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March
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 10:01 am
What if you asked them if you could go in for a day, to see how things run and get to spend some time with the kids. I don't know if you work everyday at UPS but if you had a day off in there or even going in for the day until you had to go to work at UPS might give you the insight of the job that you are looking for.
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Sasman
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 10:24 am
Just want to make sure I understand: you will be making the same per hour but since you are working twice as much, your gross will double? If this is the case, then I would take the new job. Life is all about taking risks. Your UPS job may be easy and fun but what about career wise? Sounds like a dead-end to me. The new job might be real good for your resume. Another thing is that if they want you they might be open to negotiating the starting date.
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Whoami
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 1:43 pm
My sister had the same type of job. She didn't do well in it at all. She also had the "work with troubled kids" interest for her field of work. But then, she also had a very naive "save the world with my good work" attitude, and "it won't happen to me" way of thinking on the high stress stuff. She also had a lot of problems with some of the rules and regulations that didn't really seem to benefit the kids (it was a home where the kids lived there). She felt like there were things that would help the kids, that she wasn't allowed to do because of the rules. I really can't remember details, since it's been a while. If you don't make a decision by tonight, I'll try calling sis and see if she has any advice to offer.
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Kaili
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 2:19 pm
Well, I decided to accept the job, but I have been playing phone tag with the woman I need to get ahold of. I called this morning and was told she was in a meeting. I took off for awhile and missed her call. She said she's be in until noon. It's almost 3 and I just returned the call. I'm trying again tomorrow, but I would love to hear what your sister has to say, Whoami. The woman doesn't like to hire social work grad because she doesn't think they were trained to use creativity and feels they tend to come out too rigid and with too much of the "no personal involvement" outlook. This woman feels that you need to be involved with the kids, or rather they need the personal involvement because many come from pretty dysfunctional homes and the program can serve as a surrogate parenting kind of thing at times. I guess a lot of the kids are fetal alcohol kids as are many of their parents. The whole point of the program is to keep the kids in the community. This woman seems pretty...willing to try anything that might help. But then again, I may be wrong.
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Texannie
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 2:42 pm
Good luck! Hope this turns out to be a wonderful job for you!!!
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Kaili
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 2:59 pm
Thanks- I'll let you guys know more tomorrow once I get a hold of the woman. For all I know, she got sick of trying to get a hold of me! It's only been since Friday though, and I don't think the weekend really counts
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Whoami
| Monday, November 17, 2003 - 10:37 pm
OK Kaili, just got done talking to sis.... As I read your posts to her, the first comment she made was after I read what you'd said about the woman, and her views on personal involvement with the kids. That was her worst problem with where she worked, cause of them stressing "don't get involved." When I read that part of your post to her, she said she'd take the job in a heartbeat. Remember I told you earlier the politics of the job are what got to her the worst. Her hands were constantly tied in what she wanted to do, and what she was instructed to do for the kids. She got a lot more reserved and concerned when she found out that the kids live at home. She says you can create a bond with a kid, and really start towards success, only to have them go home, get abused by a parent, and come back in worse shape, and you have to start all over again. She says she'd rather work in a lock down, or at least a residential facility, where the kid is away from the abusive home environment, and that if they were allowed to go home, that would seriously make her reconsider the job at all. She said it was heartbreaking to make progress with a kid, only to have them come back from home one day all beat up or whatever, and the kid is right back to the way they were when they first came to the facility. She also had the same thought as I did when I originally read the part about the woman wanting to know if you'd been involved in athletics. It's not about your showing you don't mind getting hurt. Its more about whether you are physically fit to do the job. They (at my sis's facility) were trained to do "take downs" when the kid got physically violent. I don't know what the protocol for the facility is where you may be working, but if you've already been warned about biting, punching, kicking...chances are you may be required to physically restrain a kid at one point or another. She says to be prepared for this job to be your life while you do it, cause it will "drain you dry" (those are her exact words). She thinks you need to put your heart and soul into it, for the kids' sake. My question then would be, if this isn't the career path you were intending for yourself, is this what you really want to do, and are you willing to put your heart and soul into it while you do it? For the benefit of the kids, that may be one of the most important questions you need to ask yourself. I'm thinking the kids will be very perceptive on who is really into the job, and who is not. This paragraph though is all about my personal opinion, and not from any experience or training, so maybe I'm all wet! Sis wishes you all the luck, and wanted me to pass that on to you. She says she would still be there (where she worked) if it weren't for the aforementioned politics. She really did love the work, and feeling like she could make a difference in the kid's lives.
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Kaili
| Tuesday, November 18, 2003 - 2:20 pm
Whoami, thank you so much for talking to your sister and everything- I do apreciate it. Here's where it stands right now. I talked to the woman who runs the program. I'm going to go in on the day after Thanksgiving because I don't work that day and they will have the kids all day. I'm going to stay for the whole 10-6 shift. I told her that I am very interested and that before anything I would like to take the time to get to know the kids and staff better and get a better understanding of what they do and what "activity therapy" sessions are. It's also a stall tactic By then my 2 week notice for UPS would be mid-December and I think it would be easier to ask for a January start date at that time. Tell sis thanks for me!!!!
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Texannie
| Tuesday, November 18, 2003 - 2:24 pm
Great thinking Kaili!!!
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March
| Wednesday, November 19, 2003 - 7:28 am
Kaili, Sounds like a great plan, hope everything works out for you.
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 12:58 am
I've spent all night shopping online for Valentine's Day for family members. I still haven't decided on what to send (usually send plants/flowers or See's Candy). However, this has brought up a question that I can only ask you, my TVCH friends. Do you send (or exchange) Valentine gifts with family? I have never received a gift from my family (since an adult). I'm talking about family members not living with you. Also, what about cards...do you send cards and no gifts (or do you just agree not to do anything about the day)? Just wondering.
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Kaili
Member
08-31-2000
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:06 am
I'm a card person, and that's generally limited to parents and grandparents. No family gifts since I was a kid. Well, my mom usually sends a card and some candy. The thing is, sometimes she wants to try the chocolate first and my mom is unable to eat a whole anything (You should see her loaves of bread- torn pieces everywhere in the bag, or the cookies- always halves!!) so I'll get a chocolate heart with a little bite taken from it, rewrapped in the foil (or a box of chocolates with one or two missing). I think it's cute 
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:11 am
I think that is cute, too, Kaili.
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Sillycalimomma
Member
11-13-2003
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:20 am
I usually send cards to all of the grandparents and if I have the cash some candy as well or a cute bear to the grandmas. I also make sure my Aunt gets something too. I have a daughter now so she makes the cards and we send it all out from her-she always gets gifts from them all during Valentines day.
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Ducky
Member
08-27-2000
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:22 am
That is so cute Kaili! We would always get up every morning on Valentines or Easter and there would always be special surprises for us on the kitchen table from mom. But now that we are adults mom just sends us a card and the grandkids a card with a couple of dollars in it. Little Ducky takes Valentines to school so I use the extra's for my nieces and nephews and add a heart shape sucker. My sisters Anniversary is on Valentines so she is the only one that I really by a gift for. I send my mom a Valentines day card every year!
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Wargod
Member
07-16-2001
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:41 am
We do the same thing with left over Valentine's Ducky. The kids give them to their cousins. I also get my mom and my aunt a card, and my closest friend (she adopted me several years ago and spends half her time mama'ing me) I send the same type of card to as I do my mom. We give the kids a small gift and a card.
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Ducky
Member
08-27-2000
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 1:50 am
One year I bought Big Ducky a Wheel Barrow and shovels.
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Egbok
Member
07-13-2000
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 2:17 am
I'm a card person. I send to my mother, sisters and a four special friends that I've known since high school days. For my kidlets, I've always put together a Valentine goodie bag filled with whatever my little heart desires...and they usually love it! These days I have to mail them the goodie bag since they're not up in their bedrooms anymore....LOL!
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 9:21 am
Not really. Will do something for the kids and a card for dh...sort of think Valentine's is a silly holiday.
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Gidget
Member
07-28-2002
| Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 12:50 pm
Sorry couldn't get past the Sees candy... lol... never too old for Sees... I have gotten a Valentine from my Daddy every year for... well let's just say a lot of years... lovers have come and gone but I am still Daddy's girl.
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Sunday, February 08, 2004 - 12:38 am
thanks for the responses.
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Sunday, March 14, 2004 - 6:37 pm
I've been asked about finding matching mother daughter outfits (for easter). I found storybookonline.com. Does anyone know about online sites for such clothing. (ages, 30 something, 14, 2) Thanks for any help.
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Sunday, March 14, 2004 - 11:12 pm
eeeeekk! i hate my own question. the more i "google", the more sick i get. i don't know why I (meaning WHY ME?) was asked this question. i think because i know about shopping online. matching outfits to "whoever/whenever" is something, for some reason (since i think i was about 6 years old),i've always hated. not to put it down for others. i know it can be cute..and i love cute. it's just that, for some reason, it's something that i just can't stand. amazing i was asked this. anyway, since i already gave the above link....i've decided to just suggest "something else" (without giving my opinion about the "matching outfit" thing). i think just matching one color (for the 3 outfits) would be best in linen or cotton (for all 3) and/or a seamstress to make all 3. this after realizing the 3 outfits would be about $300 already made at the site above. i know of a few people to make the dresses...just wondering if anyone here interested? if so, check out the site i mentioned above and let me know if you can match their price. eta: http://www.storybookonline.com/storybook/store/category.asp?id=5 btw, the above site is the best site i found.
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Sunday, March 14, 2004 - 11:18 pm
well, if money is no object, and you want true quality, try the wooden soldier for matching mother/daughter clothes.
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Abby7
Member
07-17-2002
| Sunday, March 14, 2004 - 11:21 pm
thanks tabby. however, money IS AN OBJECT. $300 is the price i mentioned. no way is money not an object. (i never said that money is not an object, so not sure why you posted that). i'm not sure if you are joking...but i'll check out wooden soldier. thank you, tabby! ETA: oops,guess "wooden soldier" is a joke. sorry, didn't get it. (i'm slow). usually get your jokes though and love them.
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