Author |
Message |
Mocha
Member
08-12-2001
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 11:21 am
Lol!
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 11:33 am
Costa, I finally came to terms with mine in college. After years of fighting with it and trying to tame it I realized the less I did, the better. Unfortunately, mine does not go straight with a flattening iron, it just gets really frizzy and huge. People ask me all the time if it is "mine" and if they can touch it. Not sure what they think it's going to feel like, other than hair, but touch away!
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Whoami
Member
08-03-2001
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 12:55 pm
I've never liked my hair. Not sure if I've come to terms with it or not. More like I just accept it as just another aspect of my existence that will never be "normal" like the rest of the world gets to experience. From time to time I've tried the flattening iron thing, but I don't have the patience or time to stand there forever with tiny locks of hair at a time. And besides, like you Justavice, it doesn't really get straight. At least not silky straight. More like sort of straight but frizzy and hanging down (as much as hair like this can hang down) in a giant A frame of my head. Oh, and wind storms? Forget it. I always envy women who can go out in a wind storm and come back inside with their hair hanging back down around their shoulders, even if it is a little messy. Me, I come in from a wind storm and I end up looking like a cross between the Bride of Frankenstien and Marge Simpson. Isn't it funny how many times we hear people say they wish they could have hair like ours? Pretty much every time I sat in a salon having my hair straightened (which they never call it that any more, just call it relaxing), someone else would be in there getting a perm. And pretty much every time that person would make a comment to me on how funny it was that they were in there getting their hair curled, and I was in there getting mine uncurled! I see the next episode of this show has a challenge of straightening hair. It should be interesting! At least its the next episode for me. Not sure if its aired for anyone else or not yet. I get behind on the DVR sometimes.
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 1:59 pm
Here's that pic Seamonkey took of me at the zoo... Every single curl is natural. That day was a wash, mousse, and let dry naturally (I rarely use a blow dryer any more -- and my hair REALLY gets curly if it dries onm its own).
ETA: Yeah, people always ask me if it's natural. I gotta say, though... having hair like that? When I travel and go thru airport security, I rarely have problems. I mean, I stand out in a crowd like a sore thumb!
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Native_texan
Member
08-24-2004
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 2:14 pm
Costa, you have beautiful hair. The moment I saw you that day when we got off the bus, between your hair and great outfit, I remember thinking "this is a true California girl."
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 2:21 pm
Thanks NT. I never think beautiful, but I do have a lot of it! And funny, but people who meet me think I'm from NEW YORK!! (Except for the colors... I guess I am a bit more colorful than most New Yorkers!)
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 2:27 pm
cost, your hair is breathtaking!!!
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 2:42 pm
Costa your hair is just like my sister's! Mine is more like Foxxy Cleopatra (Beyonce in the Austin Powers movie). I've never been able to get mine to hang like yours even when it was almost to my waist.
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:00 pm
Jsutavice, one word: PRODUCT!!!! And lots of it! Lately, I just use curl-defining mousse, but I've also used mousse along with a curl creme. Lots of good product that doesn't make crinkle hair and a diffuser, and you, too, can have ringlet curls! Back when I worked in an office five days a week (which meant I hadda do my hair every day), I went thru a can of mousse a week. Part of that is because it IS waistlength, but part of that is you do need to put enough product in so that it tames the frizz. So NOW do y'all understand why I will never ever let anyone cut my hair? 
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:02 pm
Oh yeah. Back in the days when I used to wear it in an afro (longer in the back though), and my stylist moved to NY, I didn't know where to go to get my curls cut. So I ended up in National City (basically, back then, in the 'hood) at an afro barber shop. Where they sat me down -- me, a skinny white chick -- in the big front window, picked my hair out (so long I looked like Angela Davis but I dunno if I could get thru a door), and then SHEARED ME LIKE A SHEEP!!!! Needless to say, that was the one and only time I went to an afro barbershop! LOL.
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:08 pm
Oh, mine is definitely sectioned ringlets, hundreds of them. I use a diffuser and I use tons of Frizz-ease mousse and that has been a godsend. But my ringlets refuse to lie down! Instead of lengthening, my hair just grows three-dimensionally. I've tried every product known to man, and that is when I finally gave in and let the afro just do it's thing.
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Mocha
Member
08-12-2001
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:24 pm
Have yall ever tried a relaxer to straighten your hair?
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:35 pm
I considered it when I was younger and hated the hair, but now that I really like it, I wouldn't change it. I could just see myself having it chemically relaxed, wishing it was curly again, and then having to grow it all out over a couple years. I truly like my hair now and love how easy it is to take care of and there is really no maintenance needed. Plus, it is a really unique thing that I think suits me. But if my parents had offered to pay for it, I would have had it relaxed in a second when I was a teen. I was called so many names it still makes me tear up to think about it. Whenever I see a child in the store who clearly has hair that her mother does not know how to care for, I want to just hug the child and say, "I understand and I can fix it." But of course, I don't interfere. I know my mom did the best she could, but the insults, slurs and humiliation still occurred.
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Mocha
Member
08-12-2001
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:45 pm
Ahh ok cuz it was sounding like yall didn't like it curly. Ok carry on. And next time you see that in a store tell them to go to a black hair salon and ask for a very mild relaxer.
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:55 pm
I used to use afro straighteners, back in the day before they had "relaxers!" And in the 80's I did a "transfer perm" (where she permed me, then transferred my hair from small rods to giant curlers). The straightener? Didn't even last a month, and it was really bad for my hair (my texture isn't African American hair). The transfer perm worked kinda sorta, but again, humidity was the death of the larger curls. If I had a choice, I'd probably not wish for curls. They were a menace growing up, were impossible to manage for years when the straight look was in, and until really good products became available, still difficult to manage. Now I'm so used to it, and so used to the attention I get (being 5'10" in bare feet doesn't hurt), I dunno what I'd do without 'em. BUT... growing up with them? All the way until my 30's, hating them? Nope, wouldn't do that again if I was paid to! And yeah, we are really limited as to what we can do with style and cut. The real pisser? My sister? Stick straight hair. Same parents. Or so they say. (Of course, she's 5'1" and has a weight problem, so I dunno! )
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 4:59 pm
Oh.. Sorry. I guess talking about struggles and frustrations from the past got things a little confused. I've loved my hair since college and these days, the bigger the better. I just had to learn how to take care of it and how to own it. It helps that my peers aren't going to call me afro-beehive-bush-head anymore. Also- do you think it would be ok to approach a stranger and give her suggestions for her daughter's hair? I would love to help the little girl (usually they are 3-8 years old), but I definitely don't want to offend or insult someone. I've thought of just casually saying, "I use such and such and it really helps with the texture and look of my hair." My mother was pretty defensive about things like that and she would have been upset if someone said something even remotely implying she wasn't doing something right. Sigh...
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 6:36 pm
*I* was pretty defensive when people would come up to me when I was younger. I think you might try to say "I've had really curly hair my whole life. If you want any tips or tricks for your daughter, please let me know." And leave it at that. Actually, I may not even say anything, now that I think of it. She may not like your hair, she may be offended at the implication that her daughter's hair looks terrible. Nah, don't say anything. Especially not to a stranger!
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Justavice
Member
11-22-2005
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 6:54 pm
Costa, thanks. I am in such conflict about it. I wished and prayed someone would have the answer for me when I was younger. I guess that's why I connect so much with these young girls with unruly gorgeous hair just like mine. I spent my youth having matted hair cut off frequently and wearing braids when my mom couldn't deal anymore. When she was super stressed, I could feel it in the comb she raked through my hair. Tears were of no help. That led to a smack on the face with the hairbrush and more aggressive comb-throughs. The funny thing is that I don't even own a hairbrush now. And I think that's part of why I grow my hair long now. I know how to care for it, I don't need anyone to untangle it, and I love it when it's big and beautiful. And I think it suits my personality. I guess the next time I am in a situation to say or not say something, I will just have to go with my instinct. Anyhow, I can't wait to see the straightening episode!
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Monday, May 21, 2007 - 8:29 pm
And I had my mom giving me perms!
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Mocha
Member
08-12-2001
| Tuesday, May 22, 2007 - 6:06 am
It will depend on the parent. Dahell is an afro straightener? Relaxers have come a very long way since the 80's lol.
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Whoami
Member
08-03-2001
| Tuesday, May 22, 2007 - 6:09 am
Costa, your hair is beautiful! Justavice, your hair must be a lot like mine. I used to have people tell me all I had to do is grow it out and the weight of it would make it hang down. No such luck. It just kept growing upwards and outwards! I have a hideous college ID photo still lurking around. Now that I have a scanner, I'll have to find the photo and scan it and post it. My hair was so tall it went out of the frame of the picture, and it reduced my poor aunt to tears she laughed so hard when she saw it!
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Tuesday, May 22, 2007 - 7:36 am
FWIW, a lot of layered cuts just don't work for curly hair. You end up with the bush syndrome. And although the weight of my hair does help a bit to control it, really all it does it straighten it a bit at the roots. Truly, I wouldn't give anyone advice on their hair without first being solicited. Hair is a very personal thing. You may like you hair big and bushy, but I like my hair with each curl defined. How do you know what that parent will like? (I liken it to walking up to someone who is overweight and telling them how to diet. Please, just don't do it.)
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Tuesday, May 22, 2007 - 7:36 am
Oh, and thanks Who!!!! (Best part of accepting my hair now? I never ever have a "bad hair day". Curls is curls! Hehehe!)
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Smartypants
Member
03-09-2007
| Wednesday, May 23, 2007 - 12:55 pm
Heads up!...my cable guide shows a special reuniun show to run @ 11pm right after the regular 10 show
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Whoami
Member
08-03-2001
| Wednesday, May 23, 2007 - 7:14 pm
I found those old ID's I was talking about. Talk about hideous! Its from about 20 years ago I'd say....
 Kinda hard to see. But you should be able to see my hair rising up out of the frame of the pics! 
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