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Archive through August 07, 2006

The TVClubHouse: General Discussions ARCHIVES: Jan. 2007 ~ Mar. 2007: Parenting Place: Tips and Advice for Not So New Parents (ARCHIVES): Archive through August 07, 2006 users admin

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Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, July 02, 2006 - 9:43 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Herckleperckle a private message Print Post    
Tritons tend to wear scale mail armor and wield either a trident, spear, or crossbow.

Site: HERE
Look for the paragraph about Triton (person), about 2/3 down the page, 4th paragraph.

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, July 02, 2006 - 9:49 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Herckleperckle a private message Print Post    
triton

Teachmichigan
Member

07-22-2001

Sunday, July 02, 2006 - 10:48 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Teachmichigan a private message Print Post    
Thanks, HP!! I kept thinking it was "triton" -- but obviously knew that wasn't right when I looked up the spelling! The pronunciation is so close, but the spelling definitely isn't! :-) (DS is thrilled and says THANK YOU!!!)

Too funny -- I had found that very picture you posted when I was googling Triton, but I was googling for an image not a info! DOH!

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, July 02, 2006 - 11:00 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Herckleperckle a private message Print Post    


Carrie92
Member

09-15-2003

Thursday, July 20, 2006 - 12:38 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Carrie92 a private message Print Post    
I need suggestions/advice for a stealing problem.

Some backstory: My dad is 52 and married a 40-yr old Russian woman who has a 6 yr old child, Michael.
(So, technically, this boy is my step-brother and my 8 yr olds step-uncle!)
My dad works for a large construction company and had to work out-of-state last year and this summer is working about 4 hours away. This is a new marriage, so naturally, they don't want to be separated for long lengths of time.
So, in the past 1 1/2 yrs that they've been married, they have gone back and forth from Lexington, KY back home to Michigan. For holidays, b-days, dr appointments and general keeping up of the house.
Now, they are back for good from Lexington, stayed home for a bit, then Dad had to start a job up north in June.

So, Michael, in the past 1 1/2 years, has moved here from Russia, learned a new language, started school in KY, then moved to MI permanently, relocated schools, then moved to yet another new home up north, but they do come back to my dads house on weekends. And now, for a few days is staying with us while my Dad and his wife go back down to KY to tie up loose ends.
Michael has been "borrowing" things that don't belong to him. I only found out today. He had brought some Gameboy games with him to our house, but I know he doesn't have a Gameboy, so I called my dad and learned about the borrowing problem.
Before I could tell anyone else about it, my son came to me with a trinket of mine that Michael had taken.

So, after this long story: Personally, I think this might have something to do with all the moving. That's a lot for an adult much less a small child who doesn't understand what's going on .
Does anyone have some expert advice on this, or a link to some expert advice. My dad's not the type of person to just take my word for it. I'm hoping to be able to print something out for him, or suggest a book.
Any ideas would be much appreciated.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 - 9:01 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
Carrie, all I can suggest is to talk to Michael's school psychologist. Sorry I cannot offer more than that. Except let him know you care for him. Sounds like he has had a very rough last few years...

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 - 9:02 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
I am about to register my son in public school for the first time. What are things I can ask about besides the bus schedule and information about being a room mother?
TIA.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 - 9:10 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
Student to teacher ratio.

Bearware
Member

07-12-2002

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 - 10:41 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Bearware a private message Print Post    
Carrie - It may also be a control issue. I would think it's frightening for everything in his life to change as often and drastically as it has. He may be looking for some stability, or even some way to 'buy' his way into people's lives. He may think the easiest or best way to make friends is through stuff. OR, He could just never have had those boundaries taught him. This really IS a family counsellor issue, for him and the parents. This boy may act out in lots of ways as he grows up. He may just need a bit of guidance. It's not over-reacting to get help.

Julieboo - ask about the curriculum. What will they teach this year? Is there a homework policy? How can you contact the teacher/pricipal/counsellor? How will they determine if he needs extra help or is advanced? What will they do in those cases? What's the discipline structure for his teacher? When will grades/report cards come out? Is there a school nurse on the campus? Will he have a locker or cubby hole that's just his? What is their policy on backpacks, notebooks, etc.

I know it looks like a lot, and might stress you out a bit, but don't worry. Teachers know parents need to know all that stuff, and if you don't ask, they'll tell you anyhow. I would ask for the contact numbers for sure, and make sure someone besides you can take your son out of school in case of emergencies (but make sure it's a really dependable person). The rest will pretty much get taken care of as you go.

I'm a teacher, and I know it's hard on parents, but we really do want YOU to enjoy this experience as much as the kids, so just remember, YOU are the boss - they work for you. Don't let them intimidate you, but don't be too hard on them either. A teacher has at least 30 bosses, all different. Good luck!

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 - 11:03 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
Thanks Mocha and Bearware! Those are exactly things I want to know!

Graceunderfyre
Member

01-22-2004

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 6:45 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Graceunderfyre a private message Print Post    
Julie, besides teacher ratio and Bear's great questions, I would ask if they do inclusive teaching - I feel like most of the schools in this area do. At the Kindergarten level it's not as disruptive because they are usually identifying kids with special needs, but I'd ask them how they identify kids with special needs. How do they service them? How does it affect the rest of the kids in the room?

If you haven't heard of it before, Inclusion means they do not have any special education rooms. Instead all the kids are kept in the same gen ed classroom and they hire a bunch of teacher's aides to supposedly work with the teacher and a facilitator who has a special ed degree and has several children in the building to keep on task. What ends up happening in my school is the facilitor pays no attention to the teacher and does whatever they want and if the teacher's aide doesn't work it out with the teacer, it can be disruptive. And a lot of times, the people they hire aren't necessarily the best qualified because they can never hire enough teacher's aides and I think Kindergarten is the easiest to stick those people in because it's the least academically challenging and it's mostly behavior management.

I'd also find out if there is a school/teacher dress code (often schools have rules about hemlines and number of straps) - I know that probably won't affect Ryan, but they may also have rules about sneakers with rollerskates tucked in or lighted shoes - you never know. Find out if there is anything on the supply list that the teacher doesn't really need or didn't make it onto the list - they make up the lists in the spring and have a generic one that isn't always what that specific teacher needs so then you end up going back out a few weeks in to get what they want. Sometime's teacher's switch classrooms/grades/schools over the summer and find they have different needs than before.

that's my 2 cents

Graceunderfyre
Member

01-22-2004

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 6:47 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Graceunderfyre a private message Print Post    
So I need a little advice - Jai just turned 3 and has almost mastered potty training. . . should I be looking at preschool for him this fall or should I wait til next year? I know I'm biased but I think he's pretty smart and he tells me he wants to go to school all the time. . . or am I being an Asian pushing their child too hard?

Merrysea
Member

08-13-2004

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 9:37 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Merrysea a private message Print Post    
Grace, my boys all went to preschool a few days a week when they were three, and they really enjoyed it. It was only about three hours a day, and it helped them learn to socialize and make friends. I found it to be a positive experience.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 10:14 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
Oh Grace, I think preschool was the best thing ever for my kids. They got to play and socialize with kids their own ages, they got to go on field trips, got used to a classroom environment and following rules, and started learning earlier.

We chose a preschool that also did daycare. Caleb started in the daycare program shortly after Kota was born (so he was 2 and a half,) and absolutely loved it. He felt like such a big boy getting to go to "school" and he also enjoyed being able to have a few hours away from the baby. At 3 he was moved into the preschool program where they started to learn through fun stuff. They had a regular story time, they sang the alphabet and counting songs. They sat at tables and did artwork and crafts. At 4 he was moved to the next class where they started to teach them to recognize letters and numbers (they'd started that in the 3 year old class, but a couple months after turning four he knew his letters and numbers, could tell you what they were, and was sloppily...which hasn't changed a bit, lol...writing them. By the time he graduated right before his 5th birthday he was reading and could do simple addition.

With Dakota we did the exact same thing, except that she started the daycare program a couple days after her second birthday. She also graduated about five months younger than Caleb had been when he graduated just because of when her birthday is (mid Sept compared to his at the end of May.) She didn't have a chance to get as far with learning to read as he did but she was more advanced in kinder than most of the children who hadn't gone to preschool.

With the way schools are now, Kindergarten isn't just fun and playing, tricycles and painting like when I was a kid. They actually sit down and learn to write and read, to do math, have science and history lessons. They work hard. Going to preschool sets them up and gets them ready for that.

I can't say enough about what a positive experience it was for both of my kidlets. Don't get me wrong though, if a parent is working with a younger child at home that is as invaluable as going to preschool. My neighbor pretty much homeschools her children starting at the age of three til they go to kindergarten and like mine, by the time they go they are reading and writing. For us, the socialization aspect was far more important because there are no children (or weren't at that time) our kids ages around. The chance for them to play and talk to kids their own ages, to learn how to behave in a classroom, that was worth every penny we paid. The fact that they came out of it reading, writing, and doing math was a bonus!

Jewels
Member

09-23-2000

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 10:51 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jewels a private message Print Post    
I signed Jenna up for preschool (she's 3) the day they opened up registration last March.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 10:54 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
LOL Jewels!

Landi
Member

07-29-2002

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 12:08 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Landi a private message Print Post    
JENNA IS THREE????? OMG! where did the time go? wasn't she just a baby?

Jewels
Member

09-23-2000

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 - 3:53 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jewels a private message Print Post    
Amazing isn't it? She'll be 4 in December. Of course, we don't get any older as they age, you know.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Thursday, August 03, 2006 - 8:33 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
They grow up fast, Jewels!

Can I complain for a minute, lol? I don't need advice I just need to vent to others who are probably going through the same thing right now.

I figured out last night talking in chat that the kids have less than two weeks til they go back to school (the 15th.) And I am so not ready for it. I'd decided earlier this summer when we bought the kids summer clothes that they would not be getting new school clothes since it'd only be two months since we bought them clothes, plus we'll have to buy all new clothes in a month or so for winter. They'll get new shoes and socks, but other than that they're set.

The one thing I haven't given no thought to is their school supplies. I thought I had another week! It's not too big of a deal because both have backpacks that are in good condition and Kota's lunch box is fine and they have folders and pencil boxes from last year. Still cool, no need to vent, lol.

This morning I pulled out their school supply lists. Now, I know from when Caleb went to third grade the supplies get a little more...older. It's no longer enough to buy a box of crayons, some glue sticks, and scizzors. I remember having to supply him with the thin dry erase markers (they do a lot of work in third grade on dry erase boards,) a calculater, one of those thingies you put a pencil in one side and has a pointy end on the other. I remember having to buy a whole bunch of stuff we'd never had to buy before for him that year.

So I pull out the supply lists and Caleb's is fairly normal, couple packs of paper, pencils, colored pencils, pens, etc. Dakota's on the other hand I did a double take. There is not one thing listed on her list that is for personal use. It's reams of copy paper, dry erase markers and eraser, boxes of kleenex, etc etc etc and then a note at the bottom informing us all this stuff will be collected to be used for the class.

First, I have no problem with taking in school supplies for the class. At Back to School night (usually the first or second week of school) we're given a list thats almost exactly the same as the third grade list this year. And anytime I'm out shopping and find myself buying paper, dry erase markers, kleenex, index cards, etc, I pick up extra and drop off at the school. If we get a note home saying the class is in desperate need of whatever, we pick it up. I have no problem doing it either. The school doesn't supply kleenex, only gives each class 200 sheets of copy paper a month, and a handful of dry erase markers that are supposed to last the year. I understand the teachers can't supply the class all year by themselves. But we have never been asked to send all this in on the first day of school and never with such a long list!

Second, it ticks me off that because they're asking for all this class stuff, there's not a list of personal items my kids gonna need! I remember some of the stuff from Caleb being in third grade, but not all of it.

Mostly it ticks me off because the begining of the school year is a tough time for a lot of families. With new school supplies, hair cuts, shoes, clothes, etc, it's expensive! Even for us not buying new clothes and recycling some of last years school stuff like backpacks, we'll still end up spending quite a bit getting them ready. Why can't they just tell me what I need to get my own kid ready first? And then give me a list of stuff the class will need that I can drop off throughout the year rather than asking me to supply all of it on the first freaking day of school???? Sigh.

Jewels
Member

09-23-2000

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 4:26 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jewels a private message Print Post    
It's horrible isn't it, War? It's not like they don't have some stuff left over from last year either so they don't have to have everything the first day. This year our school is just going to have us give money for the "kits" or whatever from Office Depot or something. I wonder what else they will ask for beyond that.

I need to vent too. You'll never guess about who...Jenna. This girl is just going to get my goat. One day last week I was looking for marbles under the couch for the kids and I found her half eaten sandwich and some carrots under the couch. That had been her lunch that day. So I looked under the other couch and found a crusty part of a sandwich, probably the days before lunch. I was shocked that she had been hiding her food. We talked about it and she was punished, I hoped she learned her lesson. Yeah, right.

Yesterday, we were eating lunch and she and Jake were sitting at the dining room table, Jim and I were in the den eating and watching golf. All of the sudden she came in and said she was done. I thought it strange because from where I was sitting I could see the kitchen and I never saw her put anything in the garbage or throw anything in the sink. I questioned her about it and she said she had used the stool to put her plate in the sink quietly. Blatant lie. She didn't even have a plate, she had a paper towel. Plus, I could see the sink from the den and she had never been there. She had had a juice box, sandwich and grapes, I know she had eaten the grapes because I was there when she did it.

I went to the garbage to look for the juice box, it wasn't there and it wasn't on the dining room table or anywhere in the area. We kept questioning her and she finally said she would get it. Jim followed her and she showed him where it was. She had hid the juice box and sandwich under our dresser in our bedroom! And blatanly lied about it! OMG! She was sent to her bed and she didn't get anything else to eat until dinner. Jim and I both gave her a lecture and I was sure she had learned something. Yeah, right.

This morning at breakfast we talked about hiding food and lying. I kept close tabs on her and she ate everything and was excited to tell me about it. At lunch, she had a sandwich, carrots and gold fish. Before I gave it to her I asked her if she was sure she was going to eat it and she said yes. It's not like I foreced it on her, the kids pick what they want to eat for lunch, as long as it is healthy. I was there for a while and then left to make a short phone call, the last I saw she still had most of her sandwich left. In just a short amount of time she came to tell me that she had finished everything. I went to the dining room and there was no food on the table. I knew it had been too quick for her to eat the sandwich, so I questioned her. She kept telling me she ate it, but I didn't believe her. Finally, she showed me where she had hid the sandwich. OMG, again. I sent her to her bed, where she promptly fell asleep. What kind of punishment is that?

I know why she is hiding it. When the kids finish their lunch they get a small treat. She just wants the treat. She knows that Jake always finishes his lunch so he gets his treat.

Obviously, she's not getting the treat anymore. She isn't even going to get dessert after dinner for a while. But what about the lying? Goodness, she is only 3. Jake doesn't lie, he just doesn't think that way. I haven't had to deal with this before.

I think I should treat the two problems seperately. A punishment for hiding the food, which would be no treat or dessert (serious to her because that is her goal, but really the treats and dessert are very small, it's not like she gets a huge slice of cake everyday) and also nothing else to eat until dinner. Then a punishment for lying, which is being sent to her bed, but if she is going to just fall asleep, what good is that. Maybe I need to take some toys or something away. But I should treat the two issues seperately, right?

Ugh. I just can't believe she did it again today after what she went through yesterday. And I can hear her whining in the living room now, "Mom, I'm hunnnnngggggrrrrryyyyy."

Any other ideas? Can anyone commiserate with me? I'm going to lose it!

Vee
Member

02-23-2004

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 5:36 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Vee a private message Print Post    
Awwww, Jewels, it isn't any fun, is it? I had one who hid food, too. But then, I was one who hid my food so I guess it was karma. LOL!

Hope you get some good suggestions. My suggestions would be to allow Jenna as much control over her food as you can. Allow her to serve herself and to take only as much as she thinks that she wants. Try sitting down and visiting with her while she eats. And, if it's possible, remove the whole concept of dessert being the reward for a finished meal.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 7:45 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
My two cents is don't make a huge deal over food. That can lead to a lifetime of all sorts of issues. I guess I would eliminate the treat. And don't "force" them to eat everything. Maybe make desserts/treats spontaneous/unpredictable and NOT dependent on whether they eat or not....

Jewels
Member

09-23-2000

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 8:16 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jewels a private message Print Post    
Believe me, I know all about food issues.

I don't think I make a big deal out of food. I personally don't care if they finish their food. That's their choice. But they are not going to get dessert or anything else unless they at least attempt to eat. But the thing is Jake always finishes. That's just how he is.

The after lunch "treat" kind of evolved after Halloween last year. Jake would come home from school wanting candy and I would tell him that he couldn't have any until sometime after lunch. That turned into having it after he ate. I don't think that is that big of a deal...for him. It's not a reward, it's an afternoon snack he happens to have after lunch, he just happens to always eat lunch. Jenna, on the other hand, can snack all day long if I let her, she hates to sit down for a meal. So she doesn't want to sit there and eat, but she wants to be like her big brother.

I don't have a problem with Jake, it's just Jenna. I don't want to "punish" Jake for something that Jenna is doing. Sometimes it is so difficult having two kids that are sooooo incredibly different. Ugh.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 9:54 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
Hehe, Jewels, you're giving me flashbacks to when Kota was that age, lol. There was no telling where I'd find half eaten food. I remember finding a handfull of something gloppy in her jacket pocket. Stubborn, hard headed little girl (lol, mine, not neccessarily yours!.)

I never did accomplish getting her to eat a full meal in one sitting. Dakota's schedule was wonky for kindergarten--had to be ready to leave by 10:30 and because they were half day didn't get lunch at school, even with preschool it was off somewhat because she was always getting home an hour or so after lunch time (I know Jenna's not this old yet but it might work with her as well) so she ate all morning/afternoon long. She'd have an egg or cereal for breakfast. Then a little later a piece of fruit. Then some raw veggies, a while later a sandwich, then usually as we were heading to school an apple or crackers. Snack at school, and then a snack at home. Dinner was about the only time she ate a full meal. The biggest thing was making sure everything she was eating was healthy. Something like that might work with Jenna better than trying to get her to eat a full lunch at once.

Dakota still eats like that now. Rather than a full breakfast and lunch, she eats smaller meals and more snacks (fruits, veggies, crackers.)

Or, with her rushing through (or hiding it!) to get the treat at the end, instead of taking treats completely away, do it as a reward. If she finishes her lunch every day for five days, she can have a scoop of ice cream or piece of cake on Friday afternoon after she eats lunch.

The lying, I think, is a tough one. She's still kinda young and learning the difference between right and wrong. At that age, you usually can't tell them something just once and have it stick. While you're telling her that lying is wrong it may take a couple times to sink in. LOL, ok, I just spent the last four days with my 2 and a half year old niece and I think she's still so sweet and innocent that things like lying and understanding why hitting is a no no is still a forgeign thing to her. Cuz ya know, someone that sweet and little couldn't be misbehaving on purpose! I'd take a deep breath and look at it as...we didn't potty train in one day or teach them the alphabet in an afternoon, we have to repeat and repeat and repeat for them to get it.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Monday, August 07, 2006 - 10:07 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
I've got a question I'll get to in a minute.

The school supplies are ridiculous. It's such a tough time of year for a lot of families trying to get their own kids ready, at least give us a couple weeks to recover before giving us a supply list for the classroom. LOL, I did pick up a few boxes of kleenex since I know Kota's usually the one going through the most in class with her allergies! I figure I'll find out later on what exactly the teacher needs and then do like other years, buying a little each time I go shopping.

Ok, for my question. Dakota's got swimmers ear. How can I prevent that from happening again? She's got to stay out of the water for a few days but after that I'm worried about it happening again.