Archive through January 18, 2003
MoveCloseDeleteAdmin

TV ClubHouse: Archives: 2003 January: Who wants to quit smoking with me? (ARCHIVE): Archive through January 18, 2003

Juju2bigdog

Wednesday, January 15, 2003 - 06:28 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Hehehehehe, Denecee, Juju knows all!

Congratulations! Come here as often as you need. And may I recommend as soon as you have it licked, go to the doctor? Ten years is too long to go, way too long. And then you can proudly say you used to smoke, but you don't anymore.

Yay, Denecee!!!

Llkoolaid

Thursday, January 16, 2003 - 06:32 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Yeah, Juju and Dahli I did start this thread and am so glad that it is still around and people are still using it to help them quit.

If I can give one piece of advice that helped me it is to check in here everyday and let us know how you are doing and just eat up the praise and encouragement.

You really do have to change you mind set from thinking you are depriving yourself of something to you are giving yourself something.

Make a list of all the things that cigarettes smoking gives you that is good. Then make a list of all the things that not smoking gives you. If you really think about it there will probably not be anything in the pro smoking list. Post it on the fridge, make copies to carry around with you, everytime you get the urge to smoke, read your lists and then decide if you want to have that cigarette.

Mark of the days on a calendar, you will be surprised how fast they go by and the further you get the less likely you will be to give up.

Reward yourself, what you are doing is the biggest reward you can give yourself but treat yourself to little things with the money you save.

After you quit for a few weeks, get close to a heavy smoker and get a real good whiff of them, they Stink. You really don't notice it until you have quit for a little while. Believe me, you won't want to smell like that.

If you have a lapse, don't beat yourself up for it. Just get right back at it. Most everyone has lapses and hard days but what a wonderful feeling when you get through one of these days.

Don't give up, make up your mind that this is the time you are going to do it. Be stubborn.

It feels so good to realize that you have won. I know you can do this. Juju and Dahli are the best cheerleaders in the world and helped me so much.

Denecee, Tash and Jagger, you guys should do this like the buddy system and the rest of us will encourage you.

Dahli

Thursday, January 16, 2003 - 07:39 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Good tips LL you non-smoker you! How long has it been? Anniversary coming up soon??
It's amazing to think I've been free for almost 2 years! I still get excited to think that somebody is escaping the monster and that's why I come here to hopefully help others make a break for it....

Denecee

Thursday, January 16, 2003 - 08:57 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Thanks Juju, LlKoolaid! I do have a list of reasons not to smoke that are very important to me and most people. I have it posted in my living room for all to read. My kids read it and added another reason- they love me. We talk about it openly, (they are all teenagers). They tell me they are proud of me and it feels good to hear them say that. I love spending more time with them as I use to spend alot of time in the garage smoking. I don't have to rush home to do my workout so that I can then have a cigarette, which is what I use to do. Thanks for listening!

Lumbele

Thursday, January 16, 2003 - 04:52 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Weeeeeeeelllll, time to slink back in here.
Like Jagger, I too fell off the waggon over the holidays. No excuses, just lack of willpower, but I have since managed to grab hold of the back rail and heaved one foot back onto the ride to a smoke-free life.
Dahli's fav book arrived, too and as soon as my specs get back I will stick my nose in it.
Denecee, you are not alone. Not in the I-wanna-quit, grumpy and/or crochet department. After wearing out my knitting needles I am now running that poor crochet hook redhot. If you need any patterns my folder is the place to scream for them. Hang on tight, Jagger and I are right behind you and the "once-upon-a-time-smokers" here really are a great help with their encouragement.

Juju2bigdog

Thursday, January 16, 2003 - 06:31 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
LOL, welcome back, Lumbele. Yeah! If you fall off that danged horse, you gotta get back on and ride.

Dahli

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 07:46 am EditMoveDeleteIP
HI Lumbele!! glad to know the book arrived, my source in Vegas tells me it is no longer available. That makes me sad. Hope it helps so at some point it will click...Hey now the buddy system has 4!! Any more out there??

Tashakinz

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 08:43 am EditMoveDeleteIP
An Addict's Diary

Day 5: Ahhh, better living through (legal) chemistry. I'm still crocheting up a storm to keep my fingers busy, but I feel sooooooooooo much better now. lol My doctor told me "congratulations on being a non-smoker."

Day 6: I woke up and wasn't gritting my teeth this morning. This is a vast improvement over the last few days. I understand that I can't stay on the prescriptions forever, but they are so helping me. I may even let hubby invite the neighbor over tonight. I've been keeping him away because he's a smoker and I haven't wanted to be around ANY temptations. (plus he's an idiot lol) I understand that I have to face the reality that I can't just cut off all of my friends (and hubby's) just because they smoke. Now that I feel a little calmer it may be a good time to test my resolve/nerves.

How did everyone else handle the "friends who are smokers" issue? Any advice would be helpful.

Thanks!!!!!

Dahli

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 09:16 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Tash, I tried not to feel too obviously sorry for them nor call them stupid out loud hehehe! But Juju said it best above cuz it's all within your control and how you choose to see it.

"On the other hand, until you can quit seeing smokes as a highly valuable forbidden object that you are depriving yourself of, and start seeing them as a chain around your drowning neck, you might not be really ready to quit. And that's also why nobody can quit because somebody else wants them to. You can only quit for yourself"

Tashakinz

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 11:12 am EditMoveDeleteIP
There will always be a part of me that will miss the ritual, dem's just da berries. I'm quitting anyway lol.

My whole issue is to be as non-judgmental as possible. I don't want to be one of those mean and nasty ex-smokers if I can help it. (We all know the type I'm talking about lol). I've been very fortunate this week that I haven't been directly around any other smokers so I really haven't had to face this issue yet. I'm curious to know how others handled their relationships with friends who smoke after they themselves had quit. Thanks.

Wargod

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 11:24 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Tash, while I was quitting, I just let my smoking friends know, it wasn't them, it was me. I didn't expect them to quit, or to stop around me just because I was, but they had to understand that for awhile I couldn't sit with them while they smoked. Sometimes, especially at work where people were allowed to smoke in the lounge, I'd just go sit outside while they smoked.

Once I got passed the...OMG I NEED A CIGARETTE PHASE, I was ok to hang out with my smoking friends. Most the time I don't even think about it when I'm with them now, and I never bug them about quitting. I'm a firm believer that no one will quit until they are ready to quit, so I keep my mouth shut. If they were to ask questions, I'd answer...yes, it was hard, yes, I had some rough times, no, I didn't stop craving them, but only when asked.

It might be easier to stay away from those friends for awhile, but sometimes what helps or hurts one person doesn't affect others that way. I had one friend who quit, and from his last cigarette on never had a problem hanging out with the smokers. I know for me, I couldn't have done that at the begining, but it wasn't a problem after that for me.

Keep up the good work, it sounds like you're doing great!

Jagger

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 12:22 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Tasha I have the same problem as you, almost everyone I hang with smokes. I have basically told them all that when I do quit they will no longer be able to smoke in my house. I also told my roommate that and it didn't work, he continues to smoke, so I have just had to accept that people will smoke in front of me and I have to keep telling myself no no no.

I do avoid the smoking break room at work, which is really hard because those are the people I talk to and the only time I get to talk to them is while I am on break. In my case quitting smoking has also cost me the little bit of sanity I had left at work. I am hoping that in time I will be able to go back into that break room, but for now I just stay in my area and play around on the computer.

Kitty54

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 12:45 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
I watched my family members die from lung cancer. Still I smoked. Since 1965. My health has gotten worse and worse. Finally, these words, from the Bible, became real, to me - "I call heaven and earth to record that this day, I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing, now choose life that you and your children may live". That means I can choose not to smoke. I haven't had a cigarette since Oct 26. I wish I could encourage everyone, who's trying to quit, but I'm STILL struggling. I really want to smoke and I'm terrified to go around smokers. Sometimes I pass a stranger, who's smoking, and it's all I can do to turn away. Maybe Dahli has the point I'm missing - it's a "chain around my drowning neck". You see, I've been smoking so long I don't remember how to live without a cigarette. My health has suffered and I can't live if I continue my affair with tobacco. This addiction is so strong, in me, it feels like tenticles in my brain. I'm disabled and homebound, so it's hard to get really involved with something and forget. I smoked 3 packs a day. Everything I do, at home, involved an ashtray. Dont' think I haven't prayed or that I don't know the physical, emotional and spiritual ramifications. Sorry, I'm rambling. This I can give those of you who have been smoking for less than 20 yrs., the longer you wait, to quit, the more damage is done and the harder it is.

Dahli

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 01:08 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Oh Kitty - my heart breaks for you and I wonder have you gone back and read much of the archives of this thread - there is a lot of good information and support that might give you a few more tools to fight this monster. I smoked two packs a day and when finishing the book Lumbele referenced quit without a twinge without an urge and without one craving two years later it's still the same and all I feel for others is sadness when I see them smoking... it really is doable to kill the monster and until then even though you aren't smoking, you're freedom is still not complete.... {{{{Kitty54}}}}

Kitty54

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 01:19 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
I just printed the book info you gave. Yes, this helps. I've gained 11 lbs, which I really couldn't afford! I think that's discouraging, but I know that's better than the smoking. I'm going to go read "Chapter Six" and see if I can change the way I think about smoking. Thanks Dahli.

Llkoolaid

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 01:47 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Dahli, I found your book on a clearance table, and I am in the process of reading it. It makes so much sense, and I am only on chapter 13. People please get this book, and please be open minded. I know you were giving me tips from it when I quit Dahli and they helped but it would have been so much easier if I had of read the whole book. October 20th 2001 was the day I quit I think, somewhere around that but you are right I don't think my freedom from cigarettes will be complete until I finish this book. It has changed my way of thinking about cigarettes and is answering some questions that I often couldn't answer. I continue to be afraid that I will start smoking again, this book is taking that fear away.

Dahli

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 02:23 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Oh Kitty I know, I gained more than 20 when I quit and in the last couple of months have gotten to the point where now that I care enough about my self to stop 'sticking dead leaves in my mouth and setting them on fire' I am also learning to feed myself properly. I totally stuff myself with all the fresh fruit and veggies I can lots of salad with olive oil and lemon, eat lean protein like turkey breast, shrimp and fish, avoid dairy, wheat, sugar and bad fat and have already dropped 7 and feel so much better. Come on over to the exercise log too, all I promised is to walk 2 miles a day and by posting there every day I do!
I think it's all tied together, cuz self abuse can take all forms but taking care of yourself can be very very wonderful and I wish that for you too!

LL!! I am so excited for you and isn't it amazing how it changes the way your 'head' sees it??!
You may remember when I said my husband, my sister, my MIL and my Dad's wife also read the book and quit just as easily and we still get giddy when we get togethe and realize how great this is! I hope you let me know what you think when you're done!

Juju2bigdog

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 03:05 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Oh, Kitty, you poor thing, quit since end of October and still suffering so much. Were you able to get a patch? If you have just been doing it cold turkey and are still feeling so bad, maybe you should see about getting a patch for a while. It really does take away the physical cravings.

Tash - the friend. I'd make him smoke outside by himself if it were me. Give him an ashtray and tell him to go ahead. Outside. Believe me, he will understand that you no longer want cigarette smoke in your house.

Tash - the patch. For some reason the patch is not nearly as addictive as you might think. It takes away the physical cravings almost immediately. After a while you can step down to a patch of lesser strength or even cut them in half and wrap up the other half to wear tomorrow. For me, I was done with the patch when the itch was more annoying than doing without whatever relief I was getting from it.

And yes, after a while, but not just yet, you can start to feel sorry for people who still HAVE to smoke. You are about to be FREE!!! Yay!!! You no longer HAVE to smoke.

Hang in there, Kitty54. Come here every day if you have to.

Kitty54

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 07:17 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
I was on the patch for the first 3 weeks. For me it's more of a lifestyle that I'm having to change. They say it takes 21 days to break a habit and some say we don't break habits, we just replace them. I'm not that familiar with the boards. I'm going to try to find the title of Dahli's book and I'll go try to find the exercise thread.

Juju2bigdog

Friday, January 17, 2003 - 08:29 pm EditMoveDeleteIP
Kitty, there are several ways to navigate the boards. Up at the top of the page is something called Topics. You can click on that and see what different areas there are on the board and then click any of them that interest you. This is a HUGE place. Congratulations for finding this thread.

The feature that a lot of us oldtimers use is New Messages, also at the top of this page as NEW MSGS. Go in there and set it to All Topics. Then enter your name and password and select messages since I last checked (this is best if you check once a day or so; it you leave it longer than that, you might get a gazillion messages). It will show you all the topics that are currently being discussed and sort of give you a little introduction to what people are talking about in them.

Exercise thread is under General Discussions.

Sounds like you might be ripe for Dahli's book. She will be back in here to tell you about it. Maybe you can find it on ebay!

Good luck.

Fruitbat

Saturday, January 18, 2003 - 04:23 am EditMoveDeleteIP
I am ready to quit now. Dahli, what is the name of that book. On a quick scan of the archives I can't find it.

Juju2bigdog

Saturday, January 18, 2003 - 06:18 am EditMoveDeleteIP
Yay, Fruitbat!!!

Dahli

Saturday, January 18, 2003 - 08:52 am EditMoveDeleteIP
HOO HOO!!! Ms Bat - I'm doin' the happy dance in my chair.
The book is called Allan Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking, and even though my ex sent it to me I read it anyway and have gone on to buy a copy for everyone I loved who smoked and the 4 out of 5 that have read it QUIT!! - now two years later he still buys them as gifts for people because it's so darn effective. Unfortunately supplies appear to be dwindling. I have typed out a few chapters and would be happy to post them if anyone wants and no-one objects. Like LL said it's an amazing read.
If there are no more, we may have to start the traveling book club - where it gets sent from TVCH'er to TVCH'er ;-))

Kitty - you're right, I've heard that too, you don't break habits, you replace them but the biggest thing for me, was my head finally 'getting' it and that's what the book seems to do, the brain is so powerful that there is no way you want to smoke once you understand the dumb reaons you were doing it in the first place... it's like DOH!

Dahli

Saturday, January 18, 2003 - 08:58 am EditMoveDeleteIP
I think the reason ex-smokers get so excited when someone chooses freedom is cuz we feel that joy all over again knowing their lives are going to be so wonderfully different it's like we're helping to abolish slavery one smoker at a time!!

Fruitbat

Saturday, January 18, 2003 - 09:07 am EditMoveDeleteIP
It is out of print. I asked Amazon to try and find a used copy but that is probably unlikely. Dang! I really want this book!