TVCH FORUMS HOME . JOIN . FAN CLUBS . ABOUT US . CONTACT . CHAT  
Bomis   Quick Links   TOPICS . TREE-VIEW . SEARCH . HELP! . NEWS . PROFILE
Archive through May 10, 2006

The TVClubHouse: General Discussion ARCHIVES: 2006 Mar. ~ 2006 May: Baby Boomers, Living Alone, Changing Habits (ARCHIVES): Archive through May 10, 2006 users admin

Author Message
Zachsmom
Member

07-13-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:44 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Zachsmom a private message Print Post    
I agree Mocha..totally agree...

He's going to France in a couple of weeks...maybe I should wait until then?

Cndeariso
Member

06-28-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:44 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Cndeariso a private message Print Post    
and deeds the property over to her! grin

Crzndeb
Member

07-26-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:48 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Crzndeb a private message Print Post    
Native, you don't need a date to remember big o....I better get out of here before this starts going further downhill

Cndeariso
Member

06-28-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:49 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Cndeariso a private message Print Post    
whoohoo! like your thinking crzndeb. BOB can be your best friend sometimes. bob

Brenda1966
Member

07-03-2002

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:50 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Brenda1966 a private message Print Post    
Native, that's exactly why guys who move too fast are frightening. They can carry that act for a short while, but when you make them slow down and keep it up for a long while, the cracks begin to show.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:57 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
Oh yeah France too lol.

Native_texan
Member

08-24-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 12:59 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Native_texan a private message Print Post    
Ya'll are just so bad!!!!

Jimmer
Moderator

08-30-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 1:08 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jimmer a private message Print Post    
Just in case it isn't obvious to everyone here, women who move fast can be scary for guys as well.

Chewpito
Member

01-04-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 1:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Chewpito a private message Print Post    
Sooooo Bad...Its Good.. LOL

Chewpito
Member

01-04-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 1:26 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Chewpito a private message Print Post    
The thing I was thinking with Zacksmom is your just looking for a fling it sounds like. Someone for good times,dinners,sex...thats all fine...BUT.. The way I read it is it sounds like the guy really likes you...so he has feelings too, your fun times and signals may be driving him nuts cause he wants more. Maybe hes not the right guy to have a fling with cause he likes you too much. You want to make an apt to be with this guy on your terms and not let him into your life at all.. I mean it is your life, your child-your mom (I dont know the peticulars) but if hes as great as you seem to make him sound and he likes you alot but you only want a piece of him and nothing more...maybe an escort service would be better. I think you may break this guys heart. But I could be way of base.. I am a gal- but- I think guys have feelings too. Oh, Im not against having a good time by the way, but if the "good time guy" is a regular!..hes bound to get attached--then what??

Ladytex
Member

09-27-2001

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 1:56 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Ladytex a private message Print Post    
Zmom, call me if you need a chaperone for Maui, k? :-)

Seamonkey
Moderator

09-07-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 1:59 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Seamonkey a private message Print Post    
I'll go back to one of my first guesses.. he really does want more, a future, a family, but he agreed to what you offered, thinking he'd change your mind later.

This isn't all bad because it should mean he really likes you, cares for you, sees a future, but if he keeps pushing you, I can see your resistance building up.

and then there is always that little niggling voice ..WHY is he so interested in a little boy? (That is the abused kid in me raising her hand).

I guess it boils down to standing firm in what you want and making it very clear to him unless you change your mind.

Zachsmom
Member

07-13-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 2:32 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Zachsmom a private message Print Post    
why is it so wrong for a women to have a casual reationship?

that is all I want right now.

Denecee
Member

09-05-2002

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 2:38 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Denecee a private message Print Post    
It's not wrong. Have fun!

Seamonkey
Moderator

09-07-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 2:44 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Seamonkey a private message Print Post    
NOTHING is wrong with it! You just have to find the right guy who wants the same thing. And this may be the guy.

Native_texan
Member

08-24-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 3:01 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Native_texan a private message Print Post    
Zmom, it seems you set the parameters at the beginning and he's the one who might be trying to change them.

And, remember, you haven't heard his explanation yet. It could be much ado about nothing. He might be thinking ahead and is simply worried about whether your child will like him if and when the time comes to meet him. That's doesn't mean he's trying to rush you into anything.

Cndeariso
Member

06-28-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 3:39 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Cndeariso a private message Print Post    
there is nothing wrong with what you are wanting to have, zachsmom.

and, if everyone were to think about it for a moment, how many men introduce the women they are dating to their children right up front? hardly any.

so, why should you?

Chewpito
Member

01-04-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 3:57 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Chewpito a private message Print Post    
well, I knew most of the kids befor the Dads..as all the kids used to hang out at my house, The Dads came later, and good friendships started and somtimes more...many times more.. Im not against a woman having a fling at all..I think you should be able to do any thing you want. Im just saying if you have a fling its a fling. When you see them more often, more regular its allmost imposible to not get more attached because one is allways going to like the other more..or maybe you both might just take it on full force, But if only one wants a fling and the other wants more- that person is most likley going to get hurt and then thats when a fling is a head ache. You need to find someone thats just hungry at dinner time and likes sex..but not you so much.

Chewpito
Member

01-04-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 4:01 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Chewpito a private message Print Post    
By the way, its my experiance that single fathers-flock to single mothers... and there is a lot of single fathers... I know them.

Juju2bigdog
Member

10-27-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 7:27 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Juju2bigdog a private message Print Post    
Listen to that little nagging voice, Zmom. It is usually the voice of reason.

Jimmer
Moderator

08-30-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 7:58 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Jimmer a private message Print Post    
There is certainly nothing wrong with a woman wanting a casual relationship.

Also it is easy to find guys who are more than happy with a casual relationship. They are all over the place!

The difficulty I suspect is finding a nice guy that you truly like who also wants a casual relationship.

Seamonkey
Moderator

09-07-2000

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 8:00 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Seamonkey a private message Print Post    
Aye, that's the rub!

Newman
Member

09-25-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 8:49 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Newman a private message Print Post    
I agree with what Jimmer just said.

Sped read some of the posts. Wanted to comment on something Brenda said and on one of Chewpito's.

Brenda I was being overly dramatic when I said I would put my tony townhouse up for sale if I ever was in a similar situation that ZMom depicted.

I think if that sort of thing happened to me now, as a Baby Boomer, I would be cautious. I would be pinching myself, thinking, "this can't be happening to me at this late stage of the game."

I've always had this desire to want to move in with someone I loved. Of course, I'm thinking of my 20s and 30s.

Still, there was something Chewpito said in one of her posts. Men have feelings too. ZMom's new bf might not have the same goals/limits that ZMom desires, even though she was very upfront with her restrictions.

What if he wants more? Myself, I don't know if I would be capable of a "casual" relationship (whatever that means). I tend to get involved. When you're at dinner how do you avoid talking about your son, for example? I would find it hard not asking about him or the other people that are important in her life.

Ask, but don't get involved? Easier said than done.

What is a "casual" relationship anyway? I've never been in one...


Merrysea
Member

08-13-2004

Tuesday, May 09, 2006 - 9:00 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Merrysea a private message Print Post    
The last man I knew who tried to get me to agree to a casual relationship didn't want his wife to find out about it!

Cndeariso
Member

06-28-2004

Wednesday, May 10, 2006 - 5:06 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Cndeariso a private message Print Post    
about 8 months after i divorced in 1990 i met someone who told me up front that he didn't want a longterm relationship, for me not to fall in love with him, that he just wanted someone to out with and have fun. that was absolutely no problem for me after just leaving a nasty marriage.

within 3 or 4 months it was him that fell 'in love' with me and started demanding i be faithful to him, etc. i did my best to rid myself of him at that point. he became almost stalker-like and i had to get someone in law enforcement to talk to him about leaving me alone.