of a clock |
Grod | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 12:09 pm     a needle shy of an execution (heard it this week on McVeigh) |
Lee | Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 01:57 pm     The elevator goes up, but the door doesn't open! |
Wcv63 | Tuesday, June 19, 2001 - 07:58 am     The porch light's on but no one's home. He/She has cobwebs in the attic. Stupid is as stupid does (nod to Forrest Gump) |
Wcv63 | Tuesday, June 19, 2001 - 08:03 am     He/she took an IQ test and the results were negative. There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't. He/She is not a complete idiot, some parts are missing. Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot. Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool. |
Spygirl | Tuesday, June 19, 2001 - 10:32 am     Got this one from Anne Robinson last night on Weakest Link: "one monkey short of a circus" |
Nancy | Friday, June 29, 2001 - 06:03 am     You can look in his eyes and see there is no driver in there |
Nancy | Friday, June 29, 2001 - 06:04 am     You would forget your head if it wasn't tied on |
Nancy | Friday, June 29, 2001 - 06:06 am     His sidewalk doesn't quite go around the block |
Nancy | Friday, June 29, 2001 - 06:07 am     All of her cups ain't in the cupboard. |
Grooch | Friday, June 29, 2001 - 06:12 am     He/She is a fruitloop. |
Nancy | Saturday, July 14, 2001 - 04:26 am     here's one i heard on weakest link: who makes tarzan loook like a rhode's scholar |
Grooch | Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 12:24 pm     Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching. A room temperature IQ. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together. Agross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus. A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on. A prime candidate for natural deselection. Bright as Alaska in December. One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests. Donated his body to science before he was done using it. Fell out of the family tree. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it. He is so dense, light bends around him. If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm. One neuron short of a synapse. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled. Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. |
Babyruth | Friday, September 28, 2001 - 08:12 pm     As a newbie this year, I just found this thread and have been cracking up! I'd like to offer one I haven't seen posted yet: He's as deep as a cookie sheet. |
Bernie | Thursday, October 04, 2001 - 08:43 am     He's as thick as two short planks..and just as dense. |
Franny | Sunday, October 14, 2001 - 09:06 am     splinters in the windmill of his mind |
Franny | Sunday, October 14, 2001 - 09:09 am     Somewhere there's a village who's lost their idiot |
Weinermr | Sunday, October 14, 2001 - 09:19 am     A few beans short of a burrito special... |
Babyruth | Sunday, October 14, 2001 - 09:03 pm     LOL!!! "splinters in the windmill of his mind" I like this!! |
Oregonfire | Sunday, October 14, 2001 - 09:07 pm     a few bytes short of a hard drive |
Kayewer | Monday, October 15, 2001 - 02:00 pm     a lightbulb short of a chandelier a nucleus short of a lifeform If you look in his ear, you see a sign saying "Space For Rent." If you put your ear up to his, you'd hear zero gravity. If he went hunting and saw a sign saying "Bear Left," he'd turn around and go home. Somebody didn't light the pilot light. Left the brain in the glass on the nightstand. |
Sunshinemiss | Friday, October 19, 2001 - 05:11 am     If dumb were dirt he could cover an acre. |
Franny | Friday, October 19, 2001 - 06:57 am     If ignorance is bliss, he lives in hog heaven. |