SONG PARODY - if you don't remember this song, you're too young!
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SONG PARODY - if you don't remember this song, you're too young!
Kahlua | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 11:59 am  For those of you who don't remember this song, I'm dating myself. The song is IF, by Bread. If a phone call could say a thousand words Than I will vote for you And all the votes will show How much we hate you so.... If you were not so scheming than you might not have to go But you moaned and you whined Don't let the door hit your fat behind.... And when, Karen, Chen reads your name out loud Then you must leave - Go face the live audience crowd.... When they show you who voted and you see it was Jamie, I hope that you'll feel bad For making Curtis feel so lousy... When they show you how you acted being b itchy, being mean - Stabbing others in the back Will you blame bad editing? Oh, I can't wait to see the last of you - Yes banishment day means Karen's gone away...... |
Zachsmom | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 01:18 pm  is the song "IF" or "Time in a bottle??" |
Kahlua | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 01:32 pm  No, it's IF, by Bread. Although, I do love the song TIME IN A BOTTLE as well(hmm, future parody, perhaps?). IF is the slower one - here are the words (I think I remembered them properly).... If a Picture paints a thousand words Than why can't I paint you? The words could never show, the you I've come to know.... If a face could launch a thousand ships than where am I to go There's no one home but you - You're all but left me too... And when, my love, your life is running dry You come and poor, yourself on me..... If a man could be two places at one time, I'd be with you. Tomorrow and today beside you all the way.... And when, my love, the stars will all go out Than you, and I Will simply fly away..... |
Zachsmom | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 01:35 pm  I love both those songs.. gosh my age is showing huh?? anyone who doesn't know the songs...you're right.. you 're too young.. and we hate you..;0) |
Needmylifeback | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 03:40 pm  I loved "If" when I was a teen...so now you know what decade I'm in! Great parody... For time in a bottle...how about 10 in a house????? |
Penguin | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 05:25 pm  "Dye In A Bottle", by Brittany ------------------------------------- If I had some dye in a bottle I'll tell you what I'd like to do... I'd take all the curls off of my sweet Joshy's scalp, And I'd turn Chicken George's hair blue... (Okay, okay. Straightener isn't dye. But. |
Wenko | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 05:47 pm  Woo-hoo! I'm finally too young to remember a song! Sorry, I worked with teens for two years and was constantly reminded how old I was(especially since none of them were alive when Star Wars came out!) |
Kahlua | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 07:28 pm  Dye In A BOttle! Love it - you should go with that, Penguin! Do a whole song! I'd read it - I love these parodies. |
Penguin | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 07:50 pm  Maybe if I get some free time tomorrow I'll work one up, Kahlua. |
Zachsmom | Monday, August 14, 2000 - 09:34 pm  LOVED the dye in a bottle..heehee.. |
Palladin | Tuesday, August 15, 2000 - 08:16 am  "IF" came from the era (I remember it well) when you could play a jukebox for a nickel! Frank Sinatra also had a great recording of it. Here's my challenge to you very creative folks. How about a parody of "Send In The Clowns"? Or perhaps for Karen, "You Don't Send Me Flowers Anymore". |
Penguin | Tuesday, August 15, 2000 - 11:55 am  Oh, Send In The Clowns is easy enough. This started out as a plea to the voting public (vote out the clowns) but got all dark and deep and stuff! *lol* Who Are The Clowns (with deepest apologies to Stephen Sondheim) --------------------------- Isn't this fun, aren't they a bunch Eight people locked in a house, drunk on homemade punch They're acting like clowns... Isn't it sweet, don't you approve Brittany wonders why Josh Won't make the first move She looks like a clown, a pink fuzzy clown Just when we stopped drinking at night Finally learning Big Brother is right Doing what we're told to do with our usual groans The rules have changed, It's stopped feeling like home Trusting CBS was our fault, we fear We thought they'd care for our psyches... "So sorry", we hear But where are the clowns They've stopped acting like clowns Just real people with fear Isn't it strange, isn't it weird Losing our wishes to win this late in our time here But who are the clowns Julie Chen is the clown We've killed her career (It scans reasonably okay but you have to make sure that Brittany is triple-syllabled, not elided to brit-ney. I switched from third person to first person between the 2nd and 3rd verses, too, but didn't feel like fixing it. ) |
Ccc | Tuesday, August 15, 2000 - 12:58 pm  Great stuff guys Penquin - Never thought "Send in the Clowns" could make me laugh at the end. Thanks - I needed that. Cause I just realized, too, that I remember 5 cent jukeboxes (and the same for a real bottle of coke).  |
Palladin | Tuesday, August 15, 2000 - 01:13 pm  Penguin: Thanks a million. Wish I could do stuff like that. You made my day. |
Kahlua | Saturday, August 12, 2000 - 09:03 pm  Oh, Karen, she is just frightful She is mean, and she's so spiteful... No matter how the voting goes - She's a 'ho, she's a 'ho, she's a 'ho! She just glares at Cass and Curtis The houseguests think "When will she hurt us?" They can't wait until Wednesday's show - 'Cuz out she'll go, out she'll go, out she'll go! Just imagine her shocked surprise When she learns it was Jamie did her in - Will she ever realize She never had a chance to win! Oh - Josh and Cass are still in the runnin' 'Cuz Karen, she had it coming - The lesson here: don't ever blab, Don't be a #itch, complain or backstab! |
Kahlua | Friday, August 11, 2000 - 09:42 pm  Apologies to the Beatles MAKING KAREN SCREAM As we watch her on the tube We have to hate her...she is so rude... So we chortle with glee When she becomes a banish-eee.... Chorus: We all want to watch Karen go beserk She's acting like a jerk She's got that stupid smirk.... We all want to see Karen go insane... Her ramblings are inane.... Let the other guests remain.... As she sucks back nicotine She mopes and whines, she is obscene. She and she cries... She shoots pure evil from her eyes... We all want to see Karen go beserk...(repeat chorus and fade....) |
Fishhead | Friday, August 11, 2000 - 10:36 pm  May I add a new chorus? She is giving George the evil eye And she's blaming the wrong guy - When she's voted out she'll cry! Curtis better stay out of her way - She may kill him one day For what he DIDN'T say! When you're voted out next week I hope counselling is what you'll seek You have brought on your own doom You belong in a padded room... (back to chorus one or two...) |
Grathblagg | Friday, August 11, 2000 - 10:55 pm  When she's banished -- as well she should, She'll find her husband packing wood, With a 'Ho in their wedding bed, After taking offense at what she said. <Chorus> And her kids, they couldn't care, They're through pulling out their hair. One of them becomes a biker queen, Convinced that "skank" is in her genes... |
Kahlua | Wednesday, August 16, 2000 - 06:19 am  Okay. I realize I have a problem. I am turning into a parody machine. I can't listen to a song at all anymore without changing the words to reflect me pathetic obsession with BB! Yikes. I think I may be joining Karen at the psych. ward... Anyway, here's another parody for you - to the tune of: The PINA COLODA SONG I was watching Big Brother Like I usually do Britt'ny was crying George's hair was smurf blue Eddie was sleeping Cass was saying "um hmmm..." Curtis was laughing - Karen's glaring at him. Jamie just sat there With her sweet vacant grin Poor Joshie just laid low 'Cuz he's in shet again... Chourus: If you like watching Big Brother If you don't miss a show If you visit the websties Then you're a Big Brother 'ho If you're not making love at midnight 'Cuz you're posting a thread Then you're a Big Brother addict And you'll soon be brain-dead.... Chaquita is barking, The chickens, they cluck Eddie's awake now Saying "F@#k, F@#k, F@#k, F@#K!" Karen is dying for just one cigarette And Britt, she's still crying - She hasn't stopped yet.... And here I sit watching Living vicariously Thinking they're all nuts Thinking Karen's crazy - Hoping Britt soon gets voted out - Then the hairs crawl on my nape I'm a Big Brother Addict! Someone, help me escape! (sax solo) Chourus: If you like watching Big Brother If you don't miss a show If you visit the websites Then you're a Big Brother 'ho If you're not making love at midnight 'Cuz you're posting a thread Then you're a Big Brother addict And you'll soon be brain-dead.... |
Kahlua | Thursday, August 17, 2000 - 06:52 am  Song parody to Bare Naked Ladies ONE WEEK It's been six weeks since they went inside 10 perfect strangers and no place to hide Cameras and mics are everywhere Recording them, placing them in the public glare Just last night, Karen was voted out It made me so happy I thought that I would twist and shout! Hold it now - who will the vote next? I think that's Britt's next Because she's looking like aquaman! They can't eat fish, though it's delish 'Cus Cassandra is allergic They don't like sushi 'Cause it's never touched a frying pan. George has gone and got the blue hair But he just don't care There's something off about that man Josh is glad that he is staying and Britt is praying, that he'll be laying her real soon If he was smart he wouldn't do so She's like a black hole Sucking all the sense right out of him. I am hoping Eddie's gonna break, Give Josh a stinking, aching shake That's a site I would savour! Gotta see the show, 'cause then you'll know Their paranoia's gonna grow Cause it's so dangerous they all had to sign a waiver! How can we help it if we think it's funny and it's sad? All I have to say is Jamie isn't that bad! I am the kind that laughed at Karen's funeral And you won't understand what I mean Unless you watch the show. I have a tendency to think this show is perverse I have a history - I watch it like an addict! It's been six weeks since they first came in, Now Mega and Jordan are gone and so is Karen! It was five shows since they voted for her We hoped she'd have a meltdown live on the air But Big Brother seemed to change the rules Karen got to talk to Curtis And she apologized 'Cuz he didn't vote for her She told Jame 'I know you voted me But I'm happy I'm out And America loves me!' "Cluckity-cluck" go all the chickens If they had a deep fryer, they'd be finger-licking Lying in the lovebed with no lights on They're dans la maison And Brittany's hair is infared! Big Brother is there, he makes them frantic They act like half-wits Because they want to win the money Hold it now - who will the vote next? I think that's Britt's next Because she's looking like aquaman! George has gone and got the blue hair But he just don't care There's something off about that man Josh is glad that he is staying and Britt is praying, that he'll be laying her real soon I am hoping Eddie's gonna break, Give Josh a stinking, aching shake That's a site I would savour! Gotta see the show, 'cause then you'll know Their paranoia's gonna grow Cause it's so dangerous they all had to sign a waiver! How can we help it if we think it's funny and it's sad? All I have to say is Jamie isn't that bad! I am the kind that laughed at Karen's funeral And you won't understand what I mean Unless you watch the show. I have a tendency to think this show is perverse I have a history - I watch it like an addict! It's been six weeks since they first went in 10 perfect strangers thinking each of them is gonna win. Six weeks they still have to go And just you watch, the paranoia's gonna grow They will sit there in the living room Banishment day will bring them lot's of gloom and doom It was yesterday that I realized I really want the chickens to take home the prize. |
Steveinbc | Sunday, August 13, 2000 - 03:54 pm  George's Camp Song (to "Hello Mudda, Hello Faddah" Hello children, hello mudder.. here I am at Camp Big Brudder Camp life here is like, soooo not cool… I tease the kids with farting noises in the pool! Did some baking, with a girl named Karen, Eight whole pies for, the group to share in… But did they like 'em? I have my doubt… They gagged and choked and belched and puked their brains out. My best buddy, his name is Ed… Has been spending, most days in bed.. And while old Ed is cool and funky.. Each night he plays a game called, 'Spank the Monkey'… Cassandra's talking, I just adore her She's our campground, Dr. Laura… She makes sure things, don't corrupt us Like last week a guy caught 'Curtis Interruptus'… Oh, take me home, my luvva.. Take me home, I hate Big Brudda... I'm soooo covered with ants and dye and dog hair and chicken poop… Pleeeease take me home, I promise I will not make noise or crap up on the roof… Wait a minute... the sun is beaming… Josh quit sulking. Jamie's schemeing… Brit's spooning Chicita... gee, that's bedda! Children, Teressa, kindly disregard this letta! |
Lzor | Wednesday, August 16, 2000 - 05:04 am  Thanks, Kahlua! I totally don't know what's up with that. Everytime I try to start a new thread, it disappears when I try to post it! Anyway, here's my silly little song, sung to the tune of American Pie... A long long time ago, I remember how Josh used to smile. And I knew that if he tried he could eat a bunch of pies Then maybe karen would shut up for awhile... But the pies they made him hurl lucky puke didn't hit the girls Bad news for his tummy, the pies aren't even yummy I can't remember if George clucked when he knew that Josh was out of luck Damn, those pies they really sucked the day that Josh ate pies... So bye bye nasty Big Brother pie put the pie down in my tummy and my tummy said "why?" I better not puke or Brittney will cry Singing this'll be the day I eat pie This'll be the day I eat pie Did you kick that nasty pug And when you look at Karen do you think Ug? That's ok, so do all of us... Did you go and shave your chest And do you really like Jamie best even with her great big chin? Well I know that you just want a piece cuz you've tried to hump the green haired beast What could you be thinking? Oh right, you were power drinking... While Jordan just pontificates Our little Britt she acts so chaste Poor old Josh can't get a date So instead, he'll eat some pie... |
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