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Archive through December 29, 2005

The TVClubHouse: General Discussions ARCHIVES: 2005 Dec. ~ 2006 Feb.: Free Expression: Online Dating: Archive through December 29, 2005 users admin

Author Message
Newman
Member

09-25-2004

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 5:52 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Newman a private message Print Post    
What is the best site? I thought I saw a thread for eharmony.com somewhere here at tvch but I can't find it. I've never tried them.

I've never had good luck with online dating. Which seems strange to me because I love to write and a lot of men don't.

Is match.com the best place to go? I'm thinking the best way to meet a person, is not thru online dating, but rather thru VOLUNTEERING <chuckling>.

Thoughts and comments??


Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:17 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
I use Blackplanet.com. I tried Eharmony and didn't find any matches.

Bandit
Member

07-29-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:22 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Bandit a private message Print Post    
A co-worker of mine swears by match.com. She must go on 4-5 dates a week...all with different people. (Yes, we are quite proud of her )

On Yahoo personals, you can search for free, however. My friend and I sometimes look on there for people we went to high school with. And ex-boyfriends...that's REALLY fun!

Costacat
Member

07-15-2000

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:26 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Costacat a private message Print Post    
I know there are success stories out there, but 99% of the men I met via an online service lied about various things. Age. Height. Activity level. Really old photographs. I avoid every online service like the plague now. (Anyways, I don't wanna get married or committed, so what's the point?)

You can meet a lot of people on any of the sites. Females seem to have better luck with "dating" than men. Men must be more pro-active, leaving notes for those women they wanna meet, whereas women just rake in all the notes of those wanting to meet them.

Another option is singles mixers and lunch dating services (such as It's Just Lunch). The latter tends to be a higher class option (and priced accordingly). But to be honest, I do think you get what you pay for.

And the thing about finding matches... you can find matches almost anywhere. It's the "after the first" meeting/phone call/whatever that's open for debate as to the success of the "service"! :-)

Max
Moderator

08-12-2000

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:31 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Max a private message Print Post    
I know folks who have had success on match.com, but most of them are in their 30s.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 7:44 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
I've never had a problem with the men lying bout their looks or posting old pics cause these days everyone has camera phones. But I do find that on the site that I go to there's alot of young people and teens there.

Cndeariso
Member

06-28-2004

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:12 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Cndeariso a private message Print Post    
i don't have a camera phone

when i was dating i found a lot of men distorted their qualities and had extremely narrow expectations. and, a lot of them were still married. but, i didn't find one site that worked better than another. in fact, i used several to get a better variety.

Legalboxer
Member

11-17-2003

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:14 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Legalboxer a private message Print Post    
is being in their 30s a bad thing? :-)

Goddessatlaw
Member

07-19-2002

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:23 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Goddessatlaw a private message Print Post    
My husband's sister did match.com and she's fittin' to marry a guy she met through them (they've been dating for several years now, the guy is great). I have another friend who met his new spouse through speed-dating. Go figure. You just never know what's going to work.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:25 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
i don't either, yet

Vacanick
Member

07-12-2004

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:29 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Vacanick a private message Print Post    
I am currently dating a man I met through eHarmony. We've been dating for the past 9 months and are very happy!

Karuuna
Board Administrator

08-31-2000

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:30 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Karuuna a private message Print Post    
A couple of alternative services are democraticmatch.com and soulmatch.com. :-)

Vacanick
Member

07-12-2004

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 8:40 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Vacanick a private message Print Post    
I'm just turning 40 and the man I met on eH and am currently dating just turned 50. So I don't think it's an age thing. I think it's more about timing!

Karuuna, love the alternative sites! I'll need to pass those on to some single friends!

Mameblanche
Member

04-13-2005

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 9:09 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mameblanche a private message Print Post    
Hi, I have a pretty neighbour in her 30's who has met several long-term boyfriends through lavalife online. (Consecutive not simultaneous, lol) It may be only a Canadian service - I don't know. (shrug)

Max
Moderator

08-12-2000

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 9:40 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Max a private message Print Post    
As far as age goes, I'm just saying that some services have a demographic that's younger than others. Most of the big success stories I've heard from match.com were skewed towards the 30-something crowd. For someone in their 50s, the demographic at that site might not be the best "target-rich environment" online -- unless you're hoping to hook up with someone a lot younger or something. :-)

I think the demographics on eHarmony might be a bit broader.

However, this is all based on anecdotal evidence; I'm not sure if any of them publish demographic information or, better yet, if there's any third-party, independent entity that has evaluated the demographics of the various services out there. Since some of the sites charge fees for full access (pictures, email, etc.) it can get expensive to try several without knowing whether the demographic is suited to your needs.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 10:28 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
Well Eharmony wasn't broad enough for me lol. I mean not even a nibble lol.

Legalboxer
Member

11-17-2003

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 10:43 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Legalboxer a private message Print Post    
define a nibble? :-) did people respond at all or were the people that did respond just not worth it?

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 10:51 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
No they said I had no matches at all. Now I know I'm weird but dang lol.

Spygirl
Board Administrator

04-23-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 10:59 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Spygirl a private message Print Post    
I did eHarmony and believe in the psychological basis behind it - it is sound personality matching with some good research backing it (I know the founder of eHarmony).

For those of you who remember #1, I met him through eHarmony. In fact, my hubby was signed up to eH at the same time, but he lived 90 miles away and I limited my search to 30 miles.

I did match.com and met a couple of men who turned out to be not at all what I was looking for. They were simply looking at pictures - quite superficial. I thought of it as merely an extension of a club during last call. Very distasteful.


Spygirl
Board Administrator

04-23-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:01 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Spygirl a private message Print Post    
Mocha, I'd view that as a good thing rather than a bad thing. It means you are selective in the type of men that would be a good match for you. I'm not sure how long you subscribed, but given your geographical location, I'd bet you'd have at least 3-5 matches within the first 30-60 days. Granted, I also understand the service is pretty pricey, so it may not be worth the hassle.

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:03 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
Oh heck I thought it was free lol. Maybe that's why I didn't get any matches.

Vacanick
Member

07-12-2004

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:14 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Vacanick a private message Print Post    
Mocha, if you don't pay to subscribe, you can't see the matches pictures or contact them. It can get pricey but I prefer eH to other places I've checked out.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:19 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Julieboo a private message Print Post    
Spy, who is #1? Your hubby? or your 1st husband??? I'm so confused...

Mocha
Member

08-12-2001

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:21 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Mocha a private message Print Post    
Ahh ok well I'm not paying them lol so I'll stick with the one I use.

Karuuna
Board Administrator

08-31-2000

Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 11:27 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post Send Karuuna a private message Print Post    
I did the eHarmony thing and got the same result as Mocha. Took me days to fill out their very long questionnaire, and after that I got a polite Email from them saying they had no suitable matches for me in my area. Very frustrating.

As for Match.com, I met too many crazy folks on there to ever try it again. Including the guy that was once the "grass" and the "wind". No, really, he was the wind. He swears it's the truth.