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Julieboo
Member
02-05-2002
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:15 am
I always thought I knew what I would say when this subject came up. But I actually don't!! My 5 year old asked where babies (and he) came from. He also wanted to know where baby cows and alligators, etc. come from. I thought this would be easy -- that they come out of their mom's belly. (I don't even like to say tummy, cuz that is not accurate). Or out of an egg (depending on the animal). Well he wanted to know how the babies got there (either in the egg or in the belly). Luckily I got him side tracked by asking him what animals come from eggs. So he forgot about the initial question-how do the babies get there. Any suggestions? I am not afraid to tell him the truth, well maybe-but only cuz I am afraid he will go around talking to other kids about penises or something.... (we always use the "actual" words.)
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:43 am
Whatever you do, don't wimp on the question. I totally wimped out when my ds was asking, and he really wasn't comfortable talking about sex with me for years. At this age, he probably isn't asking so much about the actual act of intercourse, but more how the egg gets in the belly. So, something like "a man makes something called a sperm, and a women makes something called and egg. When those two things meet inside the women's belly, a baby gets made. And then just go from there. (it was the go from there, that I wimped!) Funny, story about kids talking. When I had the exact same conversation using the exact same words with my ds. His next questions was "well, where does this sperm come from?" From your testicles. "what are they?" I point to his. His eyes light up, he gets so excited, he sort of grabs them and says "so that's what these things are for!!! I always wondered what they did!!!" I lived in fear he was going to tell everyone his discovery! LOL
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:45 am
btw..I am right now in the middle of a 3 Sunday class with my ds at church called "Sex, God and Me". Wonderful class, we did it two years ago when he was in 7th. So, just to let you know, the talking never ends.
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Julieboo
Member
02-05-2002
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:47 am
Thanks Annie! That is a great start. Funny about his testicles. Ryan already know what/where his testicles are. I'm sure he has no idea what they are for.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:49 am
I still giggle when I picture his face!
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Ladytex
Member
09-27-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:51 am
Julie, just make sure you answer the question he actually asks. I say that because a friend of mine's son was about 5 and asked "Where did I come from?", my friend explained about the sperm and egg, etc, and then her son said "No, I meant what city", lol...
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:52 am
Lady, I almost did that with my dd because I felt I had really dropped the ball with my son, so I sort of over compensated with her. I came very close to have one of those 'uh I meant what city' moments! LOL
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Julieboo
Member
02-05-2002
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 9:53 am
LOL Lady! Good point too!
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Wargod
Moderator
07-16-2001
| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 - 10:11 am
Hehe, we've been going through this for a few years now Julie, between the two kids. First time it came up, Caleb was 4 or so and my neighbor was pregnant. He asked a question and we looked at each other knowingly, took a collective breath and explained to him how the baby got in her belly and how it was going to get out. He looked at us completely horrified and said, "so there's really a baby in her tummy?" My first tip, answer what he's really asking. Talk to him a bit to find out what he really wants to know and then go from there. Be honest and unembarrassed, even if you have to practice on your husband and friends (that goes for hubby too.) I've always figured if the kids are old enough to ask, they're old enough for the answers. And it's hard sometimes when you know they're too young for all of it to figure out just how much to tell them, while still answering their questions openly and honestly without giving them too much information to absurb. So when Caleb started asking more detailed questions and Dakota hit us with some biggies, I went to the bookstore. "Where Did I Come From" is a great book. It's "Where Did I Come From" The facts of life without any nonsense and with illustrations by Peter Mayle. It was very imformative, and while it used the correct terms for everything it was also written in a way younger kids could grasp it. We read it to each other before reading it to either kid, and with Dakota did some selective editing to leave out some things she hadn't yet asked about. Anytime we talk to the kids about stuff like this, we always remind them that every family is different. And while we talk about it at home, it's an important discussion parents and their children should have at home together, so we'd prefer they don't share with their friends. Unfortunately it seems to be a big topic of discussion especially around Caleb's age group because he comes home quite often to tell me something he heard at school about how babies get here.
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Skootz
Member
07-23-2003
| Wednesday, April 13, 2005 - 3:42 am
We have had this question a few times. First a couple of years ago the girls and I were eating supper and my oldest dd asked. So I told her and then the phone rang..so that was the end of that conversation {whew} About a month ago, girls were asking their dad about when they were born,how long were they in the hospital, did it hurt etc (2 of them were premies and were in the hospital for a while) So then after a while, middle dd asks me about how a baby gets inside a tummy..so I told her that the father puts a seed inside the mommy, she of course asked "how?". So I told her and she has this ewwwwwww look on her face..then the little wheel in her head is going full speed and then she says "How does he know how much to put in?" I roared and then quickly calmed myself down, said sorry to dd for laughing and then we sort of let the conversation fade into something else. A moment and question I will never forget rotflmbo. I was always told, call the parts their actual names and if a child asks you, tell them, don't make a big deal out of it and they usually won't either.
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Julieboo
Member
02-05-2002
| Wednesday, April 13, 2005 - 5:05 am
Thanks Wargod and Skootz! Too funny about the "how much" part Skootz!!! I agree with using the correct terms. I used womb, testicles, penis, etc. Sometimes I use belly, but never tummy (tho I s'pose they are virtually the same) but I usually use womb. I s'pose I should use uterus though. That book looks perfect Wargod!
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Vacanick
Member
07-12-2004
| Wednesday, April 13, 2005 - 5:26 am
I have a funny story ~ My son and I were driving in the car when out of the blue, he asked me if I had nuts? I was surprised but tried to think of it from a 7 year old point of view. I asked him, peanuts, almonds, walnuts? He said no nuts in your private. Seems his father had used that word with him and he was just innocently repeating it. I explained to him that his "nuts" are actually called testicles and no mommy didn't have them because boys and girls were made differently. He was fine with that. I agree with using the correct terms. And giving just as much information as the child really needs. As funny as it was, I was glad that my son felt comfortable enough to ask me ... I hope that continues.
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, April 13, 2005 - 5:38 am
Funny story about the word 'womb'. My friend always used the word womb with her 5 year old dd. One day, mom comes into the master bedroom and finds the dd practically tearing it apart looking for something. The mom asks her what in the world she is doing. The dd says 'i am looking for a baby.' WHAT???? 'well, you said a baby grows inside the mommy's ROOM, so I am looking to see if one is growing here cause I don't like surprises!!!!' ROFL!
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