Author |
Message |
Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 3:45 pm
Either that or she is working hard to make 500k.
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Scooterrific
Member
07-08-2005
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 3:47 pm
He apologized to her and she accepted.
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M4nd33
Member
07-12-2011
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 3:48 pm
It's fine for Jeff to have his opinion, just as it is fine for me to think he's a complete and utter d-bag.
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Nyheat
Member
08-09-2006
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 3:54 pm
I haven't been following the show, but read the comments on here so feel I have a small acquaintance with the houseguests. Sometimes people have blind spots, and they aren't even aware of them until they overreact and say something ignorant out of fear. Sounds like this is Jeff's blind spot. Maybe he needs to do some serious thinking on the subject and come to a better understanding. I hope he does.
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Shenanagon
Member
07-28-2009
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:06 pm
CBS released a statement that covered them and expressed that the show is about capturing people being real, saying real things, exposing prejudices etc it's a reality show but the views of the people LIKE JEFF on the show do not represent the views of CBS. I think there is something to be said for this being a 24/7 cameras on you experience. Imagine that for a minute. I personally would never do a show with that much exposure. BB is a fan favorite amongst the reality show for just that reason. We see alot. We're watching for just these moments. To feel better about ourselves. Wow Jeff is great but he did this. I'm better I didn't do that, well, at least nothing you've done is online in video lol it's so safe and annonymous to speak poorly of a person we've never met instead of speaking from talking with the person and speaking of them after you've heard how they felt about this blunder.
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Kebob
Member
09-16-2006
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:25 pm
I'm going to agree with Nyheat. I saw it live, and I think Jeff surprised himself (and everyone else) with his reaction. And then he saw their faces, realized he was so out of bounds, tried to bluff it off and then smartly, shut up. Brandon would NEVER have shut up had he been the one. Jeff is wrong, but I hope he saw something ugly in himself and will think about changing it.
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Sanfranjoshfan
Member
09-17-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:36 pm
"instead of speaking from talking with the person and speaking of them after you've heard how they felt about this blunder." Blunders........he used homophobic slurs on BB in 2009, so it's no longer an isolated case of having accidentally misspoken....it seems to be a pattern. Big difference. A lot of people aren't bothered much by his remark because they can't personally relate to it, but being a gay man, I really don't like the way he implied that people like me can't be trusted around children. If he made made a similar angry remark about race instead of homosexuality, I doubt he'd be defended at all. JMO
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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-16-2003
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:37 pm
I think some ideas are Society Norms more than individual thinking. Most men are not that interested in very young children unless its THEIR children. so its easy for people to Question motives IF the guy is not parentally motivated. AND if a person knows that the Teacher had no option but to take Any job that came open. Frogi I really don't see the problem. Just because he is not married and no kids? its like my daycare example. I highly question why a man with no family reasons for having a daycare wants to be hands on changing diapers and other what Society considers "feminine" work. I dont think of it as being sexually motivated, just questionable. i dont think its right that we jump to ANY conclusions, but if its Not a SOCIETY NORM, people do. Trouble is that so many dont seem to understand that GLTG IS a society norm and always has been to a degree in antiquity. i dont have a lot of understanding about labelling people tho. I luckily was raised in a Christian/ atheist household. my parents had church friends and Drug addicted, battling alcoholism and open sexuality friends. my parents had no qualms about going to GLTG bars while dating back in the 50s. I also was raised with Hippy commune kids. I was raised to accept people FOR THEMSELVES not how they look or what they do in their private lives and whether they want to Dress in full drag to go out. its not my business to judge. However I do find it FUN while online at Bigbrother so i'm sure i confuse the HECK out of readers. Unfortunately, jeff spoke his mind on Live FEEDS and wasnt as eloquent as he wanted to be. I'm sure the TV show will smooth it over by a 'funny' Diary room session. }
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Lexie_girl
Member
07-30-2004
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:57 pm
The problem is that Jeff's statement perpetuates a MYTH that gay man are inherently untrustworthy around children. SFJF, my cousin, who is gay, has been with his partner for 20 years and both he and his partner are the best uncles to his sister's children. My cousin and her husband had no qualms about leaving their children with him and his partner to babysit when the children were younger. I didn't hear what Jeff said last night and I have only seen the first Harry Potter movie (one was enough), but I did want to post that not everyone believes that myth.
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 4:58 pm
Nothing about what Jeff did makes me feel better about myself. I understand the guy is human, makes mistakes, may react inappropriately at times and still is overall a decent guy with many good qualities. However, all of that doesn't change the fact that the attitudes that he expressed at that moment are the very things that deeply hurt innocent people. He was absolutely furious over the idea that a gay man could be trusted to run an institution that educates children. There is no way around that. But life goes on and hopefully Jeff will get to know more gay people and come to realize that they are the same as heterosexual people - equally trustworthy and in some situations equally bad but the same overall.
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Konamouse
Member
07-15-2001
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 5:00 pm
Pedophiles (people interested in sexual activity with children) are more likely to be heterosexual than homosexual. Jeeesh. Most homosexuals are interested in MEN (not children). Just as most lesbians are interested in WOMEN (not children). http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1556756 http://www.fallwell.com/pedophilia.html

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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-16-2003
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 7:58 pm
understand the guy is human, makes mistakes, may react inappropriately at times and still is overall a decent guy with many good qualities and on a completely different nonrelated subject, that statement from Jimmer is also why many women will stay with a physical abuser for years. A lot of times there are redeeming factors to the relationship that none of us on the outside understand. to bring this back to jeff, i like many other watchers, find jeff's temper and snarkiness unsettling. we all saw him lash out at Jordan a number of times during his season, jordan told others that the Amazing Race people had to separate them due to jeff's anger AND we have seen him tell her to shut up and BE QUIET! a few tmes in this season. so it aint just his ONE quirk of being antigay.
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Sanfranjoshfan
Member
09-17-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:18 pm
I think women often stay with their abusers because they develop low self esteem from the constant abuse and that often results in them being too afraid to leave. I believe they usually stay out of fear, not because their abuser is an "overall a decent guy with many good qualities". It's the Stockholm Syndrome, not "good qualities" that keeps women in abusive relationships.
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Chewpito
Member
01-03-2004
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:39 pm
Oh San, having been there....I would agree 100%....I have nothing more to say....you said it!
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Jmm
Moderator
08-15-2002
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:44 pm
Sanfran, You are exactly right. Been there, done that, didn't even get the dang t-shirt.
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Scubalass
Member
07-01-2004
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:45 pm
<77> ...... Jeff and Jordan to me have a great relationship ... Brenchal now that is the oddest relationship ever. <77>
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Chewpito
Member
01-03-2004
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:46 pm
JMM, was there a tee shirt???....Kidden....but I wish I had one....
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Lgary26
Member
08-18-2006
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:47 pm
I so agree, I don't see their relationship as abusive in the least bit. <77>
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Southerngirl
Member
07-28-2008
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 8:58 pm
So now Jeff is an abuser???I don't see that at all. I don't think for one minute Jordan Lloyd would stay in this relationship if he was. He apologized <77>
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Jimmer
Moderator
08-30-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 9:35 pm
Jeff has some ideas about gay people that I disagree with but I don't see any real evidence that Jeff is an abuser.
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Earthmother
Member
07-13-2002
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 10:14 pm
I totally trust my son and my son in law with our kids. It would never enter my mind to think that they are any different than any other family member. Molesters can be heterosexuals too. Why would you trust your young daughter to a heterosexual man? People are who they are and unfortunately some of them are evil, it has nothing to do with your hetero or homosexuality. I've always felt that Jeff has a feminin side (that's the cute part we all like) and maybe that scares him. I am not giving him a pass by any means, but some people handle their fear in bizarre ways. Hopefully he will see the reaction that his behavior spurns and will get educated.
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Kswheels
Member
06-30-2005
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 10:18 pm
Don't agree with what Jeff said, but I'm not going to join the angry mob either. Generally decent people hold ignorant beliefs sometimes. It's whatever. It says more about his upbringing and the culture he grew up around than anything.
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Sunshyne4u
Member
06-16-2003
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 10:22 pm
my experience with abusers and a fair number of friends IS RELEVANT as well. i appreciate all your opinions however, there are many strong Confident women who stick with abusers. even two of my aunts could fall into that category. so basically, i dont agree that for the majority, it is all about 'poor self esteem'. it sure wasnt For me, and i refuse to share any personal stories for you guys to rip apart. i also object to the wording of CONSTANT abuse. my post clearly refers to Jimmers post about men who may react inappropriately at times. Some men lash out like maybe once or twice a year. THESE are the guys I am referring to. good guys, good fathers who act out if going thru bad times. as for my jeff comments, there are multiple sites and multiple threads that have also seen the same as i. not sure how anyone could have missed his many infractions thru his season. anyways, to each their own.
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Southerngirl
Member
07-28-2008
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 10:55 pm
The main thing Jeff objected to was the headmaster/character in a CHILDREN'S BOOK being gay. Many of my third graders who were better readers read those books. I agree...not appropriate for an 8 year old.Jeff confirmed to Brendon that there wasn't much he could say that wouldn't make him sound bad. He said something like he didn't care if they ran camps, he just doesn't agree with the storyline being appropriate for children. I don't think it makes him a bad person because he doesn't agree with a character in a children's book.
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Sanfranjoshfan
Member
09-17-2000
| Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 10:56 pm
When I use the term "abuser" I am going by this definition: ------------------------------------------- From my Mac's built in New Oxford American Dictionary: abuser |əˈbyoōzər| noun [usu. with adj. ] someone who regularly or habitually abuses someone or something, in particular • someone who makes excessive use of alcohol or illegal drugs : intravenous drug abusers. • someone who sexually assaults another person, esp. a woman or child : an alleged child abuser. ------------------------------------------- "i also object to the wording of CONSTANT abuse." I was not referring to Jeff and Jordan when I used the term "constant abuse"....I was referring to women with low esteem stemming from constant abuse from an abusive partner. Besides, I don't believe Jeff is an "abuser" as I understand the term. He's just very ignorant about gay people and occasionally guilty of second degree douche-baggery. "Some men lash out like maybe once or twice a year. THESE are the guys I am referring to. good guys, good fathers who act out if going thru bad times. " In my book, "abusers" are not "good guys" because good guys do not consistently hurt the people they claim to love. Everyone "lashes out" on occasion, but they don't give their loved ones black eyes or break their bones. Breaking a wife's arm or punching her in the face even ONE TIME makes the guy both an "abuser" and a "bad guy".
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