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Archive through September 16, 2008

Reality TVClubHouse Discussions: General Discussions ARCHIVES: July 2008 - Sept 2008: The only Dumb question is the one not asked (Q&A): Archive through September 16, 2008 users admin

Author Message
Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:17 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
Thx for responding, I appreciate it. Trusts are great for transferring ownership without probate, so at least she will save all that.

Our family friend of over 17 yrs was our attny and he ended up lying to me when my mom died and stole over 10,000 from me, so I dont trust lawyers. I have since become more knowledgeable about some things.

I know most lawyers are great and if she has to call one she will but just trying to save her thousands.

this has been her home for 14 years so she cant let it go into foreclosure or anything like that.

The trust has a successor trustee that will do what the trust says, troubl is trust didnt allow for paying off the loan. selling home is NOT an option.

I guess we can call loan co and just ask some random questions and see what they say

Hukdonreality
Member

09-29-2003

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:18 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Hukdonreality a private message Print Post    
Geesh, here's another thing. Tell your friend NOT to contact the homeowner's insurance company or anyone else until she speaks with an attorney. Insurance companies only have to keep the policies going for something like 30 days after they're notified of the policyholder's death. She will not be able to get coverage under her own name since the house is not technically hers yet. It is way too involved for her to make any of these decisions right now. Tell her to get the lawyer, keep her mouth quiet about things for now, and to hold onto her money.

Hukdonreality
Member

09-29-2003

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:20 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Hukdonreality a private message Print Post    
Pamy, there will still be probate if there are sufficient other assets. Since the house has a mortgage on it, nothing actually will simply "transfer." It's far more complicated than she may think.

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:21 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
re debt...trust already says that all debt must be paid, thats not an issue. just need to know about taking over the loan.

Hukdonreality
Member

09-29-2003

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:23 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Hukdonreality a private message Print Post    
It's not as simple as saying, "I'll take over the mortgage payments," believe me. And if SHE is not the successor trustee, there will be other issues. She can NOT open her mouth to anyone about her Mom's passing...not yet. She and the successor trustee really need an attorney, she is playing with fire. And that's about all I can say

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:26 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
I wk for Assessor, she just has to record docs to transfer title, we dont notify loan companies or anything. All assests are in trust, no probate needed. There is a will for who gets what dishes, jewelry, etc but thats no biggie.

Good point about home insurance, putting that on list of things to do.

damn, looks like this loan shit is gonna call for an attny....sigh....

Hukdonreality
Member

09-29-2003

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 2:33 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Hukdonreality a private message Print Post    
If she isn't the successor trustee, she can't transfer the title. I remember asking questions here about trusts when my Uncle died. Nobody really knew the answers to my questions, so I had to hire an attorney. O.k., now I'm really out of here, lol!

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 3:06 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
LOL Hukd! yes you are correct, she can not transfer title because she isnt the suc trustee.

Juju2bigdog
Member

10-27-2000

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 4:45 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Juju2bigdog a private message Print Post    
Good luck to your friend, Pamy. Sorry I don't know anything about all that.

Dipo
Member

04-23-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 6:10 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Dipo a private message Print Post    
Pamy, she must get a lawyer, sometimes it it better to let everything go. She needs to determine if the property is even worth what the loan balance is. I realize that she has lived there a long time but it may be better to walk away. That is why she needs to see a lawyer.

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 7:00 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
this is her home and there is no way she would leave it. she would be devastated. In todays market her home is still worth over 300,000. It's in the OC, the land alone is worth that :-)

her mom owned another house but still owes over 100gs on it and market is down so prolly wont sell for more than 310 and that house has to be split btwn her and her bro, so even that wouldnt pay for her home. sigh.......I am meeting with her and the suc tr tomarrow, was hoping to have a better answer for her but looks like the best thing to do is just be there for her while she picks attny. At least I can be there and help her understand what is going on. She is emotionally drained and not great w/ppwk.

thanks again everyone! :-)

Babyruth
Member

07-19-2001

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 7:04 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Babyruth a private message Print Post    
Pamy you are a wonderful friend. Best of luck to her.

Juju2bigdog
Member

10-27-2000

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 9:44 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Juju2bigdog a private message Print Post    
You da best Pamy, and as you showed on that car buying, once you get into something you are like a pitbull. Errrr ... never mind that analogy.

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, September 14, 2008 - 10:06 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Pamy a private message Print Post    
LOL thanks! I have been friends with her since I was 19, she has been there for me thru my dad and mom's deaths. She was my maid of honor at my real wedding and my costume wedding(she was cig girl for that one! :-))

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:08 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Serate a private message Print Post    
"Are you a friend of Bill W.?"

I got an email from an old chatroom buddy. We haven't chatted for years, but send each other jokes and funny emails. Today I sent her one about the two wolves inside us all. She sent a short note basically saying "Hi how are ya long time no talk. I just have to ask - are you a friend of Bill W.? I'm at work and just happened to think about asking you so I did. I'm busy now but hope to talk more soon."

Is she asking if I'm an alcoholic? Is it her way of telling me she's an alcoholic?

Rissa
Member

03-20-2006

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:21 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Rissa a private message Print Post    
ew ew ew, I can actually answer something!!! LOL

(found this online)
Friend of Bill W.
A member of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), and therefore (usually) a recovering alcoholic. Derived from the name of Bill Wilson (Bill W.), one of the founding members of AA.
If you are at an airport and have a temptation to head to one of the bars, instead have "Bill W." paged, as code for your need for someone from the program come have a "meeting" with you

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:36 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Serate a private message Print Post    
Thanks Rissa. I know who Bill W is I guess my question is as being somebody who is NOT part of the program, how do I answer her? If she is an alcoholic I want to support her all I can but since I'm not an alcoholic I'm not really a friend of Bill W's am I?



Kitt
Member

09-06-2000

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:46 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Kitt a private message Print Post    
You could play dumb and ask who Bill W is? That gives her an opening to tell you what she meant and why she is interested or to ignore the subject if she doesn't want to talk if you're not.

Rissa
Member

03-20-2006

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:47 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Rissa a private message Print Post    
So you are asking if you are 'a friend of a friend of Bill w's'? LOL Maybe she tried to make it obscure so you would only understand if you were in the same boat? Maybe she thought that the last time you guys were close she was just SURE you would end up with a drinking issue? Hope that doesn't come across as insensitive. If you aren't sure WHY she is asking perhaps the best option is to play dumb and ask who Bill W is?

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:57 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Serate a private message Print Post    
No Rissa that wasn't insensitive but I don't think she really thinks I'm an alcoholic. I don't like to lie and since I do know who Bill W is - even before I looked him up - I don't want to say I don't know him. Been thinking about it. How does something like this sound?

"While I'm not a friend of Bill W. I have great respect for those who are."

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:59 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Serate a private message Print Post    
Just reread your question Rissa. What I meant as I don't want to just out and out say "I am not a friend of Bill W" and close the door on her. If being an alcoholic in AA is being a friend of Bill W then no I'm not a friend, but if I just say No I don't want her to think I'm not there for her. If that makes sense.

Twinkie
Member

09-24-2002

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 10:59 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Twinkie a private message Print Post    
I would have asked who Bill W. is because I had no clue. LOL

Hukdonreality
Member

09-29-2003

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 11:03 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Hukdonreality a private message Print Post    
"Hi how are ya long time no talk. I just have to ask - are you a friend of Bill W.? I'm at work and just happened to think about asking you so I did. I'm busy now but hope to talk more soon."

Hi back atcha! Nice hearing from you and am looking forward to talking with you soon. You have me confused with your question about Bill W. I understand that this refers to people who attend AA, am I right? No, I do not have any issues with alcohol so I'm not sure if that's what you're asking. If you are trying to tell me that you do, please don't hesitate to talk with me about it!

I wouldn't make so much of it, just be forthright and ask the question you want the answer to. If you don't, you'll never know what she meant.

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 11:04 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Serate a private message Print Post    
Bill W. or Bill Wilson was the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 - 11:07 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
I like Hukd's response...