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Archive through October 22, 2004

The TVClubHouse: General Discussions: 2004 Aug - Oct: Dogs (ARCHIVES): Archive through October 22, 2004 users admin

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Whoami
Member

08-03-2001

Friday, October 15, 2004 - 2:51 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I forgot to add, for those who have been sending e-mails, e-cards, and messages in my folder. I've been reading them, and appreciating them wholeheartedly.

My eyes burn from all the crying. And I don't have much stamina to sit here and stare at the computer screen for very long periods of time like I usually do. So, even though I haven't responded, just know your efforts have not gone un-noticed.



Vee
Member

02-23-2004

Friday, October 15, 2004 - 3:17 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Oh, I'm sorry to read about your dog, Whoami. Just let those tears roll. And pretty soon, when you think of Boomer, it won't be with tears, it will be with smiles.

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Friday, October 15, 2004 - 3:31 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Don't worry about us Who, you take all the time ya need and we will all be here waiting when you feel like talking xoxoxoxooox

Egbok
Member

07-13-2000

Friday, October 15, 2004 - 7:39 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Oh Who, I'm just learning about Boomer. I just read your post from earlier today and I was so touched at what you shared with us. I'm so sorry for your loss Who. I hope that you'll be feeling better soon.

Seamonkey
Member

09-07-2000

Friday, October 15, 2004 - 10:18 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Who and Mom.. I'm also late to finding this out, but of course I went back in the story to hear about the fears, the hopes and then the feeling that he was alright and then.. he slipped away in such a loving and gentle way.. tears rolling down my cheeks for your loss. Oh I know that loss of those loving, lovely, large black furry ones.. mine were labradors and mine were girls but all the love and loss was there and even a decade or much more doesn't really erase the loss.. just dulls the sharp edge and allows the good memories to slip in front of the pain. But, that takes time and right now, I know it is very very hard to take.

I'm quite sure that you are right and he is appearing with and to you and others.. he's there with you, very concerned to see that you are alright, that Mom is okay, that Bomba is doing his duty. His spirit is there.

And that is good, but I know it can't fill the void left by a sturdy body to pat, a tail to wag, a big wet tongue to slurp and those warm, loving eyes.

So, I weep with you and for you, Who and Mom and of course your whole family.

Boomer was a lucky dog, indeed.

(and I hope he is playing with my Janina, my Grace and my Kizzy).

Halfunit
Member

09-02-2001

Saturday, October 16, 2004 - 7:23 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    


Reader234
Member

08-13-2000

Saturday, October 16, 2004 - 7:44 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
More {hugs} tears, and love your way dear Who, and no need to post individually, just post here, and continue to share, and pass the kleenex. You are so sweet, loving and caring!

Whoami
Member

08-03-2001

Saturday, October 16, 2004 - 7:32 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
You all are so sweet.

To answer some of the questions. Boomer was 81/2. Not really young for a large dog, but not really very old either.

We'll never really know for sure what was wrong. Naturally I'm beating myself up with all the "if only's" and "what if's." Would things have been different if I'd taken him in to the vet?

The vet herself said that if a dog gets ill for a couple of days, then is on the upswing and gets better, just about nobody would bring them in. She said if it was her own dog she wouldn't have brought him in. There's some solace in that I suppose.

She said one possibility was if there was a tumor on his spleen or something that was making him feel bad for a few days, then if it burst, the lack of pressure could have made him feel better. But if that was the cause, he could have been bleeding internally, and finally just bled to death. Or, it could have been something with his heart.

My older sister's dog had the spleen thing, and he was bleeding internally and in horrible pain. She had to take him in and have him put down. My other sister's dog also might have had a mass on her spleen. She went into convulsions and they had to rush her to the emergency vet. She was pretty much gone by the time they got there. Both of them were also sudden unexpected deaths.

I don't know if that's what could have been the case with Boomer, cause he never did any yelping, convulsing, etc. Of course, he was in bed with Mom when he went. I can't really ask Mom if he was doing any of those things, cause with her current mentality, she would not only take it as an accusation, but probably try to blame herself. I have to just trust the fact that, knowing he'd been off his feed earlier, and we were concerned about him, that if he'd been showing any of those symptoms she would have called for me.

I guess I have to console myself with the fact that if it was something like a tumor, or heart failure, I might have been able to prolong his life if I'd taken him in. But, it would have still been terminal (the vet told me this on Thursday). And then, he might have lived longer, but his condition would have steadily declined, and he would have ended up suffering in the long run.

Things are still hard. Every time I turn around I'm reminded of something that tells me he should be there. Like, I was on the phone, Bomba was outside, then came in. As I always do when they've been out and come back in, I go shut the door. I was distracted with the phone conversation, so as I went to the door after Bomba came in, I realized I was standing at the back door glancing around the yard waiting for Boomer to come in. I should have known better, Boomer usually came in first, and he'd help me get Bomba in. But, I was operating on auto-pilot, and it was telling me one dog was in, go get the other dog in and shut the door.

Today was also the first day Mom didn't get up before me. She usually gets up long after me, but once in a while she'll get up before me. Usually, the routine is that all three of us will go in and "check on Grandma." Bomba will run his head along the side of the bed, with his body just under the part of the blanket that hangs over the bed. He'll the sort of slide his head up to the head of the bed and sneak up and give Mom kisses. We said he kinda looks like a crocodile sliding up the bed under the covers. So, those are "crocodile kisses" she gets.

Boomer's "job" when we'd go check on Grandma was to jump up on the bed, run over and give her kisses, then curl up next to her in a snuggle, drape his paw over her body and glare at me defiantly with a "that's my Grandma. Don't you be making her get up just yet." So, of course Mom would tell me "just a few more minutes" while they snuggled.

Going in today without Boomer to "check on Grandma" was pretty heartbreaking. At least she got her crocodile kisses just fine.

I'm sure there are going to be a lot of moments where I'm going to miss all his wonderful traditions. I just have to remember not to slight Bomba and let him know all his wonderful traditions are still very cherished.

Serate
Member

08-21-2001

Sunday, October 17, 2004 - 8:16 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Oh Who I'm so sorry for your loss! I haven't been here for a few days, so started with the posts I hadn't read about. Was so happy to hear he was feeling better, then saw he passed. Rainbow Bridge has been busy this week! I hope you, your mom, and Bomba take comfort in the joyful memories you have of Boomer!

Urgrace
Member

08-19-2000

Monday, October 18, 2004 - 6:55 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
It's taken a few minutes for me to get over the tears streaming down my cheeks. I don't come over to this thread often, especially when I'm trying to catch up. Your love for Boomer has always shined through in your posts, and we all know he was special. I am so sorry for you and Whosmom, Ktbb and Grumpy too. Give Bomba a special snuggle for me.


Dahli
Member

11-27-2000

Tuesday, October 19, 2004 - 6:52 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Dear Who, your loss is one that I can understand and do know what it is like to lose part of a 'pair'... all of the things, routines and scenes that wove throughout your days are forever changed. I am very sorry for your loss, your descriptions are so vivid and heartbreaking. Please accept my deepest sympathy, I hope Bomba will understand and not be too lonesome.

Ophiliasgrandma
Member

09-04-2001

Tuesday, October 19, 2004 - 7:48 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
When you've healed a bit, Who, would you consider getting Bomba a step-sibling?

Whoami
Member

08-03-2001

Wednesday, October 20, 2004 - 1:52 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Well, I just brought Boomer's ashes home. At least now he's with us again.

I didn't have a very good day yesterday. Had to go to the store, and all I could think of was the last time I took a trip to the store, I was filled with happiness and relief, buying up a supply of dog food, and watching that wonderful face watch for me through the window as I drove up.

It was all I could do not to burst out in tears in the store. I held it together just enough, but cried all the way home, especially when I drove up the driveway to the empty window.

This first week is the hardest. Every day this week I think back to how, "last week at this time...." Maybe when I get this week out of the way, I can start the healing process. Crying really takes a lot out of me.

I'm still beating myself up with the "what if's." But the vet, while saying she naturally couldn't say for sure without knowing what was really wrong with him, felt that it wouldn't have made a difference if I had brought him in. One of my biggest fears is if I let him down, if I could have saved him.

She says I did nothing wrong, that dogs go through a couple days up "upset tummy" all the time, and most people wouldn't bring them in. Especially if they were improving.

She reminded me I gave him a good life, and he was happy and well cared for.

All these words from someone who actually is very lacking in people skills. KTBB and Grumpy both don't like her much, and she often leaves me feeling pretty intimidated. But, she's good with the animals, and she cares about their dignity and happiness. That's why we chose her. We figured if the Boys were comfortable with her, that was all that mattered.

A step-sibling isn't out of the question. But I think I need for it to be the right time, not just after a bit of healing or anything. All of our animals have come to us (rather than us seeking them out), in a "meant to be" fashion. When/if the time is right for Bomba and the rest of us, I have confidence that the next very special critter will find their way into our lives.

Thank you again for your wonderful support. It means so much to me to have a place to come vent, and to people who understand.



Juju2bigdog
Member

10-27-2000

Wednesday, October 20, 2004 - 6:07 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Whoami, now you've got me crying again. But I wanted to say that you know you never win the "what if" game. It is not up to you. YOU are not the higher power. Human behavior is strange, isn't it? We almost never seem to play the "what if" game in reverse, except for a little while, and then we just chalk it up to being lucky. Like two years ago when you were up most of the night playing mystery games here with the insomniacs and something good happened because of it.

Anyway, dearie, just do the best you can. It is hard.


Yankee_in_ca
Member

08-01-2000

Wednesday, October 20, 2004 - 6:31 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Whoami, I just wanted you to know that my thoughts have been with you over this past week, and I have been reading your posts here. My love to you.

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Wednesday, October 20, 2004 - 7:33 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Oh, don't even get me started on "what if..."

Did i ever tell you my Lucy story with her heartworm treatment and how that ended up killing her? If not, here is a short version.

We adopted Lucy in June of 2003. She had tested HW+ but had treatment for it. My vet said that treatment (which she got from the shelter) wasn't good enough, so he did it his way.

FF a year later. We get her retested (like you should a year after to make sure she is neg.) and she is still +. So vet suggests we re-do treatment. So we do. First week she is fine (you are supposed to keep the dog very still for 4 weeks, not letting heart rate go up.) Well, she is doing fine. On a sunday night, we are outside and she is roughhousing w/Charlie a bit. Not too rough though.

Well in middle of night I hear her, she is a mess, can't walk. I bring her outside about 6am. She is pooping blood. She ended up dragging herself to under some bushes while I call vet (as if she knew she was gonna die). I bring her to vet. They do IV. I wait. And wait. At 2pm they say she is doing a bit better, even sitting up. At 5pm, I bring DS and DH to visit her. She is looking horrible by now. Moaning as if it is the only way to communicate... My DS left a little ball in her cage so she wouldn't be lonely...

We leave. they call at 6:15 to say she arrested...

Well. This is where the "if onlys" start...if only I didn't let the vet do the treatment, if only i didn't let her run around, if only i didn't get her retested.

She was a young dog-only 2 years old, if that. Full of so much love. She was so needy that it was almost irritating. Had to be near people all the time. So much love.

So I went thru all the "what if's".. but it doesn't do any good.

We rescued her from a shelter and gave her one good and very happy year. So after she died, we waited a bit and decided to save another dog in her honor.

Do I get sad about her and feel somewhat guilty? YES. But then I look at Oreo (new dog) and know that he is living a good life with us.

I hope this story doesn't bring you down any. The point is that you can't tear yourself up with what ifs...They don't do anyone any good. And you deserve good.

Dahli
Member

11-27-2000

Thursday, October 21, 2004 - 8:55 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Oh Whoami, I went through the what ifs this past summer when I lost my Maxoom in a coursing accident. I really don't think it's possible not to... no matter what anyone says, that's where we have to go, to try it on to beat ourselves up - to put it out there - whatever the reason I don't think we can help it. I also remember sitting here and sobbing at all the kind words and caring support that people shared and thinking my pain would not stop. Blame and guilt and anger and grief, just seemed endless. There are no words that can bring him back to you but they can hopefully keep you upright until you are able to feel the healing start and your wounds begin to close a little bit. I still have very very tender spots which cause me to cry at least once a day, but take all the love and support we can send you till then and slowly your world will stop spinning and you can stop hurting so much.(((Whoami)))

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, October 21, 2004 - 1:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
http://www.arf.net/index.asp


About ARF

Baseball manager Tony La Russa and his wife, Elaine, co-founded ARF in 1991 after he rescued a terrified stray cat that ran onto the field during an A's-Yankees game.

From its humble beginnings, ARF has grown quickly, so that we are now able to rescue and find loving homes for more and more abused and abandoned cats and dogs each year.



We also have created programs that bring the healing touch of animals to at-risk youth and others who dearly need a good dose of unconditional love.

For more information about ARF's mission, history, programs or events, please click on one of the links at the left side of this page. To view the evolution of our new home from an empty lot to our beautiful new shelter, click on ARF's New Home.



Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, October 21, 2004 - 1:10 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Ya gotta root for the Cardinals all you animal lovers!!!

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Thursday, October 21, 2004 - 3:24 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Virtual Pet Adoptions

Vacanick
Member

07-12-2004

Friday, October 22, 2004 - 9:34 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
A co-worker of mine just adopted their second dog from ARF. She said she wouldn't do it any other way and has nothing but kind words to say about the organization.

Julieboo, do you work with ARF?

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Friday, October 22, 2004 - 10:09 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Nope. I live in Illinois. Yay for your co-worker!!!

Whoami
Member

08-03-2001

Friday, October 22, 2004 - 5:11 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Hi all!

Just thought I'd check in and let you know I'm doing ok. Getting through that first week was a real you-know-what. I think somewhere in the back of my mind, I was thinking of that Sci-Fi show on UPN (I think it was UPN) called Seven Days. In it, a secret government project had utilized alien technology, and could send a person back in time to divert various tragedies, and the time frame in which they went back in time was 7 days.

All week, I just kept thinking, if only I had that week back again, from the first day he didn't eat. Maybe I could have taken him in and had something done.

The logical side of me says it probably would have done no good. And even if there was something treatable, we may have prolonged his life, but he would have still been miserable and suffering.

Of course, the emotional side of me says I should have done something to save him.

It sure sucks when logic and emotion battle each other. Maybe that's why the Vulcans (Star Trek) opted to curtail emotion and let logic rule.

Thank you Julie and Dahli for sharing your "what if" stories again. I remember your stories, and ached for you all over again. I'm so sorry my own wallowing brought up such painful memories for you.



Neko
Member

08-03-2001

Friday, October 22, 2004 - 7:05 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
This is the first I've heard of Boomer's passing and I'd like to say how sad I am for your loss Who.
Boomer sounded like an amazing dog who is obviously very much missed.



I'm not sure if I posted this or not (Actually, I'm quite sure I didn't..) but my baby, Odée (As seen with me in my profile) has been getting into this really weird habit.
We moved to our new house in April '03 and everything seemed to be fine.
But now, Odée won't stop peeing indoors. He's been pretty good about it recently (Knock on wood) but there's always this one time..

He has regular spots, like downstairs in the basement, in front of the fridge, but also random spots, like my room, on my a teddy bear that was on the floor of my room (That was a weird spot) and if you leave a plastic bag on the floor, sure enough he'll probably pee on it.

We let him out numerous times through the day (3 at least) and usually at around the same time, but it seems as though sometimes, he'll go out, just sit there, we'll let him in, then he'll pee inside.

I've been trying to figure out what the reason was, wether it was being able to see the boxer across the way, or the numerous cats around, but nothing seems to make sense.

He's is getting along in the years (Turning either 10 or 11 this year) and I'd LIKE to be able to blame this on old age, but I think it's just laziness.
Should I try and re-housebreak him?? Or put in place a new "outdoors" schedule??

Julieboo
Member

02-05-2002

Friday, October 22, 2004 - 7:09 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Neko, what does your vet say about this? That is where I would start...