Author |
Message |
Beachcomber
Member
08-26-2003
| Thursday, July 31, 2008 - 11:57 am
(((Mame))) MIL has been very belligerent at times (took a swing at a nurse) this past week and the NH called my BIL Sunday night to tell him he needed to come to the NH to calm his mother down because they couldn't do anything with her. ???? Isn't that their responsibility? Shouldn't they just give her a sedative to calm her down during those episodes?
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Thursday, July 31, 2008 - 4:27 pm
Actually BC, sometimes just giving a sedative to cope with an agitated person in a NH is considered abusive by law in certain places. It depends on the situation - IF they are a threat to themselves or anyone else, then I think they are allowed to be sedated. Otherwise it's a tricky thing, as some NH's that are less than savory with lazy, uncaring staff tend to do this to make the folks docile just to make their job easier, rather than dealing with, and a coming up with, a rational, decent solution in a difficult situation.
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Thursday, July 31, 2008 - 4:28 pm
Another mom update - click here
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Beachcomber
Member
08-26-2003
| Thursday, July 31, 2008 - 5:35 pm
Thanks MB! I need to gather more information about what actually happened and how it was resolved. My brother-in-law is not the most forthcoming in telling details, but I am going to pester until I find out.
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Gilda
Member
08-21-2006
| Thursday, July 31, 2008 - 9:04 pm
Yes, Mame, patients are quite often sedated in Nursing homes to shut them up, keep them quiet. Again, happened to my mom who was overmedicated.She was just left sleeping in her wheelchair every afternoon & was so sedated that she developed an eating problem -dysphasia. Had problem swallowing her food & laterlost most interest in eating.
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Friday, August 01, 2008 - 9:33 pm
And another mom update in my folder.
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Saturday, August 02, 2008 - 8:20 am
Beachcomber since you don't have a folder... this is for you! 
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Ophiliasgrandma
Member
09-04-2001
| Saturday, August 02, 2008 - 8:50 am
Just got back from your folder, Mame. What hard days you are going through. I am sorry!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Saturday, August 02, 2008 - 8:14 pm
For OG... 
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Watching2
Member
07-07-2001
| Sunday, August 03, 2008 - 10:18 am
Day is Done We had the calling hours and service for my Dad yesterday. The American Legion came and did a special presentation. I was holding up pretty well until the service. It was beautiful. We had the same deacon as we had for our mother and the things he brought together regarding Dad and Mom, well, let's just say, my lip started quivering and then the tears came. After the service the military honor guard came in. It was breath-taking. One soldier did the precision walk up to the flag and saluted and then off to the side of the room a bugler played taps. It was gorgeous and haunting. The 2nd soldier marched over. They did the ceremonial unfolding of the flag and then folding it back up. Again, something you watch in awe and emotions I can't explain. When the soldiers came and presented the flag to my brother, I recognized the name on one of them. I hadn't noticed anything prior. It was my son's high school jazz band teacher! He played the bugle. I followed them out afterward as did my son to let him know who we were and to thank them. The soldiers thanked US for allowing them to participate and honor my father. Whew. We had a nice gathering at a restaurant afterward, came home totally exhausted and crashed on the couch until 5 a.m. I really can't describe what I feel. Shell-shocked? So much happened in a mere 4 months time. It's going to take a long time to have it all sink in I think. We have the legal things and we have to go through their home of 53 years and it's an undertaking I can't described except to say over-whelming. I don't know how I'll feel about selling it when the time comes. It's the only family home I've ever known. For all of you going through trying times with your family members: One day at a time and as JuJu has said, "It is what it is." You do what you can. I can honestly say I have no regrets in the care we gave my Dad and he's where he wanted to be: Together again with my Mom. It's those of us left behind who hurt. One day at a time for that, too. Thanks for all of your support these last months.
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Ophiliasgrandma
Member
09-04-2001
| Sunday, August 03, 2008 - 1:42 pm
Watching, I hope some of my words and prayers did help you some. It's a strange thing being an orphan. I'm closing in on my 3rd month and it is still odd.
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Oldtex
Member
03-06-2006
| Sunday, August 03, 2008 - 8:12 pm
Watching, the services for your dad sound very moving and your description just got to me. I can relate to the "over-whelming" part about your parents home. My parents house is still full, we have only removed a few items since my mom's passing in May. It's like someone could just move right in and not need much. Freezers still have food, kitchen cubhards stocked, years and years of what my mom felt "collectable" or "heirloom" are all still there. I'm hoping that as soon as our weather cools off, my brother and I can get busy. I have been thinking of you and praying that you get through this time with peace in your heart.
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Biscottiii
Member
05-29-2004
| Sunday, August 03, 2008 - 9:26 pm
(((Watching and Family))) Sounds like a very beautiful tribute. 
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Mamie316
Member
07-08-2003
| Sunday, August 03, 2008 - 11:08 pm
((Sue)) You should have no regrets. You've been a wonderful daughter. I hope that going through the house is an easier task than you think it will be.
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 7:04 am
Great News! Mom's being sprung from the hospital this afternoon instead of tomorrow! Phew, that's another crises over and done with. Hopefully that's if for a while, so we can regroup and enjoy life for a bit. Thanks to EVERYONE who's swung by here with kind and caring words of support, you all touched my heart and carried me through, again. I am absolutely convinced your positive vibes and prayers made all the difference in mom's speedy recovery. Luv you all!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 7:07 am
Beachcomber, Watching: ((Beachcomber)) I'm wondering how things are at your end with your dad. How's he doing? You've been on my mind. ((Watching)) Seems like it was a wonderfully classy and caring service for your beloved father...
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Mamie316
Member
07-08-2003
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 8:16 am
Great news Mames!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 9:29 am
Whoops! Even though the doc called 2x this morning to confirm mom's release today, I just got a call from mom's nurse that evidently mom's NOT being released today as her oxygen levels are not optimal yet, only 83-85%, although she is over the pneumonia. This intrepid nurse who's on the ball told the docs that she's 'not comfortable' sending mom home yet as her oxygen levels dip when they take her off it. So they want to wean her off the oxygen first and moniter her a bit more. And that's the latest update. And so it goes... (Joycie climbs back into her seat on the emotional rollercoaster ride.) Thank God for cautious and caring nurses!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 9:36 am

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Beachcomber
Member
08-26-2003
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 10:04 am
(((Watching))) Thanks for sharing the ceremony with us, that was just beautiful and I love that you knew one of the soldiers. Their appreciation of being allowed to honor your Dad really speaks of what a great generation your father came from. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Mame, that is great news! I do need to get a folder! It is my mother-in-law, not my Dad, that is in the NH, and your thoughts and advice are so appreciated. We went to visit my mother-in-law yesterday and it is just heartbreaking to see someone you love in that condition (dementia). We have come to realize that the staff on Sundays does not have the skills to deal with a belligerent dementia patient as my BIL got a phone call again this Sunday about coming to the NH to calm her down. His next door neighbor works in Admin at the NH and is going to speak with management about assigning her to a different (more experienced) employee on Sundays. We are blessed to have her as a resource.
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Holly
Member
07-22-2001
| Monday, August 04, 2008 - 10:10 am
Sue, the ceremony for your dad sounds very beautiful and touching. I'm glad it was so meaningful for you. Just try and get through one day at a time...it's not easy but you'll get through this bad time in your life. And don't forget to take care of yourself. Hugs!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Thursday, August 07, 2008 - 6:43 pm
Mom's finally out of the hospital and back at the Nursing Home. Thanks to everyone for your prayers and caring words!
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Oldtex
Member
03-06-2006
| Thursday, August 07, 2008 - 8:25 pm
Yea, for being sprung from the hospital. Will pray things go well and you can get some very needed rest.
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Juju2bigdog
Member
10-27-2000
| Thursday, August 07, 2008 - 8:42 pm
Yay MB Mom!!!
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Thursday, August 07, 2008 - 9:29 pm
Thx OT & Jooj! 
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