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Eeyoreslament
Member
07-20-2003
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 2:33 pm
Me personally, I've served Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, and Christine Taylor (Stiller's wife). I've served a few BC Lions football players. Other people have also been in, but not served by me personally. A few of the Canucks, Jon Voight, Robin Williams, Sylvester Stallone, Jessica Alba (and her now-husband), Michael Chiklis.... At the place I'm at now (just started a couple of weeks ago), Mel C dined in the downstairs bistro, and she only tipped 8%. Darn Brits! LOL JK. The bill switch: I've done that. When it was a small difference, I just paid for it myself, rather than getting in trouble from the manager. When it was big, I told the manager, and he dealt with it. According to BC labor laws, they can't charge you for dine&dash because it is considered a "cost of doing business" that the restaurant takes on AS a business. But as a server, the restaurant may have to pay for it, but they can write you up, and use it against you if they want to fire you.
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Denecee
Member
09-05-2002
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 2:36 pm
Did they pay in cash? If not, it seems they could be contacted and told that their cards would be charged for the full amount. While at the coast this past weekend, we went to a recommended restaurant but the food was not good. The waitress was good, she got 15% but I wish I would have told her that my 3 egg omelette was only a 1.5 egg omelette and very dry. maybe she figured the food wasn't that great since we left over half of it on our plates. Safe to say that we won't be going back.
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Happymom
Member
01-20-2003
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 2:44 pm
That's awful! Eeyore, have you seen As Good As It Gets? ever have a customer like Jack? lol (only to watch it in the movie tho!) Interesting thread. Eeyore, I have learned a lot from reading this from your answers. Thanks! I also think it is somewhat unfair to tip based on the food bill. But that seems to be the way it is. So that's what I do. I always tip about 20% and more if the service is very good. But if we're eating in a pretty inexpensive restaurant and the service is great, we will tip more. I didn't realize part of the tip goes to the chef/cook. I never have based the tip on the quality of the food. I do say something to the waiter/waitress if it is not good though. Sometimes we'll have $ taken off the bill for whatever, I still tip on the total it would have been even if there is money off or free items...if the service is poor though, I will tip less than 15%. My dad never tips very well, even when he thinks he does. I have thrown down extra money w/o him looking at times. (I don't usually carry cash though.)
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Happymom
Member
01-20-2003
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 2:46 pm
The awful part I mentioned was re: the $500+ bill above and the money coming out of the waitresses pocket.
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Denecee
Member
09-05-2002
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 3:38 pm
and I thought you felt sorry for me that I had a bad omelette, lol.
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Yesitsme
Member
08-24-2004
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 6:41 pm
I think a good server is worth their weight in gold. They enhance the experience of an evening out and I think they should be paid very well. The job itself is difficult enough, but they have to deal with unreasonable expectations on a regular basis...not an easy chore. There are a lot of mediocre and poor waitpeople, but we should make sure that those who are good make great money so they stay in the industry! I am a tip snob....I will judge people who don't tip well. For example, if I date someone and they didn't tip well, I probably wouldn't go out with them again (there are circumstances when I would waive that rule, though.) Being generous with strangers says something about who you are, I think. That being said, I do think that we should change the industry. I would support a service charge being incorporated into the overall costs of the food. It makes sense and is the fairer thing. I tip well, but am not a difficult customer. The pain in the rear customers are also usually the worse tippers and they would be forced to pay more. Maybe it would cause the jerks to stay home. Oh....one more sidebar on this topic. Tip jars for counter service drive me nuts!!!!
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Pamy
Member
01-02-2002
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 7:28 pm
"Tip jars for counter service drive me nuts!!!! Me too!! like the one at Starbucks, they even have them at donut shops!
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Pippin04
Member
10-26-2007
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 8:43 pm
I like the tip jars. I drop in all my nickles and pennies. It keeps them out of my purse. However when I am at a place like subways and ordering several sandwiches and making special orders I make sure I leave more. In my story above unfortunately it was a debit card and it cannot be traced. One thing this thread has done is make me think about how much I eat out.
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Juju2bigdog
Member
10-27-2000
| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 8:54 pm
I live in the Pacific northwest. We have a bazillion drive-through espresso kiosks. They all have tip jars at the delivery window. How insane is that??!?! You are to pay $4 for a coffee AND tip the kids. Huh!
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Eeyoreslament
Member
07-20-2003
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 12:35 am
Denecee - I'm disappointed to hear that the server didn't at least ASK if everything was OK, once they saw you had left more than half of your meal. Usually, if someone is leaving a decent portion of the MAIN protein, I say something to them like, "Oh, would you like to take that home?" an then they say "no" and I say, "Oh why not?!" which usually either let's them say something like they are staying in a hotel and don't have anywhere to put it, or that thy don't like leftovers or something. From there I say, "But was it OK? You've left so much on your plate....." From there, I have done all I can to say I am acknowledging they left a lot, and I would like to know if it was because it wasn't good. It's a BIG rule for me to investigate why so much is left on a plate. Happymom - I do find that as a bill gets TOO large, people have a little more trouble tipping a consistent percentage. Like, it's easy to part with 20 bucks on 100, but it's harder to tip 100 on 500. Somehow, people DO visualize that full 100 dollars, and they just don't part with it as easily. If it's a smaller table, and the bill gets ridiculously big, I start dreading the tip, because it IS harder to still justify that 15 or 20%. Yesitsme - I love you for judging. LOL. Actually, the people I've dated have all known I was a server, so most people who go out with me automatically defer to me for what they should write in the tip. Even my good friends let me deal with the tip. Happymom - I forget what Jack Nicholson's character was like. We did have a guy, Mr. Wilson, who HATED his cutlery to touch the table. HUGE tipper. HUGE. I will gladly cater to your weird little neuroses, if you tip me well. As for Starbuck's tip jars....yeah I don't get it either, but I throw my change in there anyways, just to keep the tipping karma flowing in a positive direction. Plain and simple, HOLDING money doesn't help the economy. I look at it that way when I'm justifying tipping. I forget the economical law that goes with it....is it Keynsian Law? Bah, I forget. Anyways, if you hang on to YOUR money and don't spend it on other people's services, then they don't make money, and therefore can't spend money on whatever YOUR services are. That's the gist of it. And so I tip happily.
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Denecee
Member
09-05-2002
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 10:17 am
Again, I wish all wait persons were as good as you and my sis. I tell you what though, it's kind of embarrassing sometime when we go out to eat with my sister, if the server is a lousy server. My sister gets so pissed when she has a bad waitperson and she isn't very quiet about it. I have to say about the drive thru coffe places and the tip jar, does seem a bit much. I tip my place because they make mine perfect and have it ready. And they are very friendly, friendliness goes a long way in my pocket book, lol.
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Happymom
Member
01-20-2003
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 10:45 am
Jack's N's character had extreme ocd. Only Helen Hunt could wait on him. He did bring his own plastic silverware in a baggie. He stalked her when she didn't show up at the restaurant he always ate at and paid her sons medical bills! He took her out for dinner and started screaming his order across the restaurant w/o waiting for the waiter/waitress to take his order! It was so funny! Eeyore, you sound like such a great server! It is nice that you actually notice when someone has left a lot of food and inquire to make sure nothing was wrong. Any restaurant is really fortunate to have you! I have rarely eaten in very expensive restaurants, but sometimes the employees seem like snobs! And in every restaurant it seems there are customers who act like snobs! That really bugs me! People are people, no one is better than anyone else! (I remember a SNL skit with the actor saying "Take it outside" or something like that. Funny skit! But in real life, snobbery drives me crazy no matter who it comes from.) Denecee...sorry about your omelette, lol!
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Denecee
Member
09-05-2002
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 12:51 pm
LOL, thanks Happymom, the next day we had breakfast at really good restaurant and the waitress was running her behind off, the food was excellent despite the long wait. We left a good tip.
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Eeyoreslament
Member
07-20-2003
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 1:50 pm
Denecee - I'd love to hang out with your sister. I bet she has been more than vocal about bad service, but I ALSO think that she's probably more lenient than the average unknowing diner, because she probably looks around, watches her server for a bit to see how many tables the server has, and whether or not the server is over-busy before she passes judgment. Happymom - I've never had anyone that bad. LOL The thing about serving, is that it is like almost any other craft (that sounds dumb and conceited, I know). Years of experience make you that much better at your craft. You can't expect a 21 year old to be as good as a 32 year old, or a 50 year old server. Gosh, I've taken YEARS to learn what works and what really pisses people off. And it's a hard thing to learn, considering most people DON'T give feedback at all, both from the customer, or the management side of things. And this is ALSO why you'll see high-end restaurants demanding 5-10 years fine-dining experience, from people who apply. It takes a long time to develop a lot of the good habits that you need to be a GOOD server. Most corporate restaurants are just about doing the steps the COMPANY wants you to do to sell and upsell their product, and there is very little personality involved. Corporate brand restaurants are all about numbers, and really objective, quantifiable things like food cost, and labor cost, and the QUALITY of the experience really does get lost in it all. For those who think the fine dining places are snobby, I invite you to look at it a different way. The fine dining experience is not about US the restaurant, it's about YOU the diner. That is why you BARELY see the waiter. Our job is to get our job done by being as unintrusive as possible. If two people are siting beside each other and facing each other, it is my job to pour their wine BEHIND them, so I do not invade their conversation. It is about serving a person on my RIGHT with the plate in my LEFT hand, because an open palm is more polite than the back of my hand (also the difference between a hug and a shove). It's about having ONLY what is needed on the table at any given time, so your experience is about elegance and minimalism, and not about taking a minute out of thinking about your date, to push an unused wine glass out of the way, or having some obnoxious tent card schlepping shitty cocktails in your face. It's about enjoying a night out with a friend, and good food and drink magically appear, without you ever breaking you concentration from your company, or the view of the sunset. Lower-end service to me, is about this obnoxious need to sell me stuff. Starting with the hostess who insists on talking to me about special food or drink specials to suggestively sell me stuff she doesn't even KNOW about. Then you have a server come up with that in your face style, mentioning a specific cocktail and its ingredients to you in hopes it triggers some need in you, that gets them their first upsell. Then it's about the appetizers, and entrees, and then the dessert menu. And let's not forget the suggestion of a skewer of prawns with your ceasar salad or steak, and a scoop of ice cream on your pie. And a last cup of coffee. And each server has 10 tables, and they can barely EVER handle what they have. There are no bussers. The table maintenance is crap....empty glasses are left there, extra place settings, etc. And the politeness and social gauge is completely lacking. You're in the middle of an in-depth conversation with someone you haven't been out to dinner with in MONTHS, yet the pushy server just interrupts and goes "Are you ready to order?" despite telling them 2 previous times that you haven't even looked at the menu. Or...what about the removal of plates while someone else at the table is still eating?! Rude rude rude! Bah, I could rant forever. I'm just saying that the fine dining service is not meant to be snobby, but it's more about the customer only having to engage with THEMSELVES through the night, rather than having to be forced to notice the various elements of the restaurant. It's weird to explain, but once you've experienced it a few times, you being to appreciate it. You appreciate the crumbs being swept from your tablecloth before the dessert menus hit the table. You appreciate the water glass that is ALWAYS full without ever having to look for someone to fill it. Anyways, I don't think I'm a snob, but I've worked for many years to hone my skills, and I think that tenure deserves more money, because it really is a better service. I find it might come off as snobby to someone who doesn't know or appreciate the differences in the levels. Maybe like the difference in the crafting of a Porsche to a Lada. There's a difference there, but if you haven't acknowledged the differences in their makeups, then the Porsche may seem like a snobby waste of money.
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Sharinia
Member
09-07-2002
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 4:16 pm
Eeyore, that was so eloquent I am enjoying your informative (& sometimes lol funny) posts. My dh was a waiter in h.s. and college (incl when we met) so I have some appreciation for these things. He never worked high end tho, just a mid-priced chain. Thnx for sharing!
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Dahli
Member
11-27-2000
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 4:57 pm
My DD sounds a lot like you E, she worked as a server to put herself through university and live on her own at the same time. She hates when I'm anything but overly gracious when we dine out - has a very high standard, but understands and tips well too.
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Yesitsme
Member
08-24-2004
| Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 7:30 pm
I never worked the high end places and never was at that level as a server. I wish I could have been that type....I am in awe of people who can be that polished. As a waitress I was... fun! I never could hold the trays correctly and was always a bit awkward. Once I dumped a pitcher of ice water down the back of a little kid (about age 9)...who, incidently, loved it and laughed and laughed. His family left me a huge tip. (I think they could tell I was horrified.) It was a hotel restaurant and I worked the late breakfast shift the next day. They had already eaten by time I got there, but came up to me and said they were disappointed that I didn't get to wait on them again. I offered to find a pitcher of water to make them feel better! While the bad customers are sometimes most memorable, a lot of the customers I encountered were nice and it was fun to serve them. I met one of my college boyfriends...actually my most serious college boyfriend...when waiting on him. He and his friend left the restaurant, walked up the street a block or two, and he found a pay phone and called me back at the restaurant. I didn't agree to go out with him at first, but did give him my number after he begged. He subsequently talked me into believing he wasn't a weirdo and we went out for about a year. The funny thing about it was I was helping out at a sister restaurant that night instead of my regular restaurant and all of the other waitresses were not nice to me. They gave me the worse tables in the place and were just miserable to be around. My tables got fabulous service because I preferred hanging out with them than back in the service area. So I ended the night with a new boyfriend....and great tips. Early in the evening it had been so bad, it made me especially happy.
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Mameblanche
Member
08-24-2002
| Friday, May 23, 2008 - 7:50 am
Yessie, I LOVE your story! It really made me smile. (I miss you in the folders area btw!)
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Happymom
Member
01-20-2003
| Monday, May 26, 2008 - 9:31 am
Oh Eeyore, I hope you didn't think I referring to you as a snob, or to high end restaurants as snobs. What I meant was that every once in awhile there will be a waiter (I haven't noticed this with waitresses now that I think of it) that will seem like a snob, like we (me and whoever I'm with or other diners at other tables) aren't worthy of his service for some reason. He won't be friendly and just really seems to be cold and looking down upon someone. I'm not describing this very well. At least it doesn't happen very often. It's the attitude of the waiter I'm talking about, not the actual service. I do always appreciate when a waiter or waitress is friendly yet doesn't interrupt much. I agree with you Eeyore that service provided by someone like you is worth more than what you find at the typical chain restaurants. I saw a show on tv a few years ago. They CEOs of California Pizza Kitchen chain were waiters for a few hours or a day. It gave them a different perspective. It was really interesting to watch. As I recall, they had a really hard time especially when it got busy. Yes, funny story! That's great that everyone had a sense of humor about it!
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Eeyoreslament
Member
07-20-2003
| Monday, May 26, 2008 - 2:14 pm
Oh no Happymom, I didn't take it personally. I know what you mean about male servers, and actually, they are the preferred sex in higher end restaurants, because of their aloofness. It's like they don't get as "attached" to the customers as female servers do, and I know I'm being my own brand f sexist there, but it's kind of true. Women nurture, and men don't get emotional; they just get the job done. I know exactly what you mean about male servers.
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Monday, May 26, 2008 - 4:16 pm
I love the fine dining experience for all the reasons that Eeyore describes. What people have to remember is that it is not for everyone. Some people enjoy it and for other people those things aren't a priority.
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Beachcomber
Member
08-26-2003
| Monday, May 26, 2008 - 4:33 pm
I am all for the unobtrusive server. I can't remember which restaurant, but the server actually sat down at the table with us and tried to be our new best friend before even taking our drink orders. Talk about awkward!
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Colordeagua
Member
10-25-2003
| Tuesday, May 27, 2008 - 8:54 am
In the mail today . . . a $10 coupon (not gift card) to Maggiano's. Pertinent paragraphs in the accompanying letter: Please accept our sincere apologies for your unpleasant experience. We work hard to maintain the highest standards of guest service that our reputation is built on, and it is very disappointing to hear we did not meet our expectations. We have forwarded your comments to the Area Director for review and training purposes. Guest feedback is vital to our success and your comments are important. We appreciate your loyalty as our guest and hope you will continue to frequent Maggiano's. As a thank you for your comments, we hope th enclosed will assist with your next visit, and allow us the opportunity to demonstrate a great dining experience. (from) Guest Relations Manager So . . . ?
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Tuesday, May 27, 2008 - 9:28 am
Beach, they do that at the outback, the just sit down next to you and take your order. Usually it boarders on imposing on my personal space.
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Sharinia
Member
09-07-2002
| Tuesday, May 27, 2008 - 10:04 am
I love the fine dining experience for all the reasons that Eeyore describes. What people have to remember is that it is not for everyone. Some people enjoy it and for other people those things aren't a priority. I enjoy it too, altho the funny reality (I think) is that there is no option for getting the best fine food and less expensive service. For example, you customarily have to pay someone $1.50 to bring you a $10 entree and $6 to bring you a $40 entree, even if it involves the same number of plates. You cannot go to a fine restaurant and get the $40 delicious entree and say 'you know, I'd rather pay you $1.50 to carry out my food and put up with a few annoyances' (all of that said, I usually tip close to 20% and don't mind... just sayin', lol )
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