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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:27 am
I am just confused as to why Kate is so ridiculed for having/wanting a reality show when there are so many others with children on them....19 and Counting, Little People/Big World, Table for 12, Tori and Dean, Kimora, Kendra...why is Kate the only one who is self serving and should be banned???
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Cinnamongirl
Member
01-10-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:32 am
Oh the horror!! Kate actually goes to get a tan and a manicure on her first day back after DWTS....going while Jon is with the kids. How dare she??!!! I mean really..... where does she get off **major eyeroll** Maybe she couldn't change the visitation, but seems like she would do less pampering things and relax either way. Guess not What exactly are you saying? that she should not get her nails when Jon has the kids? Isn't it better than doing it while she has the kids..or maybe she shouldn't while she doesn't have the kids cuz she should be relaxing and doing things we want her to do..I don't get it.
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Shenanagon
Member
07-28-2009
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:40 am
Manicures aside, her lifestyle is better than most of us have it. I don't begrudge anyone pampering themselves, heck if it feels good and doesn't hurt anyone I'm all for it. Kate's long suffering poor me routine is a turn off and comes across, to me, as pouring it on a bit thick when in fact her life isn't shabby at all. She has stayed at the Wilshire in Beverly Hills, has a promising career going on tv and she has 8 healthy children. In the grand scheme of being a single mother she's doing fantastic compared to most struggling single mothers. I don't begrudge her, just wish she'd pity herself less in public and smile and be happier about her life.
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Hukdonreality
Member
09-29-2003
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:44 am
Bad Mom for being on DWTS and not being with them all day Bad Mom for having aspirations other than nursing Bad Mom for getting a tan and some pampering Bad Mom for considering another show that includes the children and heaven forbid may provide them with financial stability and maybe some freebie trips and products Bad Mom for doing anything I guess. Can a single person here show that they have even one tiny speck of first hand knowledge about Kate or her children and how they live their lives when they're not under the microscope? NO, yet Kate continues to be labled as a woman who does bad things, makes bad choices, is selfish, cold, and fake. None of it matters, not any of the support, not any of the negativity. Kate Gosselin has a great big scarlett letter on her forehead. Good God, if something should happen to that woman while driving or whatever, will we have actual cheering going on? She has been tried and convicted in a country that says we're innocent until proven guilty.
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Kittyab
Member
07-15-2005
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:49 am
Huk, Kate can blow her nose in public and she will be critized. I dont pay attention to it. It should be interesting to see the new show. I bet the kids have grown so much since thier last appearance.
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 11:54 am
Cinnamongirl,since you asked I'll tell you lolol. What I'm saying is I've done PR for decades, until recently while I'm trying to get up on my feet again. (And with this economny not much PR to do, sigh). Anyway, I guess I always see things 2 ways when it comes to Jon, Kate and the kids, both strictly from the show perspective but also from a PR perspective. I've discussed this so often around the board I guess I sometimes don't clarify when my take is based on PR. Personally, in my entire life, I've never seen 2 people make such a mess of their public images as Jon and Kate. The only thing clear to me is Kate clearly hired a good PR person to at least try to minimize the damage, whereas Jon just is clueless out on his own. It's been painful for me to watch, though I wouldn't want to do PR for either of them, for personal reasons. (The fact being I want to hit each of them upside the head, drag them to a room with their kids and say, THAT is your most important job, please make it your most important focus. JMHO of course lol). So when I said that about the pampering day, I felt based on all that has gone on, it was another huge PR mistep. She's already come across as not being there for the kids and looking to put herself first. To me, when you spend your first day back at home and do it totally pampering yourself, it doesn't help that public image. And since Jon now seems desperate and willing to negotiate, I would have offered him whatever he wanted to trade days, and not only because it would have been better for image, but because I honestly feel it would have been better for the kids. And no matter what hat I'm wearing, I will always put them first! Just wish J & K did! Hope that answers your question about my comment.
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:09 pm
Huk, let me also give you a bit of perspective from a different viewpoint than yours. I didn't start crying 'bad Mom' for any of those reasons. I started having problems during the show, when Kate would always verbally berate and demean Jon to the kids, often with glee. I just don't think that is how you present your partner, and their father, to the kids. It can change how they think of them during their entire life, not to mention how they then act when they raise families. And if it was that bad when they were together, I shudder to think of what is said now in bad times. My main concern has always been for the kids. Second, Kate seemed to always be a control freak. While in some ways it helped with that many kids, the endless verbal spankings she dished out to make sure things were done to her idea of constant perfection always bothered me. How often did she put one twin down while praising the other? Another example of early concern and dislike of her actions. Then as time went on, I saw her spending less time with the kids and more time talking about the kids. I could go on and on with the problems I had about this. She seems to adore the fame, and the perks. Jon seems like a sad, lost soul who has lost his jailer, and doesn't know how to behave on his own. Again I go back to the kids. Bottom line it just doesn't feel right to me. While I may not agree with how my friends parent their kids, I've never felt this strongly that something is wrong, nor have I ever seen any situation where I feel the kids may ultimately end up suffering. And since they invite me in to watch, I do feel I'm entitled to my opinion at least. These kids now also have learned to expect freebies and perks. Well most lives don't give you endless expensive goodies and trips. They go to Disney, skip the lines and just get directly on the lines. Anyone else feel that they need to learn to stand in those lines? It's why some celebs kids insist on it. I wonder if they will all grow up feeling entitled to how things were repeatedly handed to them growing up. What will happen when they aren't adorable and the freebies stop rolling in? Will they be prepared for that? So this is where all my issues stem from. So when I discuss newer things going on, it basically all goes back to this and my concern for those poor kids!
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:11 pm
but could it be that kate is actually trying to live her life rather than being concerned about how she appears PR wise?
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Moderator
Moderator
06-29-2002
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:17 pm
Folks, you are getting way out of line! You are permitted to criticize KATE, or defend KATE. You MAY NOT CRITICIZE OTHER POSTERS FOR CRITICIZING OR DEFENDING KATE. Does putting it in bold make it easier to understand????
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:18 pm
Tex, based on how she has used PR, I'm not buying that. She's an odd mix of wanting to do things her way (image be damned) one minute, then full out PR campaign the next. If I were her publicist I would be tearing my hair out. I never 'got' Kate during the show, and get her less now. But as I said, my ultimate way of seeing this and my concerns stem from what is best for those kids. Bottom line, it just doesn't feel right in the gut when a parent has been away from their kids, and no their first day back spends it away from them on a series of personal pampering activities. Maybe there are reasons she couldn't be with them, but it just feels wrong. Like once again she is putting her needs first. And maybe that isn't right, but when it happens over and over, that feeling gets harder to shake or dismiss. Again JMHO.
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Brenda1966
Member
07-03-2002
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:23 pm
Yes, what Lurknomore has said. I agree with All of it. Kate can't have it both ways. She's into the celebrity thing right now, being on the view, on DWTS. So, every encounter with the paps, be it going to a tanning salon or having an egg hunt on your lawn in full view of them, is a PR opportunity and she full well knows it. And Yes to what Shenanagon said too. Kate would serve herself well to put away the "poor single mom" card as she is really not qualified to play it. I only watch the Roloffs and have seen Table for 12 a few times. The difference to me is in how patient those mothers are. It never feels phony to me. It also doesn't feel like their lives would fall apart if the cameras were gone -- I don't see the star addiction that Kate appears to have. I also don't see those families going through a very messy divorce. I think both of those mothers would have the sense to remove the cameras fromt that situation, not fight to get them back.
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Hukdonreality
Member
09-29-2003
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:23 pm
I understand other's perspectives and accept that not everyone likes or dislikes the same people. I also understand about concern for the children. I'm not yippy-yahooing about a new show that the children might be in. Their cute factor has probably faded away by now, it happens as children grow. But I have always applauded Kate's management of a household with 8 children. Some see her as controlling, and in a negative way. I admire her ability to single-handedly come through that nightmare of a divorce and find a way to support those children without them missing a beat. Given some time, who knows whether she will settle into a less lavish lifestyle once the spotlight fades. If she can't afford to keep that house, I trust that she will downsize when the time is right for her and her children.
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Grooch
Member
06-16-2006
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:43 pm
Are all her kids going to school? Maybe she went while they were there.
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:47 pm
Now actually Grooch, that is a very intesting question!! If that were they case, in this one instance I would feel the blame fell on the tabloid media, and I'd really be OK with Kate doing what she wanted during those hours. (Though I still think for her image they were poor choices lolol). This is why I enjoy intelligent discussions here. That honestly didn't occur to me. And while I may not like much about Kate, my mind remains open to reason! Good question.
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 12:56 pm
Still can't understand how she's a bad mom. Show or no show. Maybe you can explain how you cannot be convinced that she's a good mom. I understand not liking someone and their choices, but preconceiving that no matter which choice she makes she's a bad mom is unfair.
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:04 pm
Escapee, not sure if you are asking me, or in general, but I for one have never said she's a bad Mom. I think she's made some bad choices and behaves in ways that may ultimately be bad for her kids. But I do think there is a difference. I honestly think she loves her kids. But I think she has learned to love fame and the perks that go with it, and wants to keep both, and that's a hard balance, especially since her fame is tied in to the kids. But most of my concerns are mentioned above, especially in my 12:09 post. Also, a lot of my concerns for the kids stem from them being on this show. I worry about the long term effect. But not my place to say she is a bad mother. I only will go as far as saying I think she's made some bad choices, as has Jon to be fair.
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:13 pm
Lurk, I was more referring to this post If Kate goes ahead and does another show with the kids, there is no way that anyone could ever convince me that she is a good mother The constant publicity is the norm for these kids. Heck we are giving it to them here just discussing it.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:37 pm
She is often blamed for doing things without her kids, but those things are while her kids are in school. I definitely think she made mistakes as a wife and mother (who hasn't!!), but I think we are also being manipulated by the press. Last week, one magazine had a picture of her allededly leaving her crying kids just minutes after arriving home, but yet another had her in a completely different city with the kids when the first picture was alledgedly taken. so basically, if we like the mom and think she is a good and genuine person, she can be on tv?
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Brenda1966
Member
07-03-2002
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:39 pm
That wasn't my post, but I'll put my 2 cents in. I'm not a fan of Kate's and I don't think she's a great mother, and not even a good one. But that doesn't mean I think she's a "bad" one. It's not that black and white. I would say she's merely okay. I don't hold her up as any role model for motherhood. I don't watch her show and think "I wish I had treated my DD that way". Quite the opposite. I see things she does or says to her kids and remind myself not to do those to DD. So, while she isn't a bad mother, imo, she's not a good one either.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:53 pm
Isn't that why alot of us watch these reality shows? To either reassure us we are doing ok or that we are doing better than these people. Lord knows, I don't watch "Wife Swap" to get marital advice! LOL
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 1:56 pm
As a mom who works her arse off so her kids have what they need and even a little of what tey want, I get a little offended at people who call her a bad mom. She probably spends more time with her kids than I do and has more time to herself to keep her sanity than I do. I am jealous and wish her and her kids well.
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 2:00 pm
ahhh thanks Escapee...I can't speak to that. LOL now that is exactly why I do put names...makes it easier to know exactly what we are talking bout. But I think you may be wiser! (sorry the owl was too lame lolol). I think there's an overall point we have all been dancing around...not on purpose. I think if anyone chooses to create a reality show about their "real life" they are then not only opening their home for folks to view, but for discussion as well. If they don't want said discussion, shut the door IMHO. I can totally understand how Jon & Kate had no clue what they were getting into. I recall feeling really bad for them when the paps starting following them all the time. But I guess I feel at this point they know the price and if they agree to another show, they are accepting what comes with it. And that is where I think it's not fair to the kids. Cause they aren't getting to choose. I'd LOVE to know what they want, said safely in private. But I doubt that will ever be publicly said, unless and until they write tell alls later in life, which I hope never happens but won't surprise me if it does. After all, that is exactly how they are being taught to earn money and behave as an adult, aren' they?! Brenda, I couldn't agree with you more about how it's not black or white. I think so often folks insist people take a side. If you say something pro a person now you are "on their team," if you say something against you are on the other team. I've never seen it that way either. I think most of life is made up of grays, and this is no exception! And FWIW I also agree with you assessment of Kate. And ETA Escapee, I've always hoped the one thing all of us can agree on is that I think we all want what is best for those kids. I know I care far more about them and their future than I do about either J or K, who I wish would just leave my sight line, computer and the news (ha wishful thinking).
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Lurknomore
Member
07-07-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 2:12 pm
Tex, missed your post. I can only speak for me, but I, for the most part, watch the reality shows because that is what is around to watch. I would choose to watch ones with a contestant/game factor, but I'm less of a fan of the "come to my house/life" ones and really haven't watched as many of those. And when I do watch, it's more because I'm bored and that hour of TV is available vs a preferred hour of a scripted dramatic show. IE I got ALL excited to see a new hour of Treme last night, in a way I never rushed to a show like J&K+8! In a choice of those 2 types I'd go for the good drama. But it's not always a choice. And to be honest this board doesn't help. It fuels the fire in that if I watch something and we all get to talking about it, then you kinda get more interested in what is going on. Plus most reality shows really have become so planned and scripted or staged that it's not really like watching reality. I think a perfect example is Real Housewives of NY. I enjoyed it early seasons when it was relatively real. Now it just feels like they plan out drama and events. That just isn't what real folks do on a day to day basis. Kinda like all the planned outings on this show. We all know they were planned to give us something different to watch the kids doing. So some element is staged. And that seems to carry over to all shows. IE one of my favorite "reality shows" is Cake Boss, as I'm a big time cook and love watching the techniques etc. But as the show has gone on, they keep adding more drama to the mix. Luckily Buddy and his family are fun. BUT I don't believe for a minute much of it isn't planned....ie the crazy bride squeezing the frosting all over his cake then him redoing it. Any baker would have tossed her out and sued for the cake. Clearly that was done to add drama. And so on. Ironically I'd watch just for the cakes and the real naturally fun banter of the guys there! But they don't trust us viewers to tune in if they don't ramp it up IMHO.
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 2:18 pm
Lurk: RE Cake boss and the bride. If that little thing had walked into my bakery and done that, an arse whoopin of massive porportions would have ensued. That stuff takes HOURS of hard work, dedication, and creativity. That would be like painting over someone's masterpiece. Frustrating! Do what you want to it after it's paid for honeybunches, but don't f' with it before that. SHEESHERS. Ok, back to K+8. What I see are 8 kids who have a mother who is active in their lives, focused on creating a positive, healthy atmosphere, nice home, nice things, and showering them with love. Who are we to decide what is positive and healthy, especially after it's been sooo skewed by the media to shed negativity on it that we don't know actually what is happening, but sure are quick to say she's not a good mom. Also, I see their mom looking for a career that is dignified, and would make her children proud and excited to see her in. The kids liked the show, liked beign on it, liked the attention. These are not neglected, abused, downtrodded, sad, miserable little kids. These kids are cared for and loved by millions and their mom is their #1 supporter and fan. She wants to keep that going in a positive way. That bi*ch! ROFLMAO, JK.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, April 26, 2010 - 2:19 pm
That's what's great about tv and this board in general. It's all so diverse!!! I have never had any desire to watch shows where people yell at one another (this show excepted ) so as I rule I don't watch any of the Real Housewives or Wife Swap shows. It's just not entertainment to me, don't post about them either. I love cooking shows but except for Top Chef and some of the Kitchen Challenges, I don't watch the reality ones cause they don't teach me anything and I want to learn some new cooking stuff. I used to love Extreme Makeover, but so many times I feel manipulated emotionally by them that it frustrates me.
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