Author |
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Zachsmom
Member
07-13-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:03 am
but kmjm, vincent has known and seen for 23 years.
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Kmjm
Member
05-19-2002
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:08 am
I've watched Dick and Dani interact live and I believe that I'm entitled to my opinion about what I've seen with my own eyes. Also, I feel that Vincent has his own biases as we all do when making judgements about our family members. I think What's assessment of Vincent's possible motivations has a lot of merit.
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Zachsmom
Member
07-13-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:23 am
kmjm, you are entitled as am i i have never seen dick be anything but wanting the best for dani and wanting to repair their relationship. heck, dani hasn't talked to her brother for over 8 months because he refused to loan her nintendo games (he knew she wouldn't return them) so i would say that a lot of this is on dani, not dick. no one here was around when dick gave custody of his children to his mother. no one. to assume it was because he wanted to travel and do drugs is just pure speculation and his son, who was there, says that is false. his son said his father was always there for them. always. just because a parent doesn't live in the household or have totally custody does not mean they are a bad parent. if that were the case, most all divorced dads would not be considered parents as they only see their kids every once in a while.
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Kmjm
Member
05-19-2002
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:28 am
Just to add- if we are going to base our judgement on what has been written by this family on the internet, then let's include all that they have written. Go and read all of Dick's blogs on his Myspace. It gives some pretty good insight on what has been most important to him for most of his adult life, and it sure wasn't his kids. He kinda fit them in when he wasn't busy drinking, taking drugs and travelling. Now that he's burned himself out and older, he wants to make up for lost time. Vincent's willing to give him what he wants, Dani isn't. I don't blame her, even though I think she acts like a brat.
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Aerojunki
Member
06-30-2004
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:29 am
Good post, Zachsmom
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Zachsmom
Member
07-13-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:32 am
kmjm, i read dani's live journal, she has nothing but positive comments about her dad and the fun dates and times they spent together. she called him her best friend.
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Zachsmom
Member
07-13-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:32 am
thank aerojunki!
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Milosmom
Member
06-10-2006
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:35 am
I have spoken to Vincent in chat and he says the same sort of things as he says on his threads. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt on this one. I think Dick and Dani can have a good relationship if they both work at it and do NOT read the internet for at least a year.
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Kmjm
Member
05-19-2002
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 6:37 am
Zachsmom, I have never disputed anyhone else's right to their opinion on this board, and I would certainly not dispute your right to yours! I was responding to the fact that as soon as anyone criticizes Dick, sooner or later someone will say they have no right to judge! I find this support of Dick no matter what he does or has done disturbing. This doesn't seem to happen when Dani is criticized though. So Dani's blog, written for a public audience, is to be taken as more truthful than what we have heard coming from her own mouth? Alrighty then....
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 7:13 am
FWIW, we have seen Dick and Dani interact in a house where a game is being played for $500K. A little different that real life, yes? Those of us who dispute comments about Dick are disputing statements of opinion that are made as fact (for example, the "fact" that Vincent and Daniele grew up in an "abusive household"). That is not fact, and I'll dispute it till the end of time. And yes, anything she writes in her blog (which is really sream of consciousness) is more truthful than anything I'd misinterpret while she's in the house, playing a game, surrounded by people she dislikes, trying to get to that $500K prize.
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What555456
Member
06-14-2005
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 7:26 am
Thank you for the clarification, Land. If I took your words the wrong way, I apologize. No, I do not think Vincent is the best judge of his relationship with his father and what motivates him in this relationship; especially when we have a dysfunctional family, but even if we did not have one. I doubt I am objective enough to understand what truly motivates me with my parents. And I certanly do not expect him to say anything negative about his father to a total stranger, especially if he wants to maintain a good relationship with his father who, as we all know, can abuse with the best of them if someone crosses him. Hell, there are lots of thigns I might say about my parents to my brothers and sisters but in public, no one would ever hear such complaints. I do not accept the theory of so many here that because Dick admits he has been less than a stellar father but now supposedly wants to right everything, that the fault for things being so toxic lies with his children -- or at least one of his children. I think all he wants is the type of family relationship HE chooses to have but never was willing to work to achieve. Nor do I believe that Vincent and Dick resolved everything and their relationship is totally healed after spending a night of bonding in a strip club -- which is the story that Dick gave of how he made nice with Vincent. To bring this back to the topic of the thread. We have seen Dick spend all summer sometimes demanding, sometimes begging that Dani treat him the way he expects to be treated. When she does not comply, he gets whiney and self-pitying, blaming her for not healing the pain because he does not get what he wants. We have also seen Dani spend the entire summer sometimes demanding and sometimes begging that Dick do what she wants -- leave her alone. When he does not, she gets all whiney and self-pitying, because she does not get what she wants. The exact same from both. We have also seen both of them use the other HG's and abuse the other HG's. Dick by far the greatest and most vile of abusers, but Dani standing right behind him and urging him on. The are both the same in this regard as far as I am concerned. And finally, I do not buy in any way at all that Dick played for the two of them and she played for herself. They both used each other. Neither would be in the F2 had they not been a team and agreed to play as one from before they entered the house. The cooperated when it was in their individual interest and they used each other when it was in their individual interest. I see not difference in how the two used each other. Now it is between the two of them. Dani wants to win and makes no bones about it. From what we have heard about the Q&A, Dick undercut Dani in order to gain the votes of the jury. He too obviously wants to win, although is more nuanced and kows how to play on public sympathy. But he is no different in his motivation than Dani. They each want to win and make the other one lose. Both the same. I see very little difference between the two, oither than they personalities express the same thing in different ways. Dick is now reaping what he has sown and has trained Dani well, even if he never realized that children learn more from the example set by their parents than from the parent's words. Maybe if he had stayed and actually raised them instead of popping in and out for trips to Disneyland and for ice cream, he might have learned a thing or two about parenting. But he had a bartending job, wanted to travel and wanted to do drugs. So, he just played the fun Dad, rather than the father. As I quoted from Cat's Cradle in the post that started this thread: And when I hung up the phone it occured to me, (s)he'd grown up just like me.... Yep, Dani has.
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Milosmom
Member
06-10-2006
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 7:34 am
Vincent has posted negative things about Dick and Dani, agrees Dick has a big mouth, etc. I have found him to be very articulate and honest.
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Allietex
Member
08-16-2002
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 7:55 am
We should all remember that all people tend to put the spin on their comments to mske themselves look their best. It is normal human behavior. We actually have no idea what caused the breach between Dani and Dick. Her refusal to discuss it on the show could indicate two very opposite reasons. First, is that it was something very serious between them that was so painful that she has never discussed it with anyone and certainly is not going to do so on national TV. Second, it was something so silly that she knows she is going to look really stupid so she refuses to discuss it hoping people will assume it was something too serious to discuss in public. As for Vincent, what we have read by him as opposed to what we have seen of her, means absolutely nothing. Vincent is under no pressure, he can answer questions and discuss the situation calmly and reasonably. Dani on the other hand is under enormous pressure, and is being pressured to discuss her most private thoughts before millions of people. As for his relationship with Dick as opposed to her relationship with him, that also means nothing. We have seen the possibilites already discussed on this thread. But it could simply be that people are different. They react differently to situations and events. We have seen cases where one sibling is a mass murderer and the others are very nice people. And just because two people are related to or raised by the same people does not mean they were treated the same. As far as Dick's abandoning his kids, we have only small things Dick has let drop and as I said we always word things to put ourselves in the best light. From some things he talked about one day about his life style in the past, I would not be surprised if that time of his life was a very poor environment for kids. We have no way of knowing both sides of the story unless his mother decides to speak up which apparently she is not going to do. I do not care for either Dick or Dani. I find them both self centered, and not very pleasant people. I think the most telling thing about them is how cold and stand offish she is toward him. She seldom lets him touch her. They have no conversations about their past lives. Whem I get with members of my family, we constanly talk about "old times." You hear nothing about all that from these two. It is all game or bashing the other houseguests. It is almost as though they are complete strangers. I find that really bizarre. I think what I see is that Dani's personality is pretty much what I imagine Dick's would have been 20 years ago. She is self centered. She sees the world through how it involves her. She sees herself as better that the others in the house. How many times have we heard the contemptous words, "These people..." If things do not go right for her she whines and cries about how unfair it is. Everything is about her. Dick has gained some maturity through age and experience, but his basic personality is still the same. He is self centered, he treats others like dirt, he sees himself as better than other people, amd if things do not go his way, he curses and verbally abuses people. Even his desire to reestablish relations with Dani seem to be more about him than about her. It is all about him. They are pretty much two of a kind. But we do not really know what has made them that way. That is still speculation.
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Merrysea
Member
08-13-2004
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 9:32 am
Okay, here's another theory. From everything I've read about their relationship, Dick and Dani seemed to be close until she started seeing Kris. Yet, from reading various threads on this board, Kris is the good guy and Dick is the bad guy. I know that Dani said that Kris has always been there for her, but if he is a controlling person (which we couldn't tell from his two minutes or less on TV), he may have been the cause of the problems between Dick and Dani. As I said, just another theory, just like everything else I've read. None of us knows the facts, no matter how many times we see something posted on the Internet or what we've watched in the pressure-cooker situation that is the Big Brother house. Also, I have a really good relationship with all of my sons, but if the three of us were locked in a house for three months with absolutely no access to the outside world, I'm pretty sure we'd be at each other's throats, too! 
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Cmist
Member
09-20-2005
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 11:20 am
One thing is very clear to me now that Dick and Dani do trust one another and that is the basis for a secure family bond. I sort of wavered for a while as to Dani's true commitment but after hearing her say last night that she went into the meeting with the jury meeting intending not to campaign against Dick I am convinced that she is totally committed. I was concerned with her going to be and "bratty" behavior but I think that was just the way she deals with things. Some people need time to deal alone and others need supportive conversation. I feel much better about her now that I see she is understanding that her father didn't try to throw her under the bus. I think they will be ok in the future. THey are very differnt personalities however which is very evident.
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Mssas
Member
08-04-2006
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 11:34 am
She only trusted him in the house because he was her father and she knew he wouldn't hurt her no matter what. As far as outside the house...I don't see anything getting better for these 2. Just My Honest Opinion, but I don't see or feel the love.
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Milosmom
Member
06-10-2006
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 11:56 am
I see the love in both of their eyes, and I hope they will be happy. What a hard summer they had, but I think it did them both some good.
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Lanative
Member
07-24-2007
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 12:03 pm
All the post --what will be "their" response when they get out and read the boards. Dick - that's east a big FU to anybody and everybody who has any comment. Dani- "That's not faaaaair" "These people don't even know me" "They don't know what I've gone through"
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Milosmom
Member
06-10-2006
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 12:16 pm
I can think of one thread here Dick will like!
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Hiyall
Member
07-06-2005
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 2:46 pm
You know it could be possible that Vincent sees BOTH their faults, and sees his Dad trying and Danielle not responding. It doesn't mean he's doing what he can to gain "daddy's love". I have SEEN Dick try to get Danielle to tell him what she wants and her response is "you don't understand, you're not listening, or I'm not doing this now" I believe Danielle's troubled realationships with others speak very loud and clear.
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Realurker
Member
08-10-2004
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 3:11 pm
There have been some very thoughtful discussions here. Don't forget we saw on the feeds or live (I can't remember) that Dani told her father he was like a "mean friend" We saw what ED did to others this summer, I can believe it.
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Kalekona
Member
06-12-2005
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 3:20 pm
what we saw Daniele say was he was a mean friend because she didn't want to hear she was self centered or any other negative input. So what it came down to was If Dick criticized or corrected her he was being mean.
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Christiii
Member
07-07-2005
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 3:34 pm
Great post Allietex!! i totally agree!!
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Costacat
Member
07-15-2000
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 4:09 pm
Dani herself called him "mean" when he was criticizing her. I think Dani's definition of a "mean friend" more closely matches Kale's (wherein Dick criticized or corrected her, or said something she didn't want to hear, so he was being "mean").
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Hermione69
Member
07-24-2002
| Monday, September 17, 2007 - 4:13 pm
Dick was kind of mean to a lot of people on the show. He wasn't the only one, but I do think he wins the mean prize as far as behavior goes. IMHO.
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