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Archive through May 20, 2004

The TVClubHouse: General Discussions: 2004 May - July: Free Expressions (ARCHIVES): Funny Daily Quotes: Archive through May 20, 2004 users admin

Author Message
Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 12:01 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I loved the Dorothy Parker one, SanFran. When I'm 80 and go to live in a cabin in the Maine woods (can you tell I like solitude?) I think I'll put that on my answering machine.

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 12:23 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"I don't intend for this to take on a political tone. I'm just here for the drugs."

Nancy Reagan, former First Lady



Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 12:25 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"I was so poor growing up ... if I wasn't a boy ...I'd have had nothing to play with."

Rodney Dangerfield



Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 12:28 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Last one for today:

"Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else."

Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)

Sanfranjoshfan
Member

09-17-2000

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 12:53 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"Of course I did, Dahling.....do you think I always smell like this?"
     
(supposedly uttered by Tallulah Bankhead when she was asked if she had just farted in an elevator!)

LOL:-)

Pamy
Member

01-02-2002

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 1:00 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
LOL! I love these

Mamie316
Member

07-08-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 1:18 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"I have a stepladder. It's a very nice stepladder but it's sad that I never knew my real ladder."
- Craig Charles

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 3:55 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Ok, sorry, couldn't resist. A friend just sent me this:

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.

Chris Rock

Rupertbear
Member

09-19-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 7:36 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
Albert Einstein


Sanfranjoshfan
Member

09-17-2000

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 9:29 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Once you can accept the universe as matter
expanding into nothing that is something,
wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
                    --Albert Einstein

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Sunday, May 16, 2004 - 10:40 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Loved those, RB and SanFran!


"I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."

A. Whitney Brown

Lumbele
Member

07-12-2002

Monday, May 17, 2004 - 9:41 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!
Golda Meir (1898-1978)


Mamie316
Member

07-08-2003

Monday, May 17, 2004 - 9:50 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?" - Art Hoppe

Sanfranjoshfan
Member

09-17-2000

Monday, May 17, 2004 - 10:13 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you."
--Rita Mae Brown

Rupertbear
Member

09-19-2003

Monday, May 17, 2004 - 10:47 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
LMAO! Oh too funny!

Mamie316
Member

07-08-2003

Tuesday, May 18, 2004 - 12:40 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"I'd hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone. But they've always worked for me." - Hunter S. Thompson

Rupertbear
Member

09-19-2003

Tuesday, May 18, 2004 - 2:22 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
Anonymous

Lumbele
Member

07-12-2002

Tuesday, May 18, 2004 - 2:35 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
Every speaker has a mouth.
An arrangement rather neat.
Sometimes it's filled with wisdom.
Sometimes it's filled with feet.
Robert Order


Sanfranjoshfan
Member

09-17-2000

Tuesday, May 18, 2004 - 2:49 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.  ~Author Unknown

Mamie316
Member

07-08-2003

Wednesday, May 19, 2004 - 12:36 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"If at first you don't succeed.....so much for skydiving." - Henny Youngman

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 8:06 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"Lawyers, I suppose, were children once."

Charles Lamb (1775-1834)

Mamie316
Member

07-08-2003

Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 9:00 am   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television." - Woody Allen

Rupertbear
Member

09-19-2003

Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 12:33 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
Mahatma Gandhi

Herckleperckle
Member

11-20-2003

Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 1:54 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
"I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and have bought jewelry."

Rita Rudner

Lumbele
Member

07-12-2002

Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 3:30 pm   Edit Post Move Post Delete Post View Post    
What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.
Oscar Levant (1906-1972)