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Archive through May 08, 2006

The TVClubHouse: General Discussion ARCHIVES: 2006 Mar. ~ 2006 May: Free Expressions: Manners/etiquteet/what would ya do/etc (ARCHIVES): Archive through May 08, 2006 users admin

Author Message
Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 11:55 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
We usually have a pretty big birthday party for my son's b-day. We would like to invite a lot of neighbors, but don't want to seem like we are asking for a bunch of presents for him. Is there some kind of wording we can use on the invites so people would not feel obligated to bring a gift? I also wouldn't want people to feel bad that they don't bring one if they see him get other gifts. Uggh! Oh, we'll be having the party on Memorial Day weekend. So maybe Memorial Day could be highlighted. If so, how do we word that?

Native_texan
Member

08-24-2004

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 12:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Native_texan a private message Print Post    
Julie, I have received invitations that simply had "Gifts are not requested" written at the bottom.

Please excuse the secretary in me, but could someone correct the spelling of "etiquette."

<fixed 77>

Wapland
Member

08-01-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 12:10 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wapland a private message Print Post    
How about asking people to make a donation in honour of your son's birthday to a local children's hospital. You could say,

"Bobby would like to know that other children have something to celebrate. So as your gift to him, could you please honour him by gifting the Children's Hospital of Chicago/or any other children's charity of your choice."

I would provide the specific information on how to do it. That would help motivate people.

Fondly
Wappy

Texannie
Member

07-16-2001

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:05 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Texannie a private message Print Post    
Could you do seperate invitations for those people and gear it more towards a Memorial Day party?
I have also seen, "No Gifts Please, your prescence it present enough!"

Seamonkey
Moderator

09-07-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:06 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Seamonkey a private message Print Post    
You could just have a Memorial Day party and then at some point announce that you want to share your son's birthday cake with everyone and request that they join you in singing Happy Birthday..

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:15 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
I am totally thinking of two separate invites. The thing is some of the neighbors know we do this every year. I just would like to branch out and invite more neighbors, but not make them feel like they have to bring a gift. (Or the reason they are invited is for a gift.) Do you think people would think that?

Sea, I thought of that, but then I just think some people might feel awkward if they see the other gifts (from relatives). Plus we are going to get one of those jumper things (moonwalk, bounce house) so it will be apparent that it is a kid party.

Is a simple "no gift necessary" good enough? (Or could that actually be taken as a hint to bring a gift??)

Texannie
Member

07-16-2001

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:29 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Texannie a private message Print Post    
I would do the two invitations and not worry about it. If they should say anything just say something like "we just wanted to have you here" and leave it like that.

Wargod
Moderator

07-16-2001

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:38 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Wargod a private message Print Post    
Have the family come over early for a private family party and they can give gifts then. Say invite them over at 11 and then the neighbors at 12 or something. Invitations can say something like, "Memorial Day Party, we will also be having cake later to celebrate his birthday."

Jimmer
Moderator

08-30-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 1:49 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jimmer a private message Print Post    
My experience with the "No gift" thing, is that some people inevitably bring gifts anyway. Then the ones who took you at your word and listened to you, feel bad.

People generally expect to bring gifts or something. So I wouldn't do the no gift note. Just let everyone do what they want.

Zachsmom
Member

07-13-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 2:13 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Zachsmom a private message Print Post    
I don't think people would think the reason why you invited them to a party is for the gifts. I have never felt the reason why I was invited to a celebration (b-day, wedding shower, baby shower etc) was for a gift. I am usually honored that they thought to invite me.

I wouldn't worry about it. Just send out the invites, those who want to come will. Hope he has a very special b-day.

Jewels
Member

09-23-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 2:18 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jewels a private message Print Post    
Did you have this same question last year, Julie? What did you end up doing then?

Jasper
Member

09-14-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 2:35 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jasper a private message Print Post    
Julieboo - just wanted to say we miss you in the AI game

Twiggyish
Member

08-14-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 3:34 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Twiggyish a private message Print Post    
I love the idea of a donation in lieu of flowers. My daughter's b-day is coming up and she mentioned just wanting to invite friends without them having to bring anything. We do have a fun day planned.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 4:17 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
I think you are right Jimmer! Thanks to everyone here for all your opinions and input, I do appreciate it all!!! :-) I think I may do two invites. One for family will stress the birthday part more and the one for the neighbors will mention the b-day, but will also stress the Memorial day/neighborhood get together too!

Thanks Again!

Twiggyish
Member

08-14-2000

Thursday, May 04, 2006 - 4:21 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Twiggyish a private message Print Post    
LOL.. My post should say instead of presents.

Biloxibelle
Member

12-21-2001

Saturday, May 06, 2006 - 6:41 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Biloxibelle a private message Print Post    
Julie, not sure if you would want to try this. I have noticed more and more people are doing this here.

On you invitation you could put you will also be celebrating the birthday boy. However he requests no presents for himself. Instead of presents he is asking for cat/dog food. The Birthday Boy will then deliver the food to your local pet shelter in honor of his birthday.

A couple of years ago a mom here did that. The local paper met her and the kids at the shelter. So many parents thought that was such a great idea that they now do the same thing.

PS, the kids love doing it.

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Saturday, May 06, 2006 - 6:51 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Herckleperckle a private message Print Post    
What a lovely idea, BB!

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Saturday, May 06, 2006 - 7:15 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
Love it love it love it!!! Great idea that we are sure to use!!! Thank you so much!

Seamonkey
Moderator

09-07-2000

Saturday, May 06, 2006 - 9:05 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Seamonkey a private message Print Post    
There are so many items a pet rescue can use. I was visiting the cats yesterday at the rescue where I got Angelina and looking at their wish list. A simple trip next door to Albertson's and I brought back 24 rolls of good paper towels and 80 super heavy duty garbage bags. Food, old sheets/towels, pet beds, carriers, litter. (the biggest wish on their list was a van and if I ever win a lotto, that is something they will get).

Julie, I can just see your little guy, enjoying the giving to the shelter cats/dogs since I'm sure he's well aware of the wonders of pet adoption.

Biloxibelle
Member

12-21-2001

Sunday, May 07, 2006 - 7:02 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Biloxibelle a private message Print Post    
You are welcome Julie. I'm glad you like the idea. Please let us know how it turns out. Let's hope other parents that come to your party like the idea so that might also do it. I haven't heard of one child yet that wasn't happy to give up "gifts" in order to do this. They are all so proud of what they have done.

Sea, the other items are something I have never thought of for our shelter. They have been over run since the hurricane. I'm going to add some of these items to my shopping list. I will pick up a couple of them every week while I shop. I can drop them off on my way home since our shelter is on the way. Thanks for the idea.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Sunday, May 07, 2006 - 9:26 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
I just totally love that idea. But now how should i word it. I want to make it "casual" (cuz I don't even like the idea of bringing up a gift in any capacity. Especially with the version I am sending to the neighbors.) so I just would like to add one small line at the bottom of the invite.

Can you guys help me word it?

BTW, here is the wording for the neighbors so far:

MEMORiAL DAY/BIRTHDAY PARTY

Please join us for an afternoon of relaxing,
eating and mingling.

We will have some fun kid things,
including a bounce house!
(as it is also Ryan’s birthday!!)

WHERE: Our House

WHEN: Monday, May 29th at 1PM

RSVP: And please do, so we know how much food &
drinks to get! Please!

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 07, 2006 - 5:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Herckleperckle a private message Print Post    
I suggest you call the Pet Rescue in your area and ASK about what things are on their wish list. Then modify your message at the bottom accordingly.


MEMORIAL DAY CELEBRATION/BIRTHDAY PARTY

Please join us for an afternoon of relaxing, eating and mingling.

We will have some fun kid things, including a bounce house!
(as it is also Ryan’s birthday *!!)

WHERE: Our House (2204 Northstar Rd. Phone: 333-3333)

WHEN: Monday, May 29th at from 1PM - 5 PM

RSVP: And Please do RSVP! We want to ensure we know how much food & drinks to get! Please! there's enough food and drink for all!

* The following optional message is meant ONLY for those who had planned to buy Ryan a birthday gift: We want to honor Ryan's wish to help our local (NAME HERE-Pet Rescue). You can help us do that by bringing a staple for the animals in the shelter instead of something for Ryan. He is sooo excited about this idea and truly does not want anything for himself. Attached, you'll find <Animal Shelter Name's> wish list! We promise to take pictures of our delivery to the Shelter following the party.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Sunday, May 07, 2006 - 6:54 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
Thanks HP!!! It's so handy to have a professional proofreader here! :-)

Prisonerno6
Member

08-31-2002

Monday, May 08, 2006 - 5:19 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Prisonerno6 a private message Print Post    
The anal-retentive in me thinks "Please do RSVP" seems redundant since RSVP actually means "Please respond" (Respondez s'il vous plait). Perhaps you could change that to, "Please let us know if you can attend by (such and such a date)!

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Monday, May 08, 2006 - 5:27 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
The reason I over emphasize the RSVP is that so few people do. Maybe it's just our friends and family, but we have done this party 6 times and we have had several other Halloween or Christmas parties over the years. And I tell ya, I have to hunt people down to see if they are coming or not.

I just hate having too much food. But I would flip out if we didn't have enough. I don't mind the extra drinks, as they will "hold" for a long time. But we have ended up with so much extra before and had to throw a lot out since it was so perishable.

Why don't people RSVP? (Do most people know what it means?)

Also, is there any other wording that is short & sweet and yet motivating?