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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 12:29 pm
Sorry Rehtse, can't recall exactly. Did you see the party with Pepper's friends? Julie said she would have aborted a child with Down's Syndrome, with one guest being a mother of a DS child right there. Plus, she said she had issues with Hispanics, with a Latina also present. I know people are criticizing Pepper for even bringing up these issues, setting up Julie to be confronted, but I am glad she did. Julie truly can't take what she dishes out, as Pepper said. I don't buy her whole shaking, I'm a monster bit, until I'd see her change in the long term. With no update shows, of course I won't. But for the sake of her children, even if she is not sincere in changing her views, I hope the girls can learn that how their mother feels is not necessarily the right, or even the norm, of how the world is. I am surprised however, that both Julie and Judy were pretty decent in their money allocations. I am glad things worked out to that end and Julie didn't send the other family off to some kind of sexuality-intervention camp. However Julie feels in the end, I still have hope that her daughters will be smacked in the face with another side of life, if they haven't already. If not, maybe residents of the town will step in. I have serious issues with the whole sexual-orientation is a birth defect kind of thing. To me, that means any particular part of us could be counted as a "birth defect", be it our eye colour, shoe size, tendency to cry while stressed rather than laugh, or love of cats over dogs. I guess if sexual orientation were a kind of birth defect, then I have more other kinds of birth defects than I can count. To me, the whole point of our so-called birth-defects are what make us different and unique. You give me a definition of expected, uniform, and "normal", and I'll give you a definition of boring.
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Mizinvanccouver
Member
02-22-2003
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 1:42 pm
I'm glad Pepper set her up at the party, obviously having faces to those people made her re-think what she believes. I mean why did she feel it was ok to air her beliefs to Pepper and national tv but not in front of those she has the views against? Her words make her so ugly on the outside. I really hope she did learn something from her experience. I would love it if they did a follow up after the tv viewing so we could find out what they thought of the show and what their lives are like now. I think it would be quite popular.
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Rehtse
Member
08-17-2005
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 1:47 pm
Thanks! Too bad I missed this. I caught the tail-end of the party and never did get why Oregon Mom was so upset.
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Puzzled
Member
08-27-2001
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 3:09 pm
At the beginning of the party, when the guests arrived, Julie announced, not nicely, that she wasn't gay. Then she complained about her experience at Pepper's home. She started the whole ball rolling, and Pepper had finally had enough.
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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 6:43 pm
Read this - a person claiming to be Julie herself posted a defence. Whatever she says really happened (the editing excuse, etc.), there is no denying that those hateful words really came out of her mouth. I can buy that Fox deliberately didn't show the Chase family being affectionate, bleeping out words that were less offensive than they really were, etc., but her rants about Hispanics and Gays and so forth can't be dismissed no matter what context they were taken out of. And you're right, Puzzled, she wanted to make sure everyone understood off the bat that she was straight, like if they didn't know they might jump her bones. http://www.realitytvmagazine.com/blog/2007/02/chase_lane_fami.html
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Juju2bigdog
Member
10-27-2000
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 8:36 pm
Well, I do think of these shows as sort of modern day morality plays. I agree with the person claiming to be Julie that there is a LOT of acting being done on these shows. And a lot of editing. I don't think we should take any of them as anything more than scripted entertainment. I mean, surely somebody besides me has noticed that week after week on this particular show, the supposed partner or parent always has an epiphany where they break down and realize the error of their ways.
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Watching2
Member
07-07-2001
| Saturday, February 10, 2007 - 11:47 pm
Ah, I did miss the very beginning of the show so I didn't hear the part where Julie announced she was str8, etc. Having been part of a predominantly GLBT group which works towards creating understanding and acceptance, I thought Pepper perhaps did set up Julie and missed what could have been a good learning experience for her. Let her get to know the people and then later say.... What did you think of ......? She's Hispanic. So and so has a child with Down Syndrome. This is one reason I was so upset with what you said. I care deeply about them, etc. As much as I cannot stomach Julie's attitude and actions, I saw there was going to be little gained except her being defensive in front of all those people. Perhaps there was a lot of nice things which happened with the group and this came later and it was edited out. Who knows except those who were there. I do think Julie can't take what she dishes out, though! I have to admit I find myself getting more angered and reacting than my GLBT friends who practice their "Gandhi and MLK" ways of dealing with those who attact them. I haven't participated in that group in a while due to financial reasons, but when I was with them, it was really apparent that nothing would be gained from yelling back at those who were yelling at us, etc. (Think "Rev" Fred Phelps family and amazingly, people even worse than them!) We maintained our dignity and while there is tons and tons more to be done toward acceptance, I often saw people who would come up to us and see things very differently after hearing the "screamers" and then seeing us. It made them think HARD and had the "screamers" not been there, maybe they wouldn't have been so upset and reached out. We always commented how in a very warped way, those people who behaved so awful, helped us. It was crazy. I too, was surpised there was no "vengance" spending of the money, esp. on Julie's part. I do agree some should have been set aside for the younger daughter's education. I also think they edit for "shock" value and they pick the people to swap with for the biggest reaction possible. If everyone just got along peachy, they wouldn't have the "drama" for their show. FWIW. It would be interesting to see a follow-up of the Chase family. I wonder when this thing was filmed?
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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-17-2003
| Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 5:37 am
I didnt like the party scene at all. I hate to say it but I agreed with julie. Pepper was hamming it up for everyone and bringing up all kinds of awful topics at the dinner table and WORSE with children present. If Pepper had been a man we would have all been ranting about how he was 'talking over' Julie and how it was his way or the highway. yes Julie is an abrasive outspoken woman but she is not the one who brought up the really awful stuff at the party. It was obvious that Pepper was rolling eyes at everything Julie said (when asked by the guests) and was being adversarial when she had all her friends there backing her. Julie said she would have aborted a child with Down's Syndrome, . the statistics are that around 90% of moms with a positive test DO have an abortion. The harsh reality of the 'birth defect' comment is that it is too complex and politically correct to be labelling it in such a blunt fashion. I did agree with Julie when she said that she was allowed to have her opinion. I really wish Pepper would have taken a gentle approach with her and maybe she would have changed a bit of julie's Mind. the seemingly nonstop bantering and arguing didnt do Pepper any good IF she was hoping to portray herself in a good light. I truly believe a person could choose to "just let it go" and try to have a nice week.
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Annieb43
Member
09-20-2005
| Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 6:53 am
The truth of the party scene was that Fox got names from Pepper of her usual group of friends who they might have invited to a dinner. THEY called them. Pepper was not allowed to use the phone. Fox set the dinner up for impact. Pepper was pleased to have her friends support after days of being under stress from living with Julie. Julie started the evening by making sure that when Pepper said "meet my new partner" that everyone knew she was not gay. Very rudely I might add. Julie then started the conversation about their week On Her Own by saying that they haven't been having fun. When asked why, she began talking about their differing views and then went into her her view of Hispanic's. Pepper's Hispanic friend was sitting there and said, "maybe I shouldn't be here then". Julie asked Pepper to say why she felt the week had gone badly. Pepper told her side. Who exactly is at fault? Yes, Pepper was honest about it all. She was asked to speak and was under the impression that Julie didn't have a problem with her views because Julie had said she didn't care who knew how she felt. Julie went on to pretty much diss everyone at the table in one way or another and then called it betrayal when she realized that her views were backward. She embarrassed herself and blamed Pepper. I applaud Pepper for speaking her mind finally. I would have kicked her out of my house numerous times, but most especially when she screamed in the house for Pepper to Shut the F*** Up! Pepper and Judy do not speak to each other this way. Their children are not subjected to verbal abuse. Pepper was a saint compared to Julie.
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Watching2
Member
07-07-2001
| Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 11:54 pm
Thanks for what appears to be an "inside" scoop, Annie! It doesn't surprise me one little bit that Fox set the whole thing up! I can't imagine it was easy having Julie in their home and with their kids. It's sad to know there are people like her out there in the world.. far, too many.
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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-17-2003
| Monday, February 12, 2007 - 4:04 am
and my point of view is a little different Pepper said "meet my new partner" that everyone knew she was not gay. Very rudely I might add. IF you know someone is uncomfortable with a situation you do not rub their nose in it. Julie said she was not interested in being 'a partner' that very first day. For pepper to inflame the situation by introducing Julie as 'her partner' was a deliberate attempt to start the ball rolling IMHO Yes, Pepper was honest about it all. There is a time and a place for blunt brutal honesty. at a dinner table with kids and adults is NOT the place in my opinion. Pepper made a choice to inflame the situation and instead of firmly stating her own views, Pepper chose to mock Julie's views. Julie was doing a good enough job looking bad on her own. Pepper seemed to relish making her even more uncomfortable. The woman who had the Downs child had the prenatal test and chose not to abort? OR was she surprised like so many of the birthmoms are. Pepper could have let Julie know AHEAD of time that different ancestry and others were coming to dinner.....and , if Pepper wanted to be a good host, she could have nicely asked Julie to keep her views to a minimum since one lady had a Downs child. Even if the producers set it up, Pepper could ahve talked to Julie privately prior to the actual dinner. the dinner was an ambush...pure and simple *** I want to make it clear that I dont agree with Julie's views nor do I feel that she portrayed herself as a nice or tolerant person. However, I think many of us know people like Julie and there is a way to handle them to make them behave in public. Pepper did not handle this situation with love, she handled it angrily and with frustration. I would have LOVED to see Pepper go to Julie's family and the calm loving mom be the "partner" to Julie. I am sure the lessons learned would have helped all.
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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Monday, February 12, 2007 - 7:19 am
I understand what you're trying to say, Sunshyne. However, first of all I think everybody was probably aware of what kind of person Julie was before the party. I don't believe for a second that any of these shows are truly candid reality. Whether by the producer's intents or her own volition, I think Pepper forced Julie into a confrontation, because Julie is so ignorant that subtlety does not work on her. She did not seem to me to be very distressed at the party. She commented that she'd "hit a nerve", and did not seem at all upset that she might have offended anybody. I do believe that the mother of the child with Down's Syndrome knew beforehand about Julie's views, and that Julie was set up to be embarrassed when the subject of birth defects was brought up. But... In my opinion Julie got off very lightly with Pepper. I would never had been able to handle her as calmly as Pepper did. Julie deserved it, and worse. About Pepper introducing Julie as her partner, there have been plenty of women on TS who hated their new husbands and have been introduced as the new wife. I realize that some people find "partner", or same sex spouse, to not be on par with husband or wife. Many still don't see "partner" as being a valid "spouse". Well, too bad. It's time for the world to grow more enlightened and recognize love and commitment wherever it can be found.
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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-17-2003
| Monday, February 12, 2007 - 5:41 pm
She did not seem to me to be very distressed at the party. isnt it funny how we see things differently? I saw Julie leaning far back in her chair with a stonecold look on her face. Then she says something about being a monster. She looked visibly upset to me but then again, I've known people like Julie and they get very upset when their views are shown to be embarrassing/ ridiculous with an audience present. That same shocked look can be seen on the face of Work Bullies when they are confronted by more than one person at a time LOL. Later on it is "poor me" they were picking on me LOL. The fact that Julie was so bothered by the confrontation at the Dinner party showed me that she did realize that she was coming off blunt and wrong. Thx for your post Jodied. I agree and add that I would have had a bad time in a house with Julie as well. Isnt it interesting that we did not see even ONE bonding moment between Julie and the kids?? I would have loved to know if she was equally as cold/ blunt with the kids. Julie had issues probably from her childhood upbringing. I dont think she developed them as an adult.
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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Monday, February 12, 2007 - 8:28 pm
I definitely agree with you, Sunshyne, that Julie had to have learned her ways from her own childhood. I hope that she can see that the world doesn't have to be so hateful, and change things in her life now to break the cycle.
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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Friday, April 06, 2007 - 6:15 pm
Hey does anyone know what happened to this show, and when it's coming back? I miss my TS and Wife Swap fix.
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Whoami
Member
08-03-2001
| Friday, April 06, 2007 - 7:16 pm
According to the Trading Spouses website on FOX, it returns April 12.
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Jodied75
Member
08-26-2004
| Monday, April 30, 2007 - 7:23 pm
Thanks, Whoami! The last episode was so badly edited. They really need to speak to their continuity person. The scene where the massage-therapist mom is alone with uptight dad in the family van - you can see a blanket in the back seat appearing and disappearing all within the "same" conversation.
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