Author |
Message |
Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 9:05 am
Does anyone here think vow renewal ceremonies are lame?
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Weinermr
Member
08-18-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 12:40 pm
I do.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 12:54 pm
I think it really depends on the situation. I think a renewal of vows for anything less than 20 years unless there is some extraordinary reason is lame, but I have seen it done at a 20th and at a 50th anniversary party and it was quite beautiful.
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Landi
Member
07-29-2002
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 2:09 pm
personally, i have thought that one time was enough. a vow is a vow is a vow. no reason to renew it. unless i get alzheimers and can't remember making it, i'm not doing it again. and if he (the husband) gets alzheimers and can't remember making it... all the better for me! PARTAY! (that was a joke people!)
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 2:26 pm
I didn't get to have the "wedding" I dreamed of. I would love to redo it. We had to rush it because they were sending him to Afghanistan. Thankfully, he never was deployed, but sadly, I got jipped on my "dream" wedding. We don't even have good pictures. I realize it isn't about the "wedding" it's about the marriage, but still.....
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 2:33 pm
I am sorry you didn't get to have your dream wedding, but why not throw a wonderful anniversary party, buy a beautiful dress, invite all the people near and dear to you and take pictures.
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Bandit
Member
07-29-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 2:56 pm
Just out of curiousity, Weinermr, how come you think they are lame? I really don't have an opinion one way or the other on the subject, but I was just curious as to your reason.
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Mameblanche
Member
04-13-2005
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:07 pm
I'm all for romance in any and all fashions... plus any excuse for a party is okay by me. ANd ya gotta know that a friendly reminder of those utmost important vows can't hurt, eh? Unless someone's on crutches, I don't think its a lame idea at all. hee hee.
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Mocha
Member
08-12-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:12 pm
I think it's lame too but that's just me. If it's what you want then go for it and don't let our opinions influence you.
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Wargod
Moderator
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:23 pm
I don't think it's lame, I think it's kinda sweet. Mostly though I think through the years things change. Our priorities become different, our focus is different, kids enter the picture, problems pop up at work, bills pile up, the house falls down, etc, etc, etc. It gets easier and easier to put the needs of being a married couple on the back burner. Maybe renewing wedding vows, but adding things in to reflect the changes that have happened since the first time you did it is a good thing. Not inoring those original vows, just adding some that have some bearing to your current life. Like, "I promise to greet you when you get home from work with, hi, how was your day? I missed you, I love you, let's spend five minutes talking about us" instead of, "hey Johnny flunked a test, the kitchen sink is backed up, the mechanic called and said it'd cost $600 bucks to repair the car." Or promising to be more spontanious, or having date night once a week where there's no talking about kids, bills, work and throwing in a weekend away for couple time. It this day where half of marriages end in divorce, where some never make it past the first year, I think it's nice theres still couples willing to stand up and say after x amount of years, I want to marry my spouse all over again.
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Escapee
Member
06-15-2004
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:24 pm
Well, now my dress is too big and his uniform is too small...........I would love to have some professional pictures and I did miss out on my wedding cake. Maybe we can have an anniversary party and I could get my cake, and get some pictures. Sisters still have their dresses.
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Landi
Member
07-29-2002
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:25 pm
war, if i ever have a renewal ceremony, i want to add that line. quote:"I promise to greet you when you get home from work with, hi, how was your day? I missed you, I love you, let's spend five minutes talking about us" instead of, "hey Johnny flunked a test, the kitchen sink is backed up, the mechanic called and said it'd cost $600 bucks to repair the car."
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Wargod
Moderator
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 3:54 pm
LOL, I think that'd be a great one to add. When we were first married, that was how our evenings started. We'd cuddle on the couch and chat about how things were going, how much we missed each other, what plans we had for going out. Now it's more walk in the door and get hit with, You would not believe what YOUR child did today! Oh, and when you get a few minutes the dryer isn't working, lol. Or remember those early days where you'd hop in the shower together for some fun, now you do it to save time so you can get out of the house a few minutes quicker. Or spending all day in bed Saturdays and it wasn't cuz you were sick! Life is so different when you're just starting out as a married couple than when you've been together for years and have gone through ups and downs and kids and whatnot, that I don't think having new vows to reflect those changes is a bad thing. No one stays the same after years, life and experiences change you, you grow up, whats important when you're young isn't quite so important as you get older. Sometimes you make these promises in private, other times you want to climb the highest mountain and scream them for the world to hear. Personally I think if I had the choice, I'd redo the honeymoon instead of the vows. I had food poisoning and it was a miserable week. We ended up coming home days early so I could go to the doctor, I'd definitely redo that, LOL!
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Pamy
Member
01-02-2002
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 6:37 pm
LOL Weiner!
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Babyruth
Member
07-19-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 7:16 pm
Weiner, your word play wasn't lost on me 
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Pamy
Member
01-02-2002
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 7:29 pm
Escapee, I think if you want to renew them then it's not lame....I think it would be fun...make it a big ole party........we got married in Vegas and then 'renewed' our vows in costume at our reception party three mo later...it was Vegas theme..Liberace married us!! People still talk about that party, said it was the best ever......I would like to do it again one day
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Meggieprice
Member
07-09-2001
| Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 8:14 pm
Escapee I think vow renewal is lovely! Truth is, Michael and I have renewed our vows twice already. For example, the hotel in Hawaii where all thre of us were for Valentines Day two years ago had a group vow renewal under the banyan tree by the beach. In fact, we feel we renew our vows at every wedding we photograph, there is always a moment during the ceremony when we look at each other and connect. I love it that couples want to renew their marriage vows. Daily would not be too much! ANd by all means if you never got the wedding you wanted, go for it! Celebrate your love every day, in every way you want to. Of course as a photographer I think photos are important too!
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Bandit
Member
07-29-2001
| Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:37 am
Well, Weiner's word play went right over my head! Funny though!
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Holly
Member
06-19-2005
| Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 9:38 am
Meggieprice I just have to say that I don't think I've ever known anyone who sounds happier in their marriage than you. Everytime you write about it and Michael, I get a big smile on my face. You are very fortunate to have found each other. We all should be so lucky 
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Meggieprice
Member
07-09-2001
| Friday, December 30, 2005 - 5:34 pm
Awww- thanks Holly. I wont deny it! We waited a long time to find each other and were both hurt a lot in life. We are crazy in love and old enough to know our level of communication and connection is rare. And Zachy has to see us be mush all the time, lol! Our connection as a family is really strong too.
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Seamonkey
Moderator
09-07-2000
| Friday, December 30, 2005 - 8:58 pm
They are adorable together!
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Karen
Member
09-07-2004
| Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 12:15 pm
My man will soon be in the market for a shiny, sparkly diamond for me. Hooray! His mother has been holding onto her grandparents' wedding bands -- not the engagement ring, just the bands... Didn't give them to my BFs older bro when he got married 'cause she didn't like her new daughter-in-law. But she's excited that it's about time for us and would like to give them to us. I love the idea of wearing family jewellery (and the fact that she didn't like DIL #1 enough, but I'm OK is flattering enough in itself!!). The problem is that they are yellow gold, and the engagement ring I have always seen myself wearing since I was a little girl is white gold. I just don't like the look of the yellow as much. What's a girl to do? Do I suck it up to make her happy, and get my BF to buy my ring in yellow? Politely say 'thanks but no thanks'? to my MIL? Is it possible to have the yellow bands dipped / plated in white? Does anyone have any advice / expertise? I'm sure someone here has been through something similar before.... I really have my heart set on the white gold set... but I don't want to disappoint anyone, either... (Thank Goodness we plan to elope and this will be the biggest "family intrusion" in our wedding plans!!)
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 2:06 pm
You can have the bands dipped in white gold, but I might find out how your new mil would feel about that.
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Julieboo
Member
02-05-2002
| Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 2:08 pm
Hmmm, what about an engagement ring that is mostly white gold with a bit of yellow gold somehow incorporated in the design???
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Karen
Member
09-07-2004
| Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 2:18 pm
Thanks, Tex -- I wasn't sure if that could be done or not. Julie -- I've thought about that, kind of a half-and-half deal... I'm not sure how I feel about the aesthetics of that, though, I'm sure the right jeweller could make it work. I think I'll just have to suck it up and come to an "all or nothing" decision. Maybe I'll discuss with my man and see which side he'd rather take... I don't think MIL would be upset either way, I do like the sentiment of wearing her ring... maybe yellow gold isn't as bad as I make it out to be, LOL.
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