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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 6:00 pm
My parents were around that age (forty) and I'm damn glad they had me. And they were the best parents a guy could have. I'm just sorry Elton couldn't adopt that child with aids and give him a better life as well.
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Colordeagua
Member
10-24-2003
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 8:13 pm
Jimmer, so you're saying you're an only child too? My parents were good too. But I wish I had a sibling. Would love to really know what that relationship is like. And what would it be like to have parents only 20 - 30 years older -- not 40.
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Teachmichigan
Member
07-22-2001
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 8:20 pm
Is the concern the age or the only child? We have an only child who's a teen now, and he said it has both advantages and disadvantages. The main advantage is that I did NOT want more children, and that is not a good situation to bring a second child to. My dad had much older parents, and he never minded except that they died when he was pretty young (mid 40s).
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 8:24 pm
Yes I was an only child and so was my wife. We now have two little girls and it gives us an immense amount of pleasure to see how they relate as sisters as it is something we never got to experience. No question that we missed out on that type of relationship though I think that by default and necessity it probably resulted in us spending more time with our parents and having other enjoyable experiences. Sure I wish my parents were younger. But that is just because they were wonderful parents. There are lots of people out there with young parents who are simply lousy parents (and there are some great young parents as well). Ultimately though, the way I look at it is it's nice to know that someone really wanted to bring me into the world and give me a life. And that is how it is with Elton John. Anyone having a baby at that age is thinking about him/herself -- not about the baby. I can't speak for Elton John's baby but I assume that he would rather be alive and have a chance at life than never to have lived at all. Life is full of twists and turns and you have to make the best of what you are given. Just look around you. There are lots of people with crappy parents who will probably live forever. And lots of people with lousy siblings that hate each other. Are they better off?
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Bandit
Member
07-29-2001
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 8:45 pm
Color, I know just what you mean. My mom and dad were 44 and 49, respectively, when they had me. I wished my whole life I had parents that were young like everyone elses. We went through quite the generation gap. Now, I'm not an only child; I'm the youngest of 5. But having siblings that were sooo much older than me (20, 18, 12 and 11 years older) I often felt like an only child because 2 of them were already out of the house when I was born, and the other 2 were teenagers and leading their own lives. I don't know, and yet I wish I did, know what the real relationship between siblings that are close in age is like. Now that we're all older, it doesn't quite matter. We're all adults, and the age gap seems to have closed a little. Not to mention that now at 36, my dad is gone and my mom is 82 with Alzheimer's. So, yeah I would have to say that being the child of older parents is not fun.
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Kitt
Member
09-06-2000
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 9:07 pm
I debated mentioning Elton's age too. At 63, and after not exactly living a healthy lifestyle, the baby is likely to lose one of his fathers at a young age, or spend his 20s worrying about Elton's health, during the period where he should really be spreading his wings without a care. And David's no spring chicken at 48 either. Adopting a child is one thing - the child needs loving parents - but I do think creating a baby from scratch is a bit selfish. I know a lot of celebrities do it though... Larry King is 77 or something, and he's got a pre-teen son.
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Hukdonreality
Member
09-29-2003
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 9:35 pm
Larry King can do anything he wants with his son, he has the money to do so (and so will Elton John). But I doubt Elton will be able to rough and tumble with a toddler, or go mountain biking with him when he gets into his teens. When Elton's son graduates from high school, Elton will be 80 or 81. Bleh
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 10:15 pm
My parents were 35 when I was born and older for my brother. They didn't get to start trying for a family because my dad decided to volunteer during WWII and then they found that they didn't easily get pregnant so they were older parents back then. They did decide to stop at two instead of their original desired number of 4 kids. They made it to 79.5 and 80 and probably would have clocked another 10 years each had they not smoked for years. I bet Elton will still be playing tennis though. And I bet the kid would rather be here than not, looking back. Hard to say of course but I'd rather have really great parents for a shorter time than be born to a young and/or addicted parent. (and sure, an old addicted parent would be bad). And then we have the name for Alanis Morissette's new baby son.. Ever Imre Morissette-Treadway
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Colordeagua
Member
10-24-2003
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 10:19 pm
Teach and everyone, it's both for me -- being only child and older parents. (And yet there are even older parents?!) My dad died early of smoking -- age 67 in '73. My mom lived long -- died at 89 in '96. (If you did some math, I think you could figger it out. I'm 64.) Marriage (and kids) were not in the cards for me. No family. Parents had nothing to do with that. (Well, maybe a little. Won't go into that.) I met a guy years ago. He was IT for me. Through the years came and went couple more times. He has been far out of this area for a number of years. But I am a big believer in you never know what can happen -- phone or doorbell ring??? I google every so often. Last April 20 I found what I never wanted to -- obit. He died one year and three days ago -- Dec. 26. Smoking / lung cancer. No boy on the red bike is ever going to show up again. Friends in Florida had two children -- she was 44 and 47 / 48 when. Her husband is 2 - 3 years younger. Planned after 20 years of marriage. Don't know them well enough to ask why they waited so long.
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 10:24 pm
Larry is about 100, no? (kidding, but only sort of) and he has TWO pre-teen sons.. but maybe that is good cuz they have each other.. Chase and Cannon)
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Landileigh
Member
07-28-2002
| Wednesday, December 29, 2010 - 10:28 pm
being an only from a young parent wasn't easy either. didn't help she died at 54 at I was only 34 at the time. i'm 48 now.
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Ophiliasgrandma
Member
09-04-2001
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 6:45 am
My husband was 50 when our DD was born. He died at 54. He was too old to have children and Elton John is doubly too old. It cheats the child no matter how one tries to put a good spin on it.
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 8:06 am
So the child is better off dead or non-existing? You would prefer it that way? I just can't work my mind around to that sort of logic. Perhaps we could find a poll of people with older parents and ask them if they would rather not have been born at all? It's like saying single Moms shouldn't have kids. Is it wrong of Jodie Foster to have children? Given the choice between not being born and being Elton John's son would be a very easy choice for me. I would jump at the chance.
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 9:04 am
Were they unable to adopt?
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Colordeagua
Member
10-24-2003
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 9:07 am
So, Jimmer, you and your kind (males / fathers) aren't necessary or needed in a child's life. The rest of us, children and mothers, are just fine without you? Fathers add nothing to a child's life? In the case of adoption, one parent is better than none. But two is preferable. If you never were . . . you never were. You're not asking if you want to die. If you simply never were, you can't miss out on life. You never existed.
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Nyheat
Member
08-09-2006
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 9:15 am
I'm with Jimmer on this. Once we start picking apart who shouldn't have children, the whole ball unravels. Loving parents who provide a safe, secure environment for their children is all that's required. Parents of any age or situation can either fit the bill or not based on myriad criteria. I'm not a social worker, so won't randomly go condemning the vast swath of older parents just for being older parents. Not even going to address the single mother argument. A lot of single mothers are made so by extenuating circumstance, not by choice. I wouldn't condemn a single mother just by definition, just like I wouldn't condemn an older person who decides to have a child just because they are older. It entirely depends on the whole person and situation.
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Denecee
Member
09-05-2002
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 9:40 am
Nyheat said it all with this line "Loving parents who provide a safe, secure environment for their children is all that's required." If only that was mandatory! I love me some Elton! Happy for him and his boyfriend/husband.
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 10:00 am
So, Jimmer, you and your kind (males / fathers) aren't necessary or needed in a child's life. The rest of us, children and mothers, are just fine without you? Fathers add nothing to a child's life? In the case of adoption, one parent is better than none. But two is preferable. I'm not sure how you got that from what I said earlier. I like to think I'm needed. However, at the same time I'm certainly not going to disapprove of people like Jodie Foster and Elton John giving a child a life. Not surprisingly, I agree with Nyheat. It's all about love and caring. Plus think of all the people that wouldn't be here if older people hadn't had kids. Um ... I'm one of them. So is my wife (who I wouldn't have known). Hey ... I'm glad you're here Color! I like to think that the world is a better place with us in it.
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Chewpito
Member
01-03-2004
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 10:55 am
Well Im a single Mom and my Daughter is just fine... I think I did alright. I know quite a few single Dads also that picked up the peices when the Mom when Nuts or outa control...(it happens to both sexes) and they did an amazing job. And being adopted by Elton' what could be wrong with that....that child no matter how many yrs it may have with its aging parents...will have more oportunity's in this life than most and I doubt will be sorry 'it' was born into his (Elton) loving and very giving family...
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Kitt
Member
09-06-2000
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 10:59 am
Until you make a baby that child doesn't exist. It's not a logical argument to say that person would rather have existed that not existed, if it didn't exist then there is no choice possible. I would be 100% for Elton and David adopting a baby, they can provide well for it and I'm sure will be loving parents, even if Elton's time with the child might be limited. But with many needy children in the world they created a baby when it is pretty much guaranteed that it will be in for an unusual amount of pain in the first 20 years of its life. Yes, sad/non-ideal things could happen to anyone, but to my mind it's a bit selfish to create a human being for yourself when you're 63. I'm wondering if David Furnish really, really wanted a genetic baby (like many people do) and the child is biologically his. That would make sense of the situation for me, although it wouldn't be a choice I would personally make.
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Lexie_girl
Member
07-30-2004
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 12:17 pm
Really interesting article about life inside the Playboy mansion from someone that used to live there. While most people would love to go to the Playboy mansion, after reading this article I have absolutely no desire. I did not realize how filthy and disgusting the house was and I'm not talking about the sexxin' - I'm talking about the carpets, drapes, etc. The link is from the DailyMail UK. Life Inside Playboy Mansion
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Landileigh
Member
07-28-2002
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 12:22 pm
why would this child be "in for an unusual amount of pain in the first 20 years of its life."??? because people would love and nurture it?
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Lexie_girl
Member
07-30-2004
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 12:25 pm
Landi, I took it to mean that because of David and Elton's ages, they would probably die before he was 20-years-old. And if they were alive during his first 20 years, they probably wouldn't physically be able to participate in the physical activities that a young child/teenager might have. I could be wrong, but that's how I took it.
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Landileigh
Member
07-28-2002
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 12:48 pm
Elton is 63, but David is only 48. My Father-in-law is 85 and my dad is 77. Neither seem to be "kicking the bucket" anytime soon. Although my FIL has had some health issues of late, he is always there, and my dad you wouldn't know the difference from when he was in his 40's.
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Twiggyish
Member
08-14-2000
| Thursday, December 30, 2010 - 12:48 pm
NYheat, I totally agree. I very happy for Elton and his partner. They will provide a wonderful loving home. There is so much dysfunction in this world. In fact, there are many dysfunctional younger parents in this world! Why wouldn't he make a great dad? I'm tickled pink..wait blue for them =)
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