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Marysafan
Member
08-07-2000
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 11:30 am
Our wedding story would have been titled "The Unimportant Wedding". This is a long story and probably not all that interesting, but it's our story. I met hubby when my current boyfriend's car broke down and he needed transportation for our date. Hubby agreed to be our driver for the evening. Our first meeting did not go well as he took great pleasure in teasing me and learned quickly that he could "push my buttons" much to his delight. A week later was my 17th birthday, and the only way my boyfriend could come is if I invited "the instigator" so I okayed it. He was introduced to my best friend and they hit it off. So the four of us would often double date all through my senior even after I changed boyfriends late that fall. Like it or not..."the instigator was a part of my life". The summer of 1968 after graduation, hubby learned that he was about to be drafted so he enlisted in the Navy. We had a going away picnic for him that August (that was a total disaster), and I thought that would be the last time I would ever see him. My best friend left for college, and I started to work full time at the hospital with a dream of pursuing a nursing career. While hubby was in boot camp, he realized how much he missed our back and forth bantering, and easy discussion about sports. He soon discovered much to his dismay, that he missed me more than my best friend. About this time, I suffered an appendix attack and ended up in the hospital with emergency surgery. My best friend wrote to her boyfriend to tell him and suggested he drop me a line. She was at a college where there were 19 guys for every girl, so she had already decided that she was not going to continue their long distance relationship. When he came home on leave, he went to see her at her college and they decided to go their separate ways. Then he called me wanting to "talk". We went out for a "coke" that lasted until 4:00am. During the course of our "talk", he kissed me and I realized much to my dismay that the biggest pain in my butt was also the love of my life. I saw him five times during that week he was home, and broke up with my boyfriend. He went back to San Diego for a month and we wrote every day. He came home again for two weeks leave at Christmas. We decided then that we wanted to get married. We decided to make it "official" and started announcing the fact to our friends and family. That was the beginning of the uproar. Everyone was shocked. Few people even knew we had been dating or even that we had left our prior relationships. Things went downhill from there. My future Mil was so upset that he would even consider such a thing, that she instructed him to leave for San Diego at once. He ended up spending his last night of leave sleeping on the sofa at our house. His father learned of our impending nuptuals by reading about it in the newspaper as his mother wouldn't allow the subject to be discussed. We knew that we wanted to married as soon as possible because more than anything, we just wanted to be together. The next time he could get leave to come home was in August, so I started to plan the wedding for then. (His mother assumed that I must be pregnant...not an easy thing for a virgin...but I digress). About this time, I had been having a crisis of faith, and decided to discontinue attending church. My mother insisted that I had to be married in the church as it would "kill my grandmother" otherwise. My mother also started putting in her two cents in other areas. I had to invite ALL the relatives because it would be impossible to leave anyone out. My sister who was 15 was to be my maid of honor, and she and my grandmother would make my gown. How could I invite my friends, my best friend was his old girlfriend and surely I couldn't have her there as people would talk, and if I couldn't have my best friend there then I couldn't invite any of my friends because my best friend would feel left out....and on and on it went. A month passed and then we were into February. We were both miserable being apart and we decided we were wasting valuable time that we could be together so hubby suggested that I come out to San Diego and be married out there. My Dad seeing the misery I was in agreed that that would be the best thing to do. (That's how I knew how much my Dad really loved me). So, being that in April 1969 there was supposed to be this HUGE earthquake that was going to put California into the ocean (and knowing that I didn't want to be around when that happened) we set the date for May 3rd, and I would leave on May 1st (if there was no earthquake). Grandma and mom got the dress made and I completed my hope chest...and on the morning of May 1st, at the ripe old age of 18, I got on a plane to San Diego. Hubby called to inform his parents of the plan and his sister insisted that whole family go to the airport to see me off. Although, no one was in favor of the idea, they all seemed to be making the best of the situation. Then I got on the plane and our plans fell apart. While I was on the plane, it was discovered that hubby wouldn't be 21 until November and that he could not get married unless he had parental consent. He called home to ask his parents to sign the necessary forms and get them in the mail asap. His mother replied, "If the state of California thinks you are too young to get married, then you obviously are. When Mary arrives, tell her that she must return home, and you must wait until you are older." Hubby replied, "I have never asked you for anything in my life, and the only thing I am asking you for now, is your blessing, and if you can't give me that...then you can go to hell." He had never spoken back to his parents before, and I understand that his name wasn't spoken in that house for six months. When I arrived, hubby told me that we would not be getting married on Saturday, but not to worry we would figure something out. He took me to our new little apartment, and we sat and talked for a long, long time. He said, "You gave up everything to come out here to marry me, do you love me enough in spite of all this to stay?" I told that I wasn't going anywhere. At that point, it seemed like it was he and I against the world and somehow we were going to over come this...together. We formed a tight bond in those early days that would serve us well through all the years and trials ahead. That night I became his wife, and we still privately celebrate May 1st as the beginning of our marriage. We wanted to be married legally and looked into our options. We even went so far as to get married in Tijuana in July,(wedding day #2), but the Navy wouldn't accept it as legal because he still wasn't 21. Finally November, arrived. Hubby and I met with the Navy Chaplin. We told him our story. He agreed to marry us after a few weeks of "instruction". We could be wed in the Navy chapel. Not the big church, the small chapel, no problem we just want to be married. And we wouldn't have music because the fellow who played the organ was on leave, no problem we just want to be married. And it had to be early in the morning because another wedding was booked in the afternoon in the big church...no problem we just want to be married. So finally on December 6th, 8 of my husband's classmates, two wives, and my friend from work, gathered at the chapel. I got to wear my dress and all the guys wore their sailor suits. There wasn't a dry eye in the place, even the chaplin had tears in his eyes, as we took our vows. We just wanted to be married. Afterwards, we all went out for breakfast, then hubby and spent the afternoon at Sea World while everyone else went and got my friends apartment ready for the party that night. Our cake was a wedding gift from one of the married classmates, it was homemade and the topper was slightly damaged so they got a huge discount...it was all they could afford. I still have it, as it meant so much. Everyone had a great time because everyone knew how much this meant to us, and they were so glad to be able to share our joy. Two weeks later the class graduated and we all went out separate ways, and we never saw any of them again. The wedding was never important, but the marriage meant everything. It still does. On May 1st it will be 35 years.
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Ddr
Member
08-19-2001
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 12:06 pm
Pass the kleenex... Thanks for sharing Marysafan
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 12:34 pm
how sweet, marys!!
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Froggiegirl621
Member
02-14-2003
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 12:39 pm
What a great story! 
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 12:48 pm
makes my future wedding look like trump.
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Landi
Member
07-29-2002
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 1:10 pm
pass the kleenex! <sobbing> that was wonderful mary! i'm so happy for the two of you!
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Wink
Member
10-06-2000
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 2:15 pm
Mary that is a beautiful story. Congrats to both of you on your perseverance.
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Cjr
Member
08-11-2002
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 3:52 pm
What a great thread! ROFL at Tabby's wonderful 1st wedding! I'll be first in line to read the book! Mak1, Cambria is my favorite city in California. It is the most beautiful place. It looks like you are in the mountains only to come upon the ocean! I just love it. I hope you all have a wonderful time and the wedding turns out perfect! Marysafan, I love your post. It is a true love story! As for my wedding, I got married in Las Vegas after having tried on dresses and veils and hating every second of it. My fiance agreed that going to Las Vegas was a great idea. He had a big wedding his first marriage and really didn't care about another one. I wanted a small simple ceremony. I loved my Vegas wedding, with my parents and sister and her husband as the only guests. The only problem was when the minister came out with a huge feather in her hat and started talking in her high squeaky voice I lost it! All I did was laugh hysterically through the whole ceremony. Could not stop! My poor husband was doing his best not to laugh also but I broke him! Then my Mom and sister started and my Dad and BIL were trying to hide under the seats, they were so embarrassed. Reverend Maxine stopped in the middle of the ceremony and very sharply told me this was a serious affair. I kept nodding my head yes but couldn't stop laughing. She just went ahead with the ceremony, I nodded yes instead of saying "I do" and that was that! We had a wonderful 3 days in Vegas, a great party the following weekend at my cousin's home and a lot of funny years. I am so glad I didn't get married in front of everyone I knew. It would have been totally humiliating!
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Reader234
Member
08-13-2000
| Friday, February 20, 2004 - 4:31 pm
Here Here!! Wonderful... Well, since Mary stepped up, I cant compete with Tabby (or for that matter none of y'alls!!) I wont even try... but after this morning, I thought I'd share... High School, 1976, all my good friends graduate and go to college, I look up my old friends from my other school I've known since Kind. and low and behold this guy had moved, and was a part of my ole clique.... Nice bantering, high school style, group dates etc. Valentines Day 1977 he transposed my music for me, and yes he included a sweet Valentine... Spring Break I went to Florida with the Band, and he had my itenerary and called me, and asked me to prom. I was thrilled (didnt go my jr year, no one looked promising to ask me this my senior year, except a dear friend...) Prom doubled and his best friend and his date FOUGHT the whole time. Set the mood for our relationship, respect each other at all costs. Still holds true. We went our seperate colleges, I dated around, he didnt. He got lost, but never dated anyone. He proposed my senior year in college (umm he is younger than me btw! *G) Our parents were less than thrilled. His parents were always trying to set him up (I kinda was too, we were on and off throughout my 4 years of college) Wedding plans went forward. I was student teaching near our families home. I found out I wasnt going to graduate unless I retook a class (the prof died, huge mess, I took the class w/o paying the tuition, but I had to retake the stupid class) SO I'm doing invitations by myself 6 hours from home, I hadnt a clue what the darn tissue paper was for, or how to address the things. But they were done in time. My dress, a mentor from church found this warehouse and went with me when I tried on dresses, I couldnt decide between 3, went back to the dorm, picked up my bride's magazine, and one of the dresses was on the cover, I got the dress for $99!! I took all 3 of his sisters as bridesmaids, during one of the showers his mom and sister came with a hangover, and sat 3 tables away from everyone, arms crossed the whole time. (believe you me, they thought me a hillbilly - and my family too, we were all classless - and when his sister got married, they showed us how to do it "right". They didnt invite my parents, they had a 'coctail' reception, at 6:30pm, and dh's relatives wondered what was up!! lol) Our church was the church I went to for years. The reception was at the VFW, and it was buffet style in those throwaway containers. I had a champagne fountain without booze, so the kids could play in the punch!! Open bar, and my aunts ex staffed it. I invited my 5th grade class, and had lots of cousins, and one of my cousins made a pinata, so we had a party for the kids at the reception. I sold my car to buy his wedding ring. The night of the rehearsal dinner my dad and his mom sat with their heads together thinking of a way to cancel the wedding. His parents refused to pay for anything but the rehearsal dinner, which was held at his house. Maybe $2,000 total. We spent our night at the Howard Johnsons, with a bottle of opened cold duck in the bathroom sink with ice, and around 3am we awake to a bursting fountain of pink stuff we had to clean up!! We drove to our one bedroom apartment for our honeymoon, 4 days before his senior year of college. We went to the Indiana State Fair for a day! 3-4 years later we had our "honeymoon" in Jamaica... or was it the time we went to Macinac Island for a week???? His family still doesnt think it will last!! Our first big fight 8 months into our marriage, she wrote him a blank check to get a divorce... it made us get serious, and grow up!! We actually dont talk with his mom or sisters.... yet, but you never know, there is always hope - we've made it this far together!! ...oh, and for this morning? Well, dh stayed home from work,(he drove down to bring our first born home for tomorrows big day, for me!) and as I was waking up he ran and jumped into bed... just to give me a good morning hug, and kiss, and tell me he loves me!! I truly am blessed!!
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Monday, February 23, 2004 - 9:54 am
i would like to hear more wedding stories. i also want to see what GAL has started planning for her special day. i am pretty sure i will not get my trump wedding as described above, because, funny thing here: my husband won't even let me date!

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Goddessatlaw
Member
07-19-2002
| Monday, February 23, 2004 - 6:15 pm
Wwwwweeeelllll, I'm in a holding pattern til we get over to see the proposed chapel this weekend. If he gives it the "otay", then I'll have something to write about. In the meantime, he's going to take pictures of my dress and veil so I can post them for everyone to see. Yay. Tabby, Colossus won't let me date, either, even though he gets to date Granny. I love hearing everyone's stories, I hope you keep them coming. I'm also taking copious notes from Moondance - she seems to have the situation covered.
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Grannyg
Member
05-28-2002
| Monday, February 23, 2004 - 7:28 pm
gal, you know colossus and i have a secret thing going. don't be telling EVERYBODY. they'll want to be hanging on my fellow. besides we are all just figments of juju's imagination. so no worries about our SECRET dating.
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Monday, February 23, 2004 - 7:36 pm
i am going to be GAL's cyberMIL. gosh, i hope i'm not like lanny's mom eheheheheheheheeee!
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Froggiegirl621
Member
02-14-2003
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 12:01 pm
Anyone in TVCH land do alterations? I have a ton of questions to ask about wedding dresses with tulle skirts! Also...how would one store a white wedding gown until her wedding in approx. a year and a half???
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Froggiegirl621
Member
02-14-2003
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 3:44 pm
Ok, maybe if I post my questions I'll get some answers... 1. Is it possible to bustle a tulle skirt? 2. How do they go about altering the length of a tulle skirt? Cut the tulle??? 3. Anyone know how many sizes you can alter down without a dress looking weird or changing the complete look of the dress? Reason I'm asking all these questions is that I came upon a REALLY GOOD DEAL on my dream dress! The catch is I have to make a decision ASAP (by close of business tomorrow) or I'll lose the deal. I have not tried the dress on, but it is a size 8 and the measurements match mine pretty closely (except that I'm a midget and the length will need to be dealt with). Also it has a chapel length train that is not detachable and I refuse to dance with a train! So if it can't be bustled, I'm not even going to try to buy the dress. I need some input from you guys! Do you think I'm being foolish by buying a dress a year and a half from my wedding date? I'll try to attach a pic so you all can see how beautiful it is. Any feedback is welcomed!!!
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Froggiegirl621
Member
02-14-2003
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 3:49 pm

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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 3:49 pm
froggie, i heard to store a white wedding gown in light blue tissue paper, otherwise it will yellow, along with the tissue as it yellows. no it's not silly to buy it this far in advance, especially if you love it. i would guess you would not be able to alter a dress more than one size, but it beats having to go up a size and not have any extra fabric in the dress. i hope someone who really knows can answer your fabric questions. c'mon everyone, "it's tulle time!"
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Tabbyking
Member
03-11-2002
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 3:53 pm
beautiful dress, by the way!!
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Goddessatlaw
Member
07-19-2002
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 3:57 pm
I don't have any answers for you, Froggie, but I do want to say that the dress is gorgeous!
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Moondance
Member
07-30-2000
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 4:17 pm
LOVE the dress Froggie!
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Texannie
Member
07-16-2001
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 4:49 pm
The dress is gorgeous, but I have no idea about the alterations.
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Moondance
Member
07-30-2000
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 5:09 pm
Froggie I have a call into my main bridesmaid ... they picked out dresses similar to your dress ... actually they look like the dress on sex in city (last show - Carrie had on the green tulle dress - very Dior anyway it looks like that one) so they need to be hemmed ... I will get the low down on how they will do it and let you know.
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Froggiegirl621
Member
02-14-2003
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 5:14 pm
Thanks everyone! And thanks a lot Moon!!! Please let me know as soon as you know. I think I'm gonna get the dress!!!!!!!
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Hippyt
Member
09-10-2001
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 5:25 pm
Wow,that dress is beautiful!
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Grannyg
Member
05-28-2002
| Wednesday, February 25, 2004 - 6:27 pm
BEAUTIFUL DRESS!!!!!!!!! Froggie, at one time I had my own business of renting/buying prom/evening dresses. So I am fairly familiar with the alterations that would need to be done. By far, the greatest feat would be hemming the dress. That is a lot of dress around the bottom and depending on how much it would need to be hemmed, that job could be massive. And you have to be very certain the person you get to do the alterations has some experience with wedding dresses. As far as the the bust, waist that should be fairly easy and not difficult at all. You would have to really remake the dress if you needed it any smaller than one size. And that is because of the fullness of the skirt. As far as the bustle goes if it can't be done that way, you could always make a wrist slip and slip it on your wrist and that would take up the back. It would pull the back up enough that I think you would be just fine in it for dancing. Again, I think the dress would probably be fine except for the length. How much to long do you think it would be? If it is a Misses size, that would fit someone up to 5' 9" or maybe 5' 10". If you are petite around 5'2" or shorter you are looking at having to take off about 8 inches or so. That, I think, should be your biggest concern. Can you find out the length overall from the shoulder to the hem? I hope I've helped answer some of your questions.
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