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Archive through March 16, 2005

The TVClubHouse: Other Reality Shows ARCHIVES: Archives for 2005-3: Nanny 911----On Fox: ARCHIVES: Archive through March 16, 2005 users admin

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Watching2
Member

07-07-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 1:27 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
First time viewer here! I've seen Super Nanny, but not this one. I forgot Idol wasn't on tonight. :-) My DH walked in the room just as the nanny was going to the house and he looked quickly and said... "What (WHO!) the heck is that?!" He thought the nanny looked like Robin Williams in Mrs. Doubtfire. I think it was the outfit. LOL

I didn't care for the nanny so much until the end. It was obvious they needed help and I suppose with limited time you have to be stern, but she just seemed kind of abrasive to me at first. It also seemed like on Super Nanny, that nanny appears to get more involved with showing them how to do things and while it hasn't always gone well, she seems to click with the parents more. I'm sure we're just seeing editing because of how touched she was at the end reading the letter, but my first impression was she was a bit less personable.

With 3 sets of twins, I think that woman needs a permanent nanny!

Scorpiomoon
Member

06-06-2002

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 3:21 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Yeah, tonight's episode was quite the roller coaster.

I really hope being on this show helped that family because, I think, it was evident those kids would have grown up with some serious behavioral problems.

I wonder what it's like for these families after the show airs and their family and friends have seen the kids act as they do.

I respect "Nanny Deb". When she went after the mom and pulled her back into the kitchen--wow. And I like how she's completely objective and stands her ground.

Marej
Member

09-20-2002

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 9:32 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I wish they would put hidden cameras in the house. The kids seem to be out of control just for the sake of the camera in their face. The oldest daughter seemed to enjoy almost smothering her brother.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 10:48 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Just too many kids for me to handle, I'd be in a loony bin and the mom just needed a vacation. She was very defensive which I probably would have been in her place. Glad the dad started supporting her instead of tearing her down.

Scout
Member

01-20-2005

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 11:12 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Me, too!!
I thought the dad liked being right so much that he was being extra-helpful in the end just so that he could look good for the cameras. If he had just gotten up and helped her before, things wouldn't have been so bad. Expecting her to keep six kids quiet all day - wow. It looked like they had money from the looks of the house, I wonder why he didn't just shell out a little more and soundproof his office?

It did worry me about holding that pillow over that little boy's head. I thought they should have addressed that much more harshly and made sure that she knew that if she ever did anything like that again, dire consequences would ensue. That boy was literally gasping for air.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 11:28 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Yeah that was worrysome. One of my boys tried that with his brother but I was right there and I lit into him too so that he knew to never do that again. But if I was that mom I would've whipped that girls behind.

Danas15146
Member

03-31-2004

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 12:20 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I didn't think he looked good for the cameras at all!!! Hearing him yell up to keep the kids quiet -- I wanted someone to put a pillow over HIS face!

Though she certainly had her faults I felt bad for the mom -- her plate was way too full and she had no help that I could see.

Do you guys think that the camera crew stepped in at all on the pillow issue? Scary to think of what could have happened if that had occurred on a "normal" day. ITA w/ you Mocha -- that child would have been unable to sit for a week!

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 12:36 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I wouldn't have hurt the girl, I would have explained to her how serious that suffocating could have been.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 1:03 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Probably not Dana, they probably just alerted the Nanny or someone on the production staff to alert the mom.

Scorpiomoon
Member

06-06-2002

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 2:29 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Something is stuck in my mind.

Remember when one of the older twin girls got upset (something about fighting over a toy with her twin sister) and the nanny said something like, "You are the oldest in the family. You were here first." And the girl said, "But we were adopted."

I can't help but wonder if the parents throw the adoption thing around when they are angry--saying things that allude to the older twins not being acceptable because they are adopted.

It just seems strange to me that a nine year-old girl would be so aware and so conscious of being adopted and think of it as being something bad.

Whoami
Member

08-03-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 3:30 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I had the same uneasy feelings Scorpio. Like, the girls might have had some sort of nagging fear that since the parents now had children of their own flesh and blood, the adopted ones might not be as desirable any more. I wonder if they even feared getting "sent back."

Scout
Member

01-20-2005

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 3:55 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I agree, it seemed that the oldest twin that they spoke to, her emotions seemed very close to the surface. When her mother told her she loved her, she burst into tears immediately. She definitely needed to hear that. I would think it only natural that they would feel that way - especially since it didn't seem to be addressed much. Just the way the girl said, "well, you know we're adopted", almost sounded like she was saying, "well, we're not the real kids - we're the second-best kids". Maybe she didn't feel that way at all, but there was an odd vibe there.

Bluejaxrock
Member

04-23-2004

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 8:45 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Wow, I thought I was the only who thought that about the adopted thing. I mean, the Nanny's telling them how being the first borns is special and the girl was like 'well, I'm not really special cause I'm adopted'..I ached for her. For some reason, I can hear one or both of the parents introducing their kids that way - this is A, B, C, D, E, & F, but A & B are adopted. Seemed like the Nanny was especially touched by that, too.

Puzzled
Member

08-27-2001

Tuesday, March 15, 2005 - 10:39 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Yes, I noticed that too. It was so sad when she said, "but we were adopted." It was good that Nanny addressed that.

Max
Member

08-12-2000

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 10:50 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
It's really not necessary for the parents to throw in the "you were adopted" thing in anger for the adopted girls to feel different. When you are adopted (as I was), you can have feelings of abandonment and being "different" and that you could be sent packing even if no one ever says anything. I think that's especially true if you are he oldest kids and the next ones after you were not adopted. Don't ask me how those feelings come into play, because I don't know. I just know that they do. Heck, I still have issues with abandonment and I'm 49! There's some hard-wiring for some of us that somehow makes us afraid on some level that we'll be left behind again.

I hope the lessons learned stick with this family. They all had issues that needed to be heard and I hope they learned how to listen as well as speak up. I do wish they had the follow-up several months later like Super Nanny does. :-)

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 12:03 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Good points Max. I didn't get that the parents pushed a negative aspect on the girls being adopted. I was thinking that the parents just let them know they were adopted at an early age probably because it wasn't something they wanted to keep from them.

Bluejaxrock
Member

04-23-2004

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 2:05 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Thanks, Max, for giving me another way to look at that. The parents seemed loving...clueless, maybe, but loving toward their kids.
It's funny...I'm finding out that the things I've done/are doing with my girls have real "names" to them. For instance, when my girls start whining, I tell them I can't hear them unless they talk to me. "Mommy doesn't hear whining", and all along I've been teaching them to communicate! I'll copy them, "wha wha wha wha wha" and then ask, did you understand me? That's what you sound like when you're whining at me. I'm sure our neighbors think my kids aren't the ones with the problems...lol


Scorpiomoon
Member

06-06-2002

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 2:47 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
...you can have feelings of abandonment and being "different" and that you could be sent packing even if no one ever says anything.

Sorry. I have to disagree. I don't believe in "hard wiring" when it comes to feelings. People have feelings based on perceptions. Something has to have been experienced in order for a person to then make a judgement based on that experienced followed by creating a belief or having a feeling about it. Change the perception = change the feeling/belief. Feelings and beliefs don't magically appear for no, logical reason.

Nothing being said is even worse than negative things being said. If these parents (or any adopting parents) specifically tell their children they are special and welcomed and loved and did so repeatedly (and back up their words with actions), unless the child is seriously neurotic, there will come a moment when they will trust what they are hearing--believe what they are hearing--and feel positive about it.

I retract my previous theory and have to agree with Bluejaxrock's--that the twins were probably simply singled out by the parents without them realizing the damage it was doing to the girls.

But even if it was done out of ignorance, shame on them for not being more in tune with their children and not realizing how their self-esteem was being impacted.



Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 2:54 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Sorry but I totally disagree with that. I do believe feelings and beliefs DO appear sometimes with no reason. Especially in a child.

When I was 9 years old, my dad died. Well, my cousin had been over a few days before he died and shook his hand. For years after that I always thought there was something in her handshake that killed him...

Max
Member

08-12-2000

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:06 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Well, Scorpiomoon, by your measurement, then, I guess I'm seriously neurotic. Because I am an adoptee who was raised in a home where I always KNEW I was adopted and always KNEW that it was a choice made in love, but I STILL have issues of abandonment, even though I was never abandoned in any way by my adoptive parents. And my sister also went through plenty of issues related to being an adoptee during her teen years (can't vouch for how she feels about it now).

If you are an adoptee and your experience is different, that's great. I'm just saying that MY experience is that, even though we were always told we were special because we were CHOSEN, not just BORN, there are still issues around it. Whether they are hardwired or not, I don't know. Certainly they could be perceptions based upon other people's reactions to our adopted status. I well remember kids in school making comments when they would find out we were adopted -- and we know how mean some of those kid comments can be. So it could be that perceptions and feelings were influenced by a variety of external forces or it could be there is a hardwired element or it could be a combination. I don't know. All I can do is give you my perspective as an adoptee.



Scorpiomoon
Member

06-06-2002

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
For years after that I always thought there was something in her handshake that killed him...

And you think there was no reasoning for that? Even though, as an adult, you might examine the belief you had and think it was far-fetched, at the time, as a child, you experienced a great loss and you were undoubtedly scared and confused.

You formed the perception that your cousin had something to do with the death probably because coming up with a reason/explanation for something helps gives us a bit of peace during the times when we have absolutely no control over things-- like death.

Again, no feelings/beliefs just magically appear in the mind--no matter how old you are.

Scorpiomoon
Member

06-06-2002

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:14 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Well, Scorpiomoon, by your measurement, then, I guess I'm seriously neurotic.

Well, Max, honestly, it doesn't matter what I think. If you harbored feelings of abandonment all of your life no matter what anyone said or did, and as you stated, still do, do you think you have some issues that need to be addressed?

Of course everyone experiences things in their own way. There's no arguing that. All I'm saying is that human nature is human nature and there is ALWAYS a a root and an explanation for perceptions, feelings, beliefs and behaviors.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:24 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I disagree.

Bob2112
Member

06-12-2002

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:30 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
<...thinks we need to find the root of why Mocha is disagreeing...>

Lilfair
Member

07-09-2003

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 - 3:33 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I think it's a mixture of perception/nurturing and hardwiring. I have 2 kids that are basically grown. I always thought that nurturing was the key element to personality but after the fact I'm leaning towards the hardwiring theories.

Both kids are great but they basically ended up with the personalities they were born with. Of course any form of extreme parenting or extreme events in ones life can alter the hardwiring. Just my humble opinion.

The twins seem to be within the norm. I’m not worried for them or society.